Ah that works as well. If you're implying something, and I respond in kind and you follow through; then things should be fine.!
Yes, that's exactly it and why I'm hoping he will take the next step. He's implied a great deal and I've implied a great deal. So I feel the next step on his part would be to suggest something that would be unambiguous, such as dinner. There is more to my story, which is, in short: when the feelings between us became apparent a few months ago, I was unavailable and he was dating someone on a casual basis. I'm soon moving to my own place (I've become available) and have made that known. I don't know where things stand with the girl he's dating (which is long distance), other than it doesn't seem serious (because of the feelings he seems to have for me).
olded is exactly the issue. There is signaling, then I follow up that signaling, but it's one sided there. They don't reciprocate. Asking someone out is a blatant display of interest, and as long as you stay true to that interest and don't respond in an ambiguous way, it will all be smooth..
A certain level of vagueness is okay... but then there is that line where it seems like a pointless effort to constantly try to understand motivations. It's that tertiary Ni of IS_Ps, if it gets overworked we get very frustrated. We try to see where the person is coming from, and need Se information to confirm it...!
I understand what you're saying. I knew someone once who was constantly coming forward and then retreating. I felt it was intentional on his part, a way of getting high on the attention but never having to actually commit to any degree with the other person. It's a form of manipulation. In his case, he made a career of this. It was pathological. But definitely, if you're making yourself clear, then they should be clear with you. NF's, though, need to step back and process feelings--think about things--before taking a step. It could be that's what they're doing. But if they're waffling for too long, I would let them go. I wouldn't want someone who felt about me in a tepid way, which is how I might interpret that kind of behavior.
Well of course he's not going to take the next step. How long have you been doing this with him? He's an INTP, they are pretty bad with emotions, especially romantic ones. It's a relief to them to have someone else do all of the initiating. He probably feels deeply for you but doesn't know what to do. Expecting that of him is futile... INTP males often get annoyed in romance because of the expectations put upon them like these.
He is, I think, an INFP--I see him mostly on the job, so he has to project the T (as do I)--but personally, he seems to lead with his feelings and N. I should have said XNFP/J. He's very good with emotions. When I talk with him about how I'm feeling, he completely gets it (even before I tell him how I'm feeling). I feel he's thinking about where he wants to take things with me. I would tell him how I feel, if I was in a safe place (at some intimate setting but NOT at work, definitely). I feel he may be thinking about creating an opportunity like this. Interesting, though, the perspective on INTP males and getting annoyed in romance because of expectations. Something to keep in mind.
Thanks for your kind thoughts!