[ENFJ] My Personal ENFJ Experiment

[Venom]

Abstract: Many persons have had different opinions of how much of type is innate vs learned/socialized. This particular study will start with the assumption that someone who identifies with an xxxx distinction (as in "no type"), can effectively imitate ANY type, with practice, and without too much discomfort.

Experiment: I will impersonate an ENFJ for the next __________ # of days (how non-J of me ), to the best of my abilities and detail it here for everyone's amusement. At the end of the experiment, I will make some qualitative judgments about how easy this experiment was to accomplish effectively.

Background: I have typed INFP, ENFP, ENTP, INTJ and ENTJ over the course of my MBTI experience. I have come to identify with no particular type beyond being intuitive. This thread will however NOT be about my type or lack of type. I provide the info ONLY for background information.

Methods:
I will be attempting to assimilate any number of ENFJ characteristics over the course of the experiment. Suggestions, comments and praise are all welcome!

 

[Amargith]

Dude, give it up, you demonstrated this morning you cannot keep it up. Mission failed!

 

[Venom]

ENFJ Experiment Entry #1

Methods: Smiling

This morning I awoke at 4:40am (this is not related to the experiment) and arrived at the library to get some much needed work done. From here my movement of the day consisted of 7-11 <--> library <--> class <--> food place <--> apartment.

On a typical day, I smile about 4 times (im pulling that # from nowhere)...for the whole day. I avoid eye contact and if I have nothing short of a superbowl victory, I feel there is no need for smiling (especially AT people). Today I attempted, no forced myself, to carry a smile for the ENTIRETY of the day. This meant two things:

a) during the movement I described above: I had to smile AT people as I walked along. This felt extremely strange...almost creepy. I couldnt muster up a pearly white smile; it was more like a cheery lips closed smile.

b) even while sitting in class, or staring at the computer, I forced myself to keep up this smile game!


Results:
a) about 3 older adults who I did not know, smiled back for a split second
b) about 4 attractive females smiled back for a split second
b1) one person waved at me (someone that basically doesnt even talk to me)
c) many people did not look at me
d) some people looked at me, and had no reaction


Thoughts and Reflections:
At first I was scared. I thought, "wont people think, 'what the fuck is this guy so god damned happy about?'" or "Is he on something today?" or even slightly better, "I wonder who must have laid him last night ". However, as the day went on, I actually sort of enjoyed it. I was shocked! My day just seemed so much easier to get through. The weather didnt bother me as much. I also didnt feel as lonely, even though its not like I made any new friends. I also felt a lot more attractive, and therefore more confident.

It was almost like a feedback loop that kept feeding itself. My face muscles are actually tired from all of this half-smiling. They must be out of shape.

x 1,000,000


Any suggestions for my next ENFJ method? Anything I need to be doing? It can be ANYTHING

 

[file cabinet]

I have done the smiling thing before too as I normally don't do or think about that (I didn't do it because i wanted to impersonate an enfj though). i had similar results. one thing I did find is if I smile really really hard for like 5-10 mins in the morning (do it til your face hurts and raise those cheekbones, I'm talking about a true smile here), it seems like it helps loosen your face muscles and subsequently makes it easier to smile throughout the rest of the day
it sounds like your boost of confidence/whatever is probably more related to people smiling back at you and then you feel kind of.. well, boosted.
when i did this, I was thinking some of the similar things you described, "ppl must be wondering why I'm smiling!!".. but people are mostly concerned with themselves and don't really care whether you smile or not. smiling is open and friendly...

i think you should smile and talk to a stranger and also focus on being *genuinely* interested in what they save.. don't grill them with questions but be happy and friendly. enfj's also tend to always have a lot of shoes, so maybe wear some cool shoes (check zappos.com)

ooh and when you talk to someone, say their name.. people like it when you say their name. if you don't know their name, say "I'm Babylon, what is your name?" then use their name later in the convo. when you talk, keep eye contact ( without staring )

 

[Fidelia]

Do you feel guilty often? To be a proper ENFJ you really ought to practice that. Especially about things you didn't do wrong.

Openly offer opinions, but not to be obnoxious. Speak up when you see someone ultimately headed for pain if they don't change their course. You have to actually care when doing this.

I don't think you have to smile while not looking at people. Only when passing and looking at people. And smile with your eyes.

Initiate conversations. Know what everyone's SO, family members and close friends are called.

Have a bunch of irons in the fire.

Cultivate your flirting skills. ENFJs are effective flirters with everyone.

Be able to spin plates effectively. ENFJs are exceptional at that. Especially ones who teach.

 

[21%]

I'll be following this thread!

 

[nynesneg]

Do you feel guilty often? To be a proper ENFJ you really ought to practice that. Especially about things you didn't do wrong.

Openly offer opinions, but not to be obnoxious. Speak up when you see someone ultimately headed for pain if they don't change their course. You have to actually care when doing this.

I don't think you have to smile while not looking at people. Only when passing and looking at people. And smile with your eyes.

Initiate conversations. Know what everyone's SO, family members and close friends are called.

Cultivate your flirting skills. ENFJs are effective flirters with everyone.

ROFL you're a genius fidelia. So very true.

Some more things you must do to be a true ENFJ...

• Keep a constant mental list of tasks you need to do. Periodically update a written task list.
  .
• Feel nagging guilt anytime you aren't working on something on said list, but procrastinate frequently thus increasing the nagging guilt. List is much more extensive than the obvious tasks - it includes items as insignificant as folding laundry, painting the back porch, and writing a card to Aunt Sally. You ALWAYS have something that needs to get done.

That's all the lessons for now, my young padawan. /strokes chin.

I am quite intrigued with your smile observations, seriously. I've always smiled alot naturally, as a kid was called "smiley". Fascinating to see the contrasting view on life for someone who only smiles for amazing victories.

 

[Fecal McAngry]

Abstract: Many persons have had different opinions of how much of type is innate vs learned/socialized. This particular study will start with the assumption that someone who identifies with an xxxx distinction (as in "no type"), can effectively imitate ANY type, with practice, and without too much discomfort.

Experiment: I will impersonate an ENFJ for the next __________ # of days (how non-J of me ), to the best of my abilities and detail it here for everyone's amusement. At the end of the experiment, I will make some qualitative judgments about how easy this experiment was to accomplish effectively.

Background: I have typed INFP, ENFP, ENTP, INTJ and ENTJ over the course of my MBTI experience. I have come to identify with no particular type beyond being intuitive. This thread will however NOT be about my type or lack of type. I provide the info ONLY for background information.

Methods:
I will be attempting to assimilate any number of ENFJ characteristics over the course of the experiment. Suggestions, comments and praise are all welcome!

On what day do you become Dr. Phil????

 

[yenom]

If your Ti is strong, its very hard to use Fe.

 

[ReadingRainbows]

Do you feel guilty often? To be a proper ENFJ you really ought to practice that. Especially about things you didn't do wrong.

Openly offer opinions, but not to be obnoxious. Speak up when you see someone ultimately headed for pain if they don't change their course. You have to actually care when doing this.

I don't think you have to smile while not looking at people. Only when passing and looking at people. And smile with your eyes.

Initiate conversations. Know what everyone's SO, family members and close friends are called.

Have a bunch of irons in the fire.

Cultivate your flirting skills. ENFJs are effective flirters with everyone.

Be able to spin plates effectively. ENFJs are exceptional at that. Especially ones who teach.

I'm an INFJ and I do this :/

 

[OrangeAppled]

Do you feel guilty often? To be a proper ENFJ you really ought to practice that. Especially about things you didn't do wrong.

Openly offer opinions, but not to be obnoxious. Speak up when you see someone ultimately headed for pain if they don't change their course. You have to actually care when doing this.

I don't think you have to smile while not looking at people. Only when passing and looking at people. And smile with your eyes.

Initiate conversations. Know what everyone's SO, family members and close friends are called.

Have a bunch of irons in the fire.

Cultivate your flirting skills. ENFJs are effective flirters with everyone.

Be able to spin plates effectively. ENFJs are exceptional at that. Especially ones who teach.

Smile with the eyes
Not the whole face.... ENFJs seem to know this makes people think you're an idiot. But their eyes always look happy (unless they take off the social mask and open up with a close friend, in which case they look they're about to die).

Also, temper the opinions you give when people disagree with you. ENFJs will backtrack just a bit so as not to rock the boat in conversation....

 

[The Third Rider]

 

[Fidelia]

Me too Rainbows, but ENFJs do it MORE. Especially the feeling inordinate guilt thing. And the lists. And older ENFJs put us to shame for the amount they get done in a day (although they'll be writing the speech in the car on the way to the event they are speaking at and still be flawless). Good ones OA!

BC - take lessons in turkey/roast carving. ENFJs are excellent hosts!

 

[nynesneg]

I'm an INFJ and I do this :/

You can spin plates? I wanna learn!!

 

[Venom]

ok so some things I need:

I need some books to get me into the ENFJ mindset a little better.

For example: If this was the INTJ experiment, I'd be reading ayn rand's "atlas shrugged". If this was the ENTJ thread, I'd be reading "the 48 rules of power". If this was the ENTP thread I might be reading Richard Feynman's "What Do You Care What Other People Think?: Further Adventures of a Curious Character".

I'd really like to avoid reading an ESFJ book by accident. I think even an INFJ book might be alright. Im thinking fiction or non fiction. Preferably something a male could tolerate .

 

[Fecal McAngry]

ok so some things I need:

I need some books to get me into the ENFJ mindset a little better.

For example: If this was the INTJ experiment, I'd be reading ayn rand's "atlas shrugged". If this was the ENTJ thread, I'd be reading "the 48 rules of power". If this was the ENTP thread I might be reading Richard Feynman's "What Do You Care What Other People Think?: Further Adventures of a Curious Character".

I'd really like to avoid reading an ESFJ book by accident. I think even an INFJ book might be alright. Im thinking fiction or non fiction. Preferably something a male could tolerate .

One I would personally suggest: Amazon.com: And A Voice to Sing With: A Memoir (9780671400620): Joan Baez: Books

And here's a song she wrote about a certain exasperating INFP:

YouTube - Joan Baez - Diamonds and Rust

 

[Venom]

One I would personally suggest: Amazon.com: And A Voice to Sing With: A Memoir (9780671400620): Joan Baez: Books

And here's a song she wrote about a certain exasperating INFP:

YouTube - Joan Baez - Diamonds and Rust

wait, wait wait!!! Shes writing songs about INFPs...you're an INFP... Are you sure her book would put me into the ENFJ mindset? I'll nonetheless check it out. Thanks for the suggestion.


(I give the INFJs more slack, I'll admit it.)

 

[nynesneg]

No idea on good books, sorry not much help. I read lots of business books.

 

[Venom]

Sketches From a Hunter's Album by Ivan Turgenev

According to DN's author list (and apparently solitary walker) Ivan Turgenev was an ENFJ. He was a 18th century Russian novelist and playwright. This seems perfect! If anyone else has any suggestions, please don't hesitate to contribute .

 

[Fecal McAngry]

wait, wait wait!!! Shes writing songs about INFPs...you're an INFP... Are you sure her book would put me into the ENFJ mindset? I'll nonetheless check it out. Thanks for the suggestion.

Joan Baez is an ENFJ, so it's a very ENFJ take on a specific INFP. Among other things. Oprah is an ENFJ. The Obamanation is an ENFJ. Dr. Phil is an ENFJ. The Evil Bill Clinton is an ENFJ not ENFP or whatever else he's popularly typed as, and "pure psychopath" to quote The Silence of the Lambs. They all have books, I believe. You want a book by an INFJ? Try Ron Paul's END THE FED--a great example, I think, of why INFJs really make a lousy substitute for ENFJs in an exercise like this...