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  1. #1
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Default Hate an ENFJ? Tell us why!

    For real serious. We can handle it.

    Substitute, you are not allowed to say ANYTHING!
    Last edited by proteanmix; 11-06-2007 at 04:02 PM. Reason: Removed emotional plea
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  2. #2
    On a mission Usehername's Avatar
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    pssh impossible! no one hates an enfj!!
    *You don't have a soul. You are a Soul. You have a body.
    *Faith is the art of holding on to things your reason once accepted, despite your changing moods.
    C.S. Lewis

  3. #3
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    I know right? But tragically, somewhere out in the world, there are ENFJs daring to make enemies.

    I have my own theory as to why this is so, but I'll withhold until there are more comments.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  4. #4
    Senior Member Lookin4theBestNU's Avatar
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    I don't think this thread will end up being as as the ENFP one! We can handle it.
    "At points of clarity, I realize that my life on earth is meaningless, and that I am merely a pawn in a bigger game. A game I cannot possibly understand or have control of. Thankfully, before depression sets in, I drift back into my cloudy, bewildered daily routine." **Joel Patrick Warneke**

  5. #5
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    I have a problem with ENFJ's neglect of their own needs. It is OK to want something. My question to you is, "what do you want?". Because I have observed ENFJ's give so much more than they are given.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lookin4theBestNU View Post
    I don't think this thread will end up being as as the ENFP one! We can handle it.
    I think you're right Lookin4. Somehow I think this thread will definately not be as light and fluffy.
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Littlelostnf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Schizm View Post
    I have a problem with ENFJ's neglect of their own needs. It is OK to want something. My question to you is, "what do you want?". Because I have observed ENFJ's give so much more than they are given.

    Many times I've said exactly what I want. In clear distinct english and still the person or persons seem to not hear me. Example: Please would you do a, c, d, e, f - z but for the love of goodness please don't do b. The person does b and then says tome if I ask why they did it what's wrong with you?

    I say what I want and people ignore it. I'm not unclear altho it's true I think..does this sound unreasonable or bossy or whatever. When I deliver a message about what I want or how I feel you can believe it's been thought about. How can I ask for what I want and get it without imposing on someone elses freedoms or wants. (and the down side...when I get sick of doing that and don't think about the other persons feelings they get upset and huffy and say you're not thinking about ME!
    for my life is slowed up by thought and the need to understand what I am living.

  8. #8
    Wait, what? Varelse's Avatar
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    Some ENFJ comments that have annoyed me:

    "You need to listen to me because I'm better with people and have read the Bible more than you."

    Telling me that I need to obey my parents in all cases, even if I'm risking my life in the process. (Yes, really.)

    And a general attitude of moral superiority because "people like me."
    We are not poets
    We have no right to make amendments

  9. #9
    にゃん runvardh's Avatar
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    It's a real pain in the ass to show them that yes you really do give a shit, 100 fucking %.
    Dreams are best served manifest and tangible.

    INFP, 6w7, IEI

    I accept no responsibility, what so ever, for the fact that I exist; I do, however, accept full responsibility for what I do while I exist.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  10. #10
    Wait, what? Varelse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    It's a real pain in the ass to show them that yes you really do give a shit, 100 fucking %.
    True.

    Especially when they're going for the whole romantic, writing poems thing and I'm sitting there going....
    We are not poets
    We have no right to make amendments

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