[Jungian Cognitive Functions] Functions that attract you

[INTPness]

I'm going to post this in the NF forum because I've mostly dated NF's.

Think about your past (and present) significant others and list the functions that you have really enjoyed or that attracted you to them, along with the functions that you had difficulties with (and maybe a short description of why you're attracted to it or why not).

I am usually attracted to/enjoy these functions:
1. Ne (insane connection, lots to talk about)
2. Ni (hard to put a finger on it, but there's still very good conversation)
3. Fe (as a primary function it can be a little overbearing at times - kind of like Te, but overall or as an auxiliary function it is kind of smooth, easy, open, and nice - makes things comfortable for me)

Neutral functions:
1. Ti (not really sure how this affects me in another person)
2. Si (not sure)

Functions that have been difficult for me in a significant other:
1. Te (I respect it in business settings, but would not want my g/f or wife bossing me around or trying to "organize" me).
2. Fi (like pulling teeth to have an intimate conversation)
3. Se (I don't usually know what to say to them other than "Oh, that's great.")

 

[Totenkindly]

my list is very similar to yours.

I am usually attracted to/enjoy these functions:
- Ne (I "get crazy" with other Ne's, we are springboarding ALL over the place).. probably #1 for me
- Ti (we both deconstruct everything and discuss lots of ideas, provides a "rational foundation" to the discussion, we "get" each other)
- Ni (both good at seeing lots of facets of reality and entering new perspectives)
- Fe (I can talk the talk, I know the rules, I know what to expect, I know how to affirm them, it's just pleasant and safe and can generate feelings of closeness)


More neutralfunctions:
- Si (a sense of nostalgia and home-i-ness, we both are connected to a similar vision/past and thus are "family" in some way)
- Fi (the more it aligns with my Ti perception the better, but when we're at odds i can get really frustrated)

Functions that have been difficult for me at times:
- Te (I feel like it is worried too much about making things fit in the box, rather than making sure the box is right... hence it violates the inherent definitions of things sometimes).
- Se (have no idea of how to interact, I have trouble just living in the pure moment and responding to it, and Se is not contemplative)

NOTE: I have trouble isolating the functions like this because they work in tandem. You can't discuss just a perception or just a judgment process, you need both a perceptive and judging process working together.

Hence, I get along with INTP better than ISTP even though both are Ti, I get along with ESTP better than ESFP even if both are Se, I get along better with INFP than ENFP even though both are Ne, I get along better with INFJ than INTJ even though both are Ni, etc.

 

[JustHer]

Functions I am usuallly attracted to:
Ti - Stimulates my Te, has me actually try to understand complex problems before solving them, helps me back up an argument, inspires my actions
Ni - Always causes fascinating conversations and has me exploring and appreciating my random thoughts I often don't give enough credit to
Se - Brings out my Se, which allows me to relax and enjoy myself =D
Fe - As long as it's not a primary function, it always stuns me with its selflessness and givingness

Neutral:
Ne - Could be interesting at times, could be annoying at times
Te - Generally feels good having someone else take over, but can be annoying if it is used past its welcomeness

Generally have trouble with:
Si - Users frequently think I am insane. Can sometime be really stubborn, and scare me with their extreme groundedness.
Fi - Can be frustrating when they don't recognise that they're using Fi rather than Ti. Also, they can believe Te (their inferior) has no value (grr), and I don't like it when I get stuck in the irrational decisions they make.

 

[Liquid and Flammable]

The first and best is Ne. I really like to share ideas and talking about visions and possibilities. That can be very crazy, and if we stop talking about that and begin to do it, it can get a real firework.

The ones, who follow are (not ordered): Fe, Ni, Ti
- Fe because of the great warmth and understanding of people and social values. I like talking about this things, and share experiences.
- Ni because of the other sight of seeing the world. Gives me opportunity to see a different world from a different point of view.
- Ti because of it's established logical thoughts. A good Ti is the best critic one can have. Sometimes it overshoots the mark, but often it's a good direction to follow.

Neutral ones: Si, Se
- Se is the party-function. It's okay for me, to see them. They're funny, and flirting with them can be exciting. But if they overdo, they tend to be annoying. But it's possible to ignore that.
- Si has not much influence. If someone uses Si, it can help, because it's a good critic for my lack of exactness. If this is overdone, I get annoyed.

Functions I don't like: Te, Fi
- Te feels very hard and restrictive. My open-minded approach to life is blocked by ESTJs and sometimes ENTJs (ENTJs can be retuned with arguments, ESTJs not, because they don't understand them). I have no way to handle this
- Fi is very subjective. Sometimes it seems unethical like Te for me. Especially ESFPs are annoying, and I know some ENFPs who uses it to behave ruthless. And INFPs are sad, while I don't understand the reason. I don't like people, who avoid conflicts.

 

[Polaris]

Please note that these are just my romantic leanings. They're not meant to reflect my overall attitude toward any given type.

Best

Ne - The most lovable, stimulating thing imaginable.


Good

Se - A thunderstorm of sexual energy.

Fi - An inner warmth that shines through.

Ni - A quiet, entrancing intensity.


Okay

Te - I'm pleased by the strength, but I hate to be dominated.

Fe - A lot of warmth, but I'm put off by any hint of patronization.

Ti - Cute when paired with dominant Ne, but otherwise a little dry for me.


Bad

Si - Grounding, reliable, and zero sexual magnetism.

. . . We're sitting here discussing the attractiveness of psychological definitions. It's disturbing how close this comes to fetishism.

 

[INTPness]

Se - A thunderstorm of sexual energy.

How so??

And how does it compare/contrast with Ne? Is Ne more of a mental stimulation whereas Se is more physical and focused on the senses??

I would have thought that N's connect more mentally and then that, in turn, gets the sexual thunderstorm going.

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

Functions in my own use:
Attractive:
Ne: I use it more to analyze. I've realized I *do* use it to jump to wild ideas, though I've stopped to express them for the most part.
Ni: Instight that carries me on.
Se: Being there, living in the moment. The fun and sorrow of life will not pass by. Okay, it's mostly about my lowly pleasures, but what the heck.
Fi: Understanding that I have a core, feelings, sense of me. I can be moved by another person. This is good.
Fe: I think there's a great deal of merit to considering other people. We need methods to utilize the group power that's possible, if we can communicate. Fe works to give motivation for something common. And, I do care about my fellow man.
Te: Way to make things happen, not having to live second-guessing.. I can affect, and see how the thing is affected.
Ti: Understanding something is really beautiful. I could almost dive in to only dedicate my life to understanding stuff. Almost.

Something else:
Si: Necessary evil.

Functions in my significant other:
Attractive:
Ne:Awesome.
Ni:Intriquing.
Fe:I wish some of this from my significant other.
Te:Good, they're getting stuff done. They know how things work.. because things don't work just by how they *are* (Ti), but what they *do*.
Ti:Wow, this is awesome in a significant other.

Depends
Fi:Hmmh, interesting, sometimes it has made the other person a sorry loser, because of so plainly expressed feelings of inadequacy, injustice in the world and stuff like that. If the person has felt okay, it has been great !
Se:Okay. Uhh, or just being materialistic, but, I like some of the stuff it brings with it.
most.
Si: If someone has it and doesn't bore me with it, okay.

 

[MrRandom]

So far people of different types seem to have roughly similar attractions. Peculiar.

Attractive:
Ne - Extremely comfortable zone to be in. Includes work and play at the same time.
Ni - Easy to be with, open-minded and understanding.

Not sure:
Ti - I'm not sure. I might like it a lot.
Fi - I'm not sure. There's always something slightly off.
Fe - Attractive as a secondary function, unattractive as a primary function.
Se - I have hard time believing that I'd be attracted to Se, although there's always something that I like in it, too.

Unattractive:
Si - Grounded, secure, old. For me, being boring is the number one turn off, so there's zero attraction involved. However, they are pretty harmless.
Te - Just... no.

 

[BlackCat]

Attractive-

Se- I like to have that physical connection to them. Love it when a woman is pragmatic.
Ne- It's fun and constructive.
Ti- I generally like P types, and my Fi would clash with another Fi most likely. Ti is pretty good overall.

So-so

Si- Again that sense of pragmatism, but eh.
Fi- It really all depends on whether we clash or not, as to whether it's good or bad.
Ni- People with Ni are either awesome and insightful or completely insane in my experience. It could go either way.
Fe- I like Fe in the __TPs. Thus why it's in the middle.

No thanks-

Te- Honestly. Just a bit too much for me.

 

[Charmed Justice]

Ne
Se
Ti
Fe

 

[Ghost of the dead horse]

To make the forum usable, remember not to hate Te for it's every occurance, okay?

 

[Wild horses]

I'm attracted to Si

 

[Wild horses]

Ok after reading this I realise that a more comprehensive answer is required... when I say attracted.. I am because I don't understand it... Se the same but if we're talking connecting with someone etc I am going to go with Ni and possibly Te... F's are a bit hit and miss with me

 

[Polaris]

How so??

And how does it compare/contrast with Ne? Is Ne more of a mental stimulation whereas Se is more physical and focused on the senses??

I would have thought that N's connect more mentally and then that, in turn, gets the sexual thunderstorm going.

In order to find someone attractive, I have to first be aware of them. In that respect, attraction always begins with the senses. The ensuing attraction, no matter what process triggers it, is always purely mental, though, and so I find it impossible to say that Ne stimulates my mind in any privileged sense. The sensory is as involved with my attraction to Ne as it is with my attraction to Se; and my attraction to Se is just as mental as my attraction to Ne.

 

[2XtremeENFP]

It's funny how everyone seems to be attracted to Ne

 

[BlackCat]

It's funny how everyone seems to be attracted to Ne

Notice the lack of SJs.

 

[ReadingRainbows]

Fe, Fi


FTW

 

[Charmed Justice]

Se is most attractive to me. I feel more free with people who are heavy on Se. Gets me out of my head, living and doing.

 

[Poki]

Fi, its like a drug for me.

 

[INTPness]

It's funny how everyone seems to be attracted to Ne

Mainly because this is the NF forum. If I asked the same question in SJ or SP, I'm sure the answers would be very different.