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[INFP] INFPs and Misanthropism

jawz

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Oct 21, 2009
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11
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I'm a swinger. Love people, hate people. Sometimes both at the same time. :huh:
 

Danse_Macabre

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Oct 28, 2009
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25
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ENFP
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2
I used to call myself a misanthrope. I thought I acsolutely hated humanity. I truly believed that we're all worthless scum.

And then it occurred to me that I didn't hate humans, I just hate how so many humans waste their lives and their potential to really give the planet something back, whether it be art, literature or a vegetable patch...

I think that it seems that for INFP's, what appears to be misanthropy really just seems to be disappointment. We love people so much, its so sad to see them be so greedy. At least that's what it's like for me...
 

Southern Kross

Away with the fairies
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Dec 22, 2008
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so/sp
I'm interested in this discussion. It seems like most of you are saying:

Idealism & optimism -> bad shit happens -> disappointment & disillusionment -> misanthopy

But is that really all that's to it, guys? And do you really think NFPs are that prone to this? Is it inevitable that we end up like this?

I have to admit as I get older my eyes are increasingly opened to the unpleasant realities going on around me. I've started to really wonder about the way the world works and the cruel things everyday people are capable of. Yet, I seem to be frequently trying to find a way to reconcile the negative stuff into a theory of humanity that I can ultimately live with. And its hard work but I think its worth it. I mean, if NFPs don't have hope, then who will?
 

KLessard

Aspiring Troens Ridder
Joined
Apr 25, 2008
Messages
595
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INFJ
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1w2
Those of us who survive to adulthood seem to develop some sort of coping mechanism. It could be a hard shell, or the ability to not give a damn what others think.


Hard shell: NFJ
Not give a damn what others think: NFP

???
 

Mad Hatter

Head Pigeon
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Au contraire, at least as far as I'm concerned :)
I'm quite susceptible to criticism or sometimes even gossip, and I definitely appreciate encouragement. Though I rarely show it when criticism hits me (and it hits me often), at least not in public, I have to talk to my friends who can give me reassurance that it's usually unwarranted.
Especially when someone makes an incompetent judgment about things that are really important to me, it can throw me so completely off track as to render me speechless and maybe cause my eyebrow to raise. Take all of the above together, and you might get the impression of indifference :)
 

chris09

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Oct 1, 2009
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INfP
And then it occurred to me that I didn't hate humans, I just hate how so many humans waste their lives and their potential to really give the planet something back, whether it be art, literature or a vegetable patch..

Sounds a bit like me about 5 or 6 years ago. I was a straight A student in high-school and thought that I had to someday make some mark on the world otherwise my life would have been a waste.

Then I put it all into the bigger perspective... No matter what I do, what I accomplish or achieve, given enough time, it will become meaningless and will be lost even beyond the history books.
I stand here on this little, tiny blue speck of a planet, that hangs in a cosmos that dwarfs it beyond all imagining. And in my tiny part of this tiny blue speck the entirety of my life will be played out alongside the lives of another 6 billion people.

Nothing I achieve or create will ever change the fact that my life, in the grand scheme of things is virtually meaningless.

For me, the only thing that makes sense is to try and help make sure my friends and those around me can also enjoy their brief turn at life. If at the end of my time here, even a single other person's life has been a bit easier and a bit happier thanks to me, I will die totally satisfied.
Everything else I do is just me enjoying life and filling in the time between being useful to that end.

---
SO in summary... (LOL) my cure to Misanthropy is a bit of perspective:

YouTube - Carl Sagan - Pale Blue Dot

Enjoy!!! :D
 

Agnosco311

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I used to call myself a misanthrope. I thought I acsolutely hated humanity. I truly believed that we're all worthless scum.

And then it occurred to me that I didn't hate humans, I just hate how so many humans waste their lives and their potential to really give the planet something back, whether it be art, literature or a vegetable patch...

I think that it seems that for INFP's, what appears to be misanthropy really just seems to be disappointment. We love people so much, its so sad to see them be so greedy. At least that's what it's like for me...

I think you nailed it... I know I'm down as an XNFP and most of my friends what say I'm extroverted but most times I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE...I'm a socialized INFP if there is such a thing... I hole myself up in a bookstore and I hope I don't know anybody walking through because I just don't want to talk to f***ing nobody... I think my faith in something beyond this world has helped me reconcile with all the bullshit going on here on earth and how people treat each other... although I am a big Boondock Saints fan and fantasize about eradicating the evil on Earth "so the good may flourish." (An admittedly dark fantasy not YET reenacted)

But, getting to the point, I agree with how people waste their lives... I refuse to do anything if I don't find a shred of meaning in it. I'd like to think we dislike most people but still have a soft spot for the good people (1%). I still don't think I could hate all people though... Way too generalized for me
 

Agnosco311

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For me, the only thing that makes sense is to try and help make sure my friends and those around me can also enjoy their brief turn at life. If at the end of my time here, even a single other person's life has been a bit easier and a bit happier thanks to me, I will die totally satisfied.
Everything else I do is just me enjoying life and filling in the time between being useful to that end.

Love your perspective
 

chris09

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Oct 1, 2009
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66
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INfP
Love your perspective
Thanks man. Don't get me wrong though, 99% of the time I fail, but these things take time I s'pose :)

The thing I'm curious about in this thread is that with all these NFP and their supposedly overly empathetic nature, I would have expected a bit more of a "Well, they are doing what they think is best, even if that is different to what I think would be best" type of attitude...?

(P.S. Anyone watch that video? It is a real favorite of mine! :D )
 

Biaxident

Charting a course
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Jan 10, 2009
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3,617
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INFP
The thing I'm curious about in this thread is that with all these NFP and their supposedly overly empathetic nature, I would have expected a bit more of a "Well, they are doing what they think is best, even if that is different to what I think would be best" type of attitude...?

Hell, I do kind of think that way most of the time. Unless they interfere with my life, or are hurting someone else.

And I am not blind to, what seems to be many people's incredible stupidity, and lack of knowledge. Plus, the seeming indifference to gaining knowledge, of even the most basic information that doesn't immediately effect their beer and Jerry Springer intake.

Sometimes I just want to nuke 'em, and let the cockroaches give it a try.
 

OrangeAppled

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Mar 20, 2009
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Misanthropy seems to be the result of a world that doesn't match the INFP's inner ideals. It seems fairly common for the type.

The world isn't very INFP user-friendly. The misanthropism is probably just a natural reaction to this.

Pretty much this. I feel a strange mix of caring and not caring. Sometimes the distrust is self-preservation, sometimes it's honest indifference, and sometimes it's a real distaste for and frustration with how people are.

For me, the only thing that makes sense is to try and help make sure my friends and those around me can also enjoy their brief turn at life. If at the end of my time here, even a single other person's life has been a bit easier and a bit happier thanks to me, I will die totally satisfied.
Everything else I do is just me enjoying life and filling in the time between being useful to that end.

Hmm...when I do nice things for people, it tends to be a way of fulfilling my vision of being a kind, caring person, not so much out of a feeling of caring. I like the idea of being a certain way more than I really like people. I almost do something because it's what I think I should do, and I get roped in by the empathetic feeling of "I would appreciate someone doing this for me". My real goals tend to be about me though - finding expression for myself.
 

chris09

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Also worth a mention... I don't watch the news as it can make me misanthropic. Perhaps I've just managed to hide away from a lot of the bad stuff.
Ignorance is bliss, you know? lol
 

TickTock

Mud and rain and chaos...
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Also worth a mention... I don't watch the news as it can make me misanthropic. Perhaps I've just managed to hide away from a lot of the bad stuff.
Ignorance is bliss, you know? lol

Same. Last time I watched the news I was heavily reminded why I avoid it.
 

Udog

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^ Indeed. News focuses on the bad stuff because that's what provides the drama and ratings. Plus, news is owned by corporations that desire to push their own interests.

However, I find NPR to be a pretty solid, level headed source of news.
 

Biaxident

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I have CNN as my home page. I usually glance at it quickly, and go somewhere else. Before all the crap can sink in.

Although, occasionally I see something of interest that isn't too dark.
 

sgtmac_46

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Jul 2, 2008
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I thought we were supposed to be all empathetic and what not.

Why then do I have a streak of Misanthropy in my character?

Most misanthropes are frustrated idealists.......that's part and parcel of being a misanthrope. Why would someone hate humanity if it wasn't disappointed with humanity not living up to their ideals? Misanthropy is an NF phenomenon.

As the saying goes, life is a comedy for those who think and a tragedy for those who feel.......that goes double for INFP's and INFJ's.

The reality is that ENTP's aren't misanthropes because everything to us is pure sarcastic comedy.......what's to be bitter and angry about? People don't disappoint me, because I expect people to be exactly what they are.......damn entertaining and I love them for it! ;)
 

Litvyak

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Oct 5, 2008
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I'm more misanthropic than anybody I know around my age, except for my INTP friend.

I can see these tendencies in INFPs though, it usually manifests itself in a struggle between helping people and being utterly disappointed in them (perhaps because they don't fit in the ideals of the INFP?).
One more thing: Fi identifies authenticity, and most people play games or roles, which may confuse or disappoint the openly caring NFPs. Methinks.
 

Lacey

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Jan 3, 2009
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One more thing: Fi identifies authenticity, and most people play games or roles, which may confuse or disappoint the openly caring NFPs. Methinks.

Yep. Pretty much.

There's nothing else in the whole world that can make me hate people more than fake-ness and dishonesty. That's the number 1 thing that gets under my skin...
 
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