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[ENFP] ENFP are we annoying? Be honest. What do you really think?

Nico_D

The Lost One
Joined
Mar 13, 2015
Messages
136
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
I love my ENFP's but damn, they can be a pain in the ass.

The question is, how does an INFJ who values connection and presence befriend with an ENFP who doesn't take that kind of things as seriously? Do you just keep calling them despite they never call you back? Asking them the same questions over and over until you get an answer - or does that frustrate the ENFP?
 

ceecee

Coolatta® Enjoyer
Joined
Apr 22, 2008
Messages
15,908
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
8w9
The question is, how does an INFJ who requires connection and presence befriend with an ENFP who doesn't take that kind of things as seriously?

I think an INFJ has to be firm about ENFP's tendency to keep things ultra light and make your own needs known. You have to get their attention first and you'll have to tell them that you need connection and presence, probably more than once. It's your call whether you can do that or not but I don't feel they are are totally oblivious to these needs in others. They want connection and presence too but they also want the fun, the flirty, the feels good, man, all at the same time.
 

aanule

New member
Joined
Apr 12, 2015
Messages
190
MBTI Type
ENFP
The question is, how does an INFJ who values connection and presence befriend with an ENFP who doesn't take that kind of things as seriously? Do you just keep calling them despite they never call you back? Asking them the same questions over and over until you get an answer - or does that frustrate the ENFP?

Catch their attention. If I'm interested in a person, they get my full attention... To the detriment of most everything else, in fact. It's very much like the projects I take on, hot and heavy at first and then it wanes.

If you can keep my interest, you have potential as a partner (not sure that's what you're looking for)... If you can't, into the friend pile you go to be picked back up when I remember I miss you, or you pester me enough to make plans (which I absolutely don't mind).
 

BadOctopus

Suave y Fuerte
Joined
Oct 9, 2014
Messages
3,232
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w4
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I like ENFPs, but I've learned not to lend them any of my belongings, because they always forget to give them back. Always.

My ENFP best friend has even taken stuff I lent her to Goodwill. :fpalm:
 

aanule

New member
Joined
Apr 12, 2015
Messages
190
MBTI Type
ENFP
I like ENFPs, but I've learned not to lend them any of my belongings, because they always forget to give them back. Always.

My ENFP best friend has even taken stuff I lent her to Goodwill. :fpalm:

Also guilty. I know what belongs to who, just actually remembering to return anything never happens. If you show up asking for it, I'll have it though!
 

Rambling

New member
Joined
Jun 6, 2014
Messages
401
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Catch their attention. If I'm interested in a person, they get my full attention... To the detriment of most everything else, in fact. It's very much like the projects I take on, hot and heavy at first and then it wanes.

If you can keep my interest, you have potential as a partner (not sure that's what you're looking for)... If you can't, into the friend pile you go to be picked back up when I remember I miss you, or you pester me enough to make plans (which I absolutely don't mind).

And of course, there's the aura of mystery which emanates naturally from an INTJ in the presence of an ENFP...
 

aanule

New member
Joined
Apr 12, 2015
Messages
190
MBTI Type
ENFP
And of course, there's the aura of mystery which emanates naturally from an INTJ in the presence of an ENFP...

You mean the aloofness?? Good lord, it drives me mad. Just be straightforward, god damn it... There's only so much testing you can do before I just start ignoring you altogether because you're too much trouble.
 

Rambling

New member
Joined
Jun 6, 2014
Messages
401
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
5w6
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
You mean the aloofness?? Good lord, it drives me mad. Just be straightforward, god damn it... There's only so much testing you can do before I just start ignoring you altogether because you're too much trouble.

No, I didn't mean aloofness. I'm pretty straightforward, I think. The only real problem I have with ENFP in real life is that they'd get all my secrets out of me in record quick time if I don't keep some measure of distance.
 

aanule

New member
Joined
Apr 12, 2015
Messages
190
MBTI Type
ENFP
No, I didn't mean aloofness. I'm pretty straightforward, I think. The only real problem I have with ENFP in real life is that they'd get all my secrets out of me in record quick time if I don't keep some measure of distance.

Maybe that's it... But I've known some super aloof INTJ's I had to puzzle information out of, like they were making me work for the privilege of learning about them. Defense mechanism makes sense.
 

ceecee

Coolatta® Enjoyer
Joined
Apr 22, 2008
Messages
15,908
MBTI Type
INTJ
Enneagram
8w9
You mean the aloofness?? Good lord, it drives me mad. Just be straightforward, god damn it... There's only so much testing you can do before I just start ignoring you altogether because you're too much trouble.

When I say GIVE...ME...MY...SHIT...BACK, my ENFP's start crying and asking why I'm so blunt and and straightforward. :shrug: This is also why I go :huh: when the say we are the best romantic match. They get pissed when I won't reveal secrets too and that has nothing to do with testing. Sometimes they cry about that too.
 

Nico_D

The Lost One
Joined
Mar 13, 2015
Messages
136
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
If you can keep my interest, you have potential as a partner (not sure that's what you're looking for)... If you can't, into the friend pile you go to be picked back up when I remember I miss you, or you pester me enough to make plans (which I absolutely don't mind).

I'm getting a new friend who says he's an ENFP. We have extremely much in common except how we differently we concentrate on the social exchange (sorry, I hope that sentence makes any sense...) I'd discuss more often and more in length but he seems constantly to be on the fly. Restlessness. But we have huge respect towards each other - or so I feel - but whereas I think he trusts in it and believes it will hold even though we wouldn't communicate for weeks to come, I see it as faltering and uncertain. I know, I know, it's mostly me.

Isn't that kind of fucked up if one has to keep up the interest instead of both showing interest toward each other?
 

chubber

failed poetry slam career
Joined
Oct 18, 2013
Messages
4,413
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
I like ENFPs, but I've learned not to lend them any of my belongings, because they always forget to give them back. Always.

My ENFP best friend has even taken stuff I lent her to Goodwill. :fpalm:

Still waiting on my plastic Tupperware, cardigan, spoons...
 

Kensei

New member
Joined
Mar 30, 2015
Messages
282
MBTI Type
ESTP
Enneagram
7w8
Instinctual Variant
sx
The only issue I have with ENFP's, especially type 8's is that they are too freaking awesome to bear. Like seriously, every ENFP I meet blows my mind hard enough to rupture my skull. ENFP 4w3 women are amazing, and I also don't mind 2w3's or even 7w8's. My favorite ENFP of all time is... Me haha I'll bet you would've guessed that. Joking. I'm not that arrogant :p. and btw, for all people who say ENFP's are flaky and overemotional, an ENFP 8 would've punched out anyone that considered them weak like that, but then again, ENFP 8's are so rare, it's basically like trying to find a grain of sand in a sea of ice.
 

chubber

failed poetry slam career
Joined
Oct 18, 2013
Messages
4,413
MBTI Type
INTP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
The only issue I have with ENFP's, especially type 8's is that they are too freaking awesome to bear. Like seriously, every ENFP I meet blows my mind hard enough to rupture my skull. ENFP 4w3 women are amazing, and I also don't mind 2w3's or even 7w8's. My favorite ENFP of all time is... Me haha I'll bet you would've guessed that. Joking. I'm not that arrogant :p. and btw, for all people who say ENFP's are flaky and overemotional, an ENFP 8 would've punched out anyone that considered them weak like that, but then again, ENFP 8's are so rare, it's basically like trying to find a grain of sand in a sea of ice.

You lie, we already have one of those
 

Kensei

New member
Joined
Mar 30, 2015
Messages
282
MBTI Type
ESTP
Enneagram
7w8
Instinctual Variant
sx
Really? So I'm not the only ENFP 8 in the world? :p I'd like to meet this guy. So is this kindred spirit really that emotional and cry likely of a person? Or is he just full of anger towards unsympathetic people?
You lie, we already have one of those
 

BluRoses

New member
Joined
Oct 16, 2014
Messages
155
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
2w3
ENFP's are generally very charming and charismatic (even "dazzling" at times). They are very lovable over all.

That being said...I am divorced from an ENFP. Haha.
I would say the most annoying thing is possibly that they can be drama queens...also very unorganized, and can go on and ON with a story. ENFP's generally lack brevity.

Overall, still friends with my X...that must be a sign of awesomeness on one or both of our parts! :wink:
 
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