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[ENFP] ENFP are we annoying? Be honest. What do you really think?

Charmed Justice

Nickle Iron Silicone
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Jul 22, 2009
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MBTI Type
INFJ
I look at it as.. everyone is annoying, people who let themselves show more will have more people think they are annoying (which is why people say ESFP is more annoying than ENFP). If I go introvert and don't put myself out there, there is less change I will be annoying.

I think it just goes with the "being very open" ENFP thing to allow yourself to be seen as annoying.
You find out how annoying the quiet types and the introverts are after they've wrapped you around their finger and sucked you dry in.:tongue: How fair is that?
 

hermeticdancer

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So, I've posted this list before, but I am posting it again and sticking by it! (It's been revised though.)

How are ENFP's annoying?


ENFP's will do almost anything (or say anything) to please others.

Oh Really?

I personally could care less if I please everyone. Just have a select few friends.
When younger I cared more.
 

Thalassa

Permabanned
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So far people have said from direct quotes taken from your comments:
the following about ENFP's

"Get hurt over things don't matter" and become "defensive"
"ENFPs are flaky."
"Ignore what I share and try to tell me what I'm "really" thinking and feeling."
Can be Dogmatic, when has "strong beliefs"
"Have trouble keeping promises"
Can "lie"
I hate it when they are "Absentminded"
"Doesn’t listen to what I say"
Can be "moody"
"Constantly talking"
"Loud"
Overly sensitive
"Distorted" view of reality

I think we have a working diagnosis for ADHD here guys. Break out the Adderall!
(ENFP's can use humor as a defense mechanism because they expect to be humiliated)


ADHD? No, sounds a bit more like bipolar disorder.
 

hermeticdancer

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ADHD? No, sounds a bit more like bipolar disorder.

Or maybe OCD!
or, who cares
:headphne:

It's informative and fun to hear feedback about what other people are complaining about. I take it with a grain of salt, mind you.
People are f-up in their own ways.
What other people are complaining about is stereotypical. That may have some truth to it.
I don't think its ADD, or OCD, or whatever, maybe, a light combo of both. :newwink: nothing meds cant handle.
But The other types are so screwed up its unbelievable. I am just happy that I can be who I am. I love myself! :hug:
 

Poki

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You find out how annoying the quiet types and the introverts are after they've wrapped you around their finger and sucked you dry in.:tongue: How fair is that?

Are you saying I am annoying :harhar:

Here is what I noticed about ENFPs in general. They can be frustrating sometimes with their stubbornness of what matters to them and why. The frustration is not that what they want isnt important, but more that in certain cases it is not required and they wont listen to reason within this one context, that this one time they can let go.
 

wolfy

awsm
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Messages
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You find out how annoying the quiet types and the introverts are after they've wrapped you around their finger and sucked you dry in.:tongue: How fair is that?

Hey! I like to think you'll find out how great I am after I let you in.
 

Poki

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Or maybe OCD!
or, who cares
:headphne:

It's informative and fun to hear feedback about what other people are complaining about. I take it with a grain of salt, mind you.
People are f-up in their own ways.
What other people are complaining about is stereotypical. That may have some truth to it.
I don't think its ADD, or OCD, or whatever, maybe, a light combo of both. :newwink: nothing meds cant handle.
But The other types are so screwed up its unbelievable. I am just happy that I can be who I am. I love myself! :hug:

I noticed that P types seem to be more accepting internally of the split personality that we all have. Where as J types seem to fight this split personality because its not "proper", this other side is not what we are supposed to be.
 

Totenkindly

@.~*virinaĉo*~.@
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Jennifer said:
I thought the ENFPs would flex a lot more, but the friendships actually have been irrevocably damaged by how they would just basically tell me my own feelings and thoughts couldn't be true because they couldn't accept they were true.

That's not really what you feel, Jennifer.

Just saw this...

... was this a JOKE???? :steam:

btw, i don't think u really met those enfp's, they were just a figment of your.... ( IM JUST KIDDING HAHAHA)

ANOTHER JOKE???? :steam: :steam: :steam:


;)

ENFP or no ENFP, how the hell do you have a conversation with someone like that? :huh:

You don't, actually.

I don't have a friendship with any of them anymore, we stopped talking due to the irreconcilable differences and just never got back together. I feel a little bad because I hate losing a connection, technically; but the feelings of violation and frustration were far worse.

I think we have a working diagnosis for ADHD here guys. Break out the Adderall!

Meh none of the ones I know seem very ADD to me.

I'll say too that the bulk of the "unruly ones" who pissed me off were tied to conservative religious value systems -- it's like the beliefs easily become dogma and they can't see beyond them, all Ne is used to do is look for at-best-merely-correlated support points to justify the internalized belief system.
 

Poki

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I'll say too that the bulk of the "unruly ones" who pissed me off were tied to conservative religious value systems -- it's like the beliefs easily become dogma and they can't see beyond them, all Ne is used to do is look for at-best-merely-correlated support points to justify the internalized belief system.

I think its the belief system that they feel like they must be part of. Its the NeTe that looks for support points to justify the internalized belief system.

You can see this in ISTJs when they get stressed and turn to NeTe ;)
 
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Hey guys. I am in trouble with typing one ENP right. Is it typically for ENFP to talk very much and very much about himself/herself? Well, I know one, who is just talking about herself. Very charismatic, and I like her, but I don't feel a direct connection when we meet - it's more like a monolog.

And, second question. I am no american, and I tried to translate the word "flaky". Can you tell me about some situations, you experienced with ENFPs. Maybe especially about ENFPs, you see the first time.
 

Laurie

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Flaky = not following through, missing things, forgetting things.
 

wolfy

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All the enfp I know on here and irl have been great. Not annoying at all. Good thing about enfp is they always give you something to play off.  
 

Poki

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Hey guys. I am in trouble with typing one ENP right. Is it typically for ENFP to talk very much and very much about himself/herself? Well, I know one, who is just talking about herself. Very charismatic, and I like her, but I don't feel a direct connection - it's more like a monolog.

And, second question. I am no american, and I tried to translate the word "flaky". Can you tell me about some situations, you experienced with ENFPs. Maybe especially about ENFPs, you see the first time.

It seems like they do like to talk about themselves. What connection are you expecting? He/She is probably excited and just has a lot to say. Take this as a chance to learn about them.

To me flaky means that they dont do what they say they are going to, change plans, dont show up, etc. From my experience if you listen and understand they will let you know before hand that they are gonna "flake" and why.
 

Siúil a Rúin

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ENFPs are of course loveable :wubbie:

"Annoyance" is one of the few things that annoys me. It seems to be plastered everywhere online. I guess what I don't care for about it is its condescending tone. I am annoyed by mosquitos or tape stuck to my shoe. I realize people experience a great deal of social pain in their life which is worth addressing and resolving, etc. Excluding those deeper issues, I think that "annoyance" is a self-inflicted problem. Those who suffer from it are generating and receiving karma in a single fell swoop. And now I am less annoyed by it.
 
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Yeah, excited. That can meet it.

The connection I mean is the connection I have with some NTPs: Talking together about a project and academic facts. The difference is, that she's talking in patterns like

- "I have ..."
- "I can do...."
- "I like ...."
(and then facts are following)

and the NTPs are talking in form of

- "it's interesting that ..."
- "wooooow, cool. That means, ...?"

With NTPs I feel "WE are interested", with this (probably) ENFP I can just see, that she is interested in herself.

Question: Is that normal for ENFPs? Or is it a normal view for NTPs to ENFP?
 

Charmed Justice

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Hey! I like to think you'll find out how great I am after I let you in.
And that too. ;)

Are you saying I am annoying :harhar:
No! That was just me being annoying.:alttongue:


I do agree that the more open you are, the more open you are to the ridicule and judgment of others, up front. I kinda like it that way though. Saves lots of time and confusion. I'd like to think that people know what they're getting into with me.

Here is what I noticed about ENFPs in general. They can be frustrating sometimes with their stubbornness of what matters to them and why. The frustration is not that what they want isnt important, but more that in certain cases it is not required and they wont listen to reason within this one context, that this one time they can let go.
Hmm, can you give an example?

Hey guys. I am in trouble with typing one ENP right. Is it typically for ENFP to talk very much and very much about himself/herself? Well, I know one, who is just talking about herself. Very charismatic, and I like her, but I don't feel a direct connection when we meet - it's more like a monolog.
Depends. What's she saying about herself? Are you just getting to know her?
 

Totenkindly

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I think its the belief system that they feel like they must be part of. Its the NeTe that looks for support points to justify the internalized belief system. You can see this in ISTJs when they get stressed and turn to NeTe ;)

Yeah.

Naturally an Ne+Fi person will use Fi to help shape the connections that Ne makes... just like Ne+Ti will create connections using more literal/natural law (sort of like Wile E. Coyote style logic, it's all "sensible" according to the laws of nature).

I think ENTP can seem sort of insane -- mad scientist -- when Ti is off or extremely rigid, and so Ne is fettered and bound to it and thus distorted by it. Ne becomes enslaved to Ti's desires, rather than Ti "giving advice" to where Ne goes.

Likewise, depending on how strong and how "rational" the Fi is, the Ne can become completely muddled and enslaved into supporting the rigid Fi valueset.

The healthy ENFP's are wonderful, they explore everything and merely let Fi guide where they go, to inform their steps, rather than twisting Ne to justify Fi's rigid demands all while still retaining an extroverted energy flow. The extroverted energy flow coupled with Te skill also can result in someone who can be domineering and demanding and rigid/lopping off corners to force something to happen a certain way. Not a great combo.
 

SolitaryWalker

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Yeah.

Naturally an Ne+Fi person will use Fi to help shape the connections that Ne makes... just like Ne+Ti will create connections using more literal/natural law (sort of like Wile E. Coyote style logic, it's all "sensible" according to the laws of nature).

I think ENTP can seem sort of insane -- mad scientist -- when Ti is off or extremely rigid, and so Ne is fettered and bound to it and thus distorted by it. Ne becomes enslaved to Ti's desires, rather than Ti "giving advice" to where Ne goes.

Likewise, depending on how strong and how "rational" the Fi is, the Ne can become completely muddled and enslaved into supporting the rigid Fi valueset.

The healthy ENFP's are wonderful, they explore everything and merely let Fi guide where they go, to inform their steps, rather than twisting Ne to justify Fi's rigid demands all while still retaining an extroverted energy flow. The extroverted energy flow coupled with Te skill also can result in someone who can be domineering and demanding and rigid/lopping off corners to force something to happen a certain way. Not a great combo.


Purely theoretical point: If you have a type where Ne is dominant and Ti is auxiliary, why is it the case that when this type becomes unhealthy Ne becomes subordinate to Ti? It seems to me that the scenario would make a lot more sense if it was the other way around: primary functions are dominant and the auxiliary are subordinated.

From a purely typological standpoint, I'd think if an unhealthy ENP was given full freedom to be true to his or her natural tendencies, he or she would be guided by the output of Ne and use the auxiliary introverted judgment to give him or herself an affirmative judgment in favor of the demands of the dominant Ne function. It does seem to be the case that you're onto something here, as you mentioned, the auxiliary Introverted Judging function seems rigid and demanding. However, I don't see any reason why it should be rigid and demanding in defense of its own output rather than the defense of the output of its master-function: Ne.

In other words, you're absolutely right that in this case the Ti and Fi can be terribly rigid or demanding (for example, the case of a mad scientist), but it demands support not for its own interests, but for those associated with Ne. Consider your example of a mad scientist who seems to fit the unhealthy ENTP image that you're describing. A person of this persona is almost never seen as a very dispassionate scholar who is concerned first and foremost with logical analysis, nor is he a systematic thinker. Hence, the attributes associated with somebody who is guided first and foremost by Ti are not descriptive of his habits of thought.

In other words, he is nothing like a logician or a mathematician who may be very rigid, yet dispassionate and logically consistent. The mad scientist often makes wild speculations that almost nobody can understand or justify. His motives are far from dispassionate. On that note it seems far more plausible to say that this person is inspired by motives associated with Intuition rather than Thinking, and he certainly incorporates an element of Feeling into his disquisitions. If he was primarily relying on Thinking, Feeling would have been greatly suppressed, but that certainly isn't the case here.



---------------------------------------------------------
However, I think you've gone wrong altogether by using the typological analysis to describe an unhealthy ENP. The way an unhealthy ENP would behave in daily scenarios would heavily depend on his or her circumstances. For instance, if he or she works for a corporation, regardless of how much he'd like to act like a mad scientist, he simply would not have a chance to.

Although if this person does have an opportunity to be true to his natural dispositions, the typological analysis provided above applies.
 
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