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View Poll Results: IRL, what's your level of expressiveness of your problems/feelings?

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  • I openly express to nobody, or only if prodded by certain people.

    32 31.37%
  • I openly express to a select few close friends &/or family members.

    56 54.90%
  • I openly express to most of my friends &/or family.

    4 3.92%
  • I openly express to anyone who might offer me some consolation.

    5 4.90%
  • I am not INFP, but I want to vote.

    5 4.90%
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Results 21 to 30 of 54

  1. #21
    Senior Member The Outsider's Avatar
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    I never express anything to anyone.
    I'm serious.

  2. #22
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    ^This.

    Some people who know me have called me "secretive" on occasion. That's a weird thing to hear someone say about you.

  3. #23
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    I tend to follow a very wishy-washy/touchy-feely sense I have about someone. I enjoy emotional intimacy and find that close bonds are the most fulfilling. I have a lot to fear, but I also know I am prone to bouts of depression and lonliness without sharing with someone. You can't gain anything without risking anything.

    If I feel they would be receptive to what I am saying then I really don't have an issue talking about it. I usually feel around this person for common threads of interest, thought, or issues.

    I am careful though because if they are receptive, which I don't feel most people are at heart, then I become skittish. I fear I will say the wrong thing, somehow, and lose a potentially meaningful connection by saying too much too soon. I often worry I will say something that overloads the other person and they back off without a second thought.

    I tend to be an intense personality that is overly serious a lot of the time. So I often fear the worst.

  4. #24
    Junior Member FaithBW's Avatar
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    The number of people I truly open up to, I can count on one hand and have fingers left over. Even with these people, there is no one person who I am 100% open with, not even my DH or my mom. I think a lot, no most, people are judgmental and I don't have time for that. If I get judgmental vibes from you, I will shut myself off instantly.

  5. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by FaithBW View Post
    The number of people I truly open up to, I can count on one hand and have fingers left over. Even with these people, there is no one person who I am 100% open with, not even my DH or my mom. I think a lot, no most, people are judgmental and I don't have time for that. If I get judgmental vibes from you, I will shut myself off instantly.
    I have the same thing. I will sometimes automatically start ignoring you.

  6. #26
    Member lua's Avatar
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    I don't enjoy small talk - at all - so if somebody tries to converse with me (I'm talking strangers here) I generally give them my attention and respond honestly and thoroughly.

    Stranger: So, this weather! Finally snowed.
    Me: Yes, it's so lovely. I went out the first night it fell to spend time with the snowflakes. I love the sensation of breathing the crisp, cold air! How do you like it - walking in it, driving in it? (more questions, et cetera..)
    Stranger: *runs away*

    Note: this is only in a place where I'm comfortable and feel positive energy: almost exclusively bookstores. If I'm in a crowded mall or a supermarket my face is held down so far it's between my breasts.

    That said, I NEVER communicate my problems or personal life (experiences rather than random thoughts and feelings) to anyone other than my family (only when provoked), one friend (only when provoked), and my poor, poor cat.

  7. #27
    Junior Member teacups&cupcakes's Avatar
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    I used to express my problems and feelings to a few of my friends but these days I just feel so different from them and they usually just brush off what I say as they think it is weird.

    Now I just write down my problems and feelings in my journal and then occasionally tell them to my family.

    Yeah... great life.

  8. #28
    Senor Membrane
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    I see a lot on insinuations on this board that INFPs seem to whine to whoever will listen.
    Not true in my case.

    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    Maybe this is due to that fact that some people use online anonymity to vent safely (true of myself anyway).

    While I can be whiny like anyone, IRL, it's with a very select few people that I am extremely close to. Casual friends hardly know much about me at all aside from the external, and most people complain I keep a wall up. Example: if I am dating someone, no one knows about it. If they do, and it ends, I don't talk about it with female friends like most women do. People try and pry this out of me and I shut them down fast.
    All true for me. Except that if someone really wants to know, I'll usually give them something.

    I'd say I have a couple of people who might have some idea of what's going on with me. I don't know why it is like that, I mean I'm not secretive on purpose. I was living with a bunch of people and they could easily see what I was doing (basically nothing, heh...) and it was ok with me, even though not all of them were the kind of people I would have shared something with.

    The people I whine to are the ones who will not try to help me, but listen and understand that it is important for me to vent.

    Edit: I came up with one reason for the secrecy. Just a couple of days ago I was opening up to a friend and I remember that I thought of it as an overreaction as I didn't want to pour my shit on someone else's lap. I told her that and she was like it's ok, there's nothing wrong if it makes her to worry about me. So, yeah, that is one thing. I really would like it if people would have easier lives, and my troubles should not be theirs to carry. So, in a way, if you are very close to me, I will also make your life harder...

  9. #29
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lua View Post
    That said, I NEVER communicate my problems or personal life (experiences rather than random thoughts and feelings) to anyone other than my family (only when provoked), one friend (only when provoked), and my poor, poor cat.
    Aw, the poor cats....always stuck with the burden of our problems
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  10. #30
    Senior Member Kastor's Avatar
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    With my friends that I'm not as close to I usually have a sort of mask that I wear. Around them I usually try to keep up the the impression that I'm usually happy and good humored. I can recall a few times at school when I was really upset about something personal, but I didn't want them to think anything was wrong or to shatter their usual perception of me. So when I was on the brink of tears I'd excuse myself and go sob in the bathroom.

    Around my close friends I'm much more open, but not to the extent that they wish I was.
    [SIGPIC]http://i206.photobucket.com/albums/bb37/KamikazePigeonOnFire/untitled-39.jpg[/SIGPIC]

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