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View Poll Results: IRL, what's your level of expressiveness of your problems/feelings?

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  • I openly express to nobody, or only if prodded by certain people.

    32 31.37%
  • I openly express to a select few close friends &/or family members.

    56 54.90%
  • I openly express to most of my friends &/or family.

    4 3.92%
  • I openly express to anyone who might offer me some consolation.

    5 4.90%
  • I am not INFP, but I want to vote.

    5 4.90%
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  1. #11
    Member nzAShadow's Avatar
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    I find it impossible to openly express to anyone, even close friends or family members. Actually especially family members.

    I used to see a counselor to help me with some issues I was having with life, after about a year of me not being able to tell her anything she finally gave up on me.

    Every time she asked me a question, I'd dance around how I really felt by telling her facts surrounding it, then when she would actually ask how I felt, my mind would lock up while I was thinking of the words to describe it.

    There is an exception, when I am going through particularly tough times, and a close friend actually prods me to talk about it, they absolutely have to do it over some instant messaging program. As mentioned above if asked in person my mind seems to lock up... but typing it out doesn't seem to have the same affect.

  2. #12
    half-nut member briochick's Avatar
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    I'm quite self aware and pretty open. If anyone has a question I'm usually willing to answer it. I figure if I'm closed off (like I used to be in my youth) I'm even less likely to ever find anyone who will love me. I'd rather suffer some pain and be open than never know if people could like me as I am.
    -Brio

    "I have never in my life envied a human being who led an easy life; I have envied a great many people who led difficult lives and led them well."
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  3. #13
    Member reality.ensues's Avatar
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    There is one person, and only one, that I can open up to. Problem is, I'm in love with that person, so even then I have to be careful about which feelings I reveal.

    I get by, though. Slowly.
    Isn't life under the sun just a crazy, crazy, crazy dream? Isn't life just a mirage of the world before the world? Why am I here and not over there? When did time begin? Where does space end? Where do you and I begin?
    INfp. Fi~Ti>Te~Ne>Si>Ni>Fe~Se
    Level 5 4w5. Screw instinctual subtypes. (Ranking: 4>9~5>6>1~2>3~7~8)
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    Signal Patterns

  4. #14
    Junior Member Sauropsidian's Avatar
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    I only openly express if I'm around really close friends at appropriate times, but since I barely have any atm, depending on how comfortable someone makes me feel, I open up, but not fully.
    4w5 sp/so/sx

  5. #15
    Head Pigeon Mad Hatter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by OrangeAppled View Post
    I see a lot on insinuations on this board that INFPs seem to whine to whoever will listen.
    Well yeah, I plead guilty in a sense. The second part is decisive though, since occasions where I think that I can do that safely are relatively rare. I picked the 'anyone' option because for me it sometimes depends more on the situation than on the person. Telling anyone though doesn't mean that I talk about such matters very often. I rarely make explicit what bothers me (though of course on this board I might be a bit different ).
    I very rarely tell my family - not that they wouldn't listen, but they focus too much on solving the problem instead of just listening to me and letting me figure it out myself.
    The most helpful conversations I have are usually with my female friends, which makes sense since my greatest problems are almost always with the opposite sex. I both like their style of conversation and their insights.
    IN SERIO FATVITAS.

    -τὸ γὰρ γράμμα ἀποκτέννει, τὸ δὲ πνεῦμα ζῳοποιεῖ-

  6. #16
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    I''m in category 4 for the most part in that I'm open about my feelings with most people. I'm a trusting person unless I get a sense from someone that I can't trust them. I'll talk in general about personal relationships with people I work with, for example. I'm friendly by nature and can talk with just about anyone but the conversation only goes so far. I reserve speaking my true mind and heart unreservedly with only a few of my closest friends.

    I don't usually whine but I don't mind whining--a man I have feelings for is, I think, an INFJ/P, and he whines a bit. But I don't hear it as complaining as much as voicing frustration because he has strong feelings about certain things, and when he meets resistance, he has to voice it. I like people who are very particular about their likes and dislikes because I can relate, and I find it endearing (or in my male friend's case, I do). When he whines I know he's just venting.

  7. #17
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    I open only to close friends, being an INFJ.

    The Mind is in essence our soul.

  8. #18
    Senior Member WoodsWoman's Avatar
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    I have to be prodded by the right person(s), though I'm learning to seek the company of those people when I know I need prodding. After it's out then I can sort through and share with others better.

  9. #19
    Senior Member Synapse's Avatar
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    I will express my feelings and problems with close friends and family, the later less applicable. Too guarded with my family to truly open up with them, its a whirlwind round them. So I let myself relax when I can with friends I trust. I express myself openly to friends who want to listen and find value in the expression too. When I learn this isn't the case I stop expressing emotionally and my problems stay my own.

  10. #20
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by William K View Post
    Hmm, looks like so far I'm the first to choose option 4, so I guess I have to explain a bit

    To me, anyone who might offer consolation means I know that person well enough to believe that he/she will be able to understand my problem. I don't seek agreement or even solutions. All I need is some understanding and a place to vent my frustrations.
    I used to do this when I was younger, as I mistakenly took the question: 'How are you' to actually mean something instead of be an empty greeting. I didn't grasp the concept behind it as I couldn't understand why you would ask a question and then not wanna hear a genuine answer. I also am principally against lying. Still cringe when I have to lie to that question.


    These days I've learned that most cannot handle what they perceive as emotional drama when answering that question truthfully. I only share with my boyfriend or, if it really spills over and people can notice my mood and I no longer have the energy to do the cover-up thing and I cannot leave, I'll explain in short to those who ask, so they don't worry unnecessarily or feel excluded. At rare occasions, usually when I'm sleepdeprived, irritated and stressed, I'll actually rant and vent publicly. I seriously try to warn people when it happens ( I can feel it coming on without being able to stop it), and try to make amends later on.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





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