I get on with NTJs very very well. Two of my best friends are NTJs and the ENFJ-NTJ dynamic can be really hilarious at times. We may get set off by the same thing, but for different reasons (Fe/Ni vs. Te/Ni). When understanding is wanted, they call me up and vent.
NTJ: "So I totally knocked that ****** down with a ****ing shovel and drove over him with my ****ing SUV!"
Me: "Did you hurl mighty taunts and spit on him while dancing on his inert body too?"
NTJ: "YES! Twenty times!"
Me: "Wow! You were being way too nice!"
NTJ: "I KNOW!"
Me: "You deserve a giant medal and some Blahnik pumps for your restraint!"
NTJ: "I love you."
LOL... that's me and Athena (ENTJ) on the phone...
But I think that the E/I split is best defined as "What function automatically takes charge the most?" In my case, Fe takes charge at least 70 to 80% of the time. It may not take strong leadership or control, but it's first. My Ni is ever present and dictating behind the scenes even when it didn't get to the forefront before Fe did.
My ENFP sister says that ENFJs have a certain aura about them that's different from INFJs. Can anyone else confirm or deny this?