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  1. #1
    Member MmmCrazy's Avatar
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    Default ENFJs: Falling out of love? Does it even happen?

    I'm still young, but it's honestly never happened to me. I've never fallen out of love with someone. I've always been the one to be dumped.

    Is this just because ENFJs hold on for dear life?

  2. #2
    Senior Member souffle's Avatar
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    I'm not ENFJ, but I am another NF!

    Falling out of love, I think, happens when you both grow as people and get to a point where the connection or love no longer exists. In the present moment that you are in love with someone, you couldn't picture falling out of love with them because you are still your current self, that loves them, as they are now . You can't predict how either of you are going to change in the future, which might affect your love for them.

    That's my two cents! I was going to develop it further and create more links to the OP, but now I have to go out. Bye bye!

  3. #3
    Ginkgo
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    Love is mutual appreciation. It is forgiveness. It is oneness.

    I have loved in the past, but it always crashed and burned. Maybe someday I'll find someone.

    souffle pretty much nailed it on the head.

  4. #4
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    I was dumped by an ENFJ who said he 'loved me more as a sister'

    Load of BS, I doubt he actually knew what love was, so I doubt he fell out of love (he was an ENFJ gone bad)
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  5. #5
    Ginkgo
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    I was dumped by an ENFJ who said he 'loved me more as a sister'

    Load of BS, I doubt he actually knew what love was, so I doubt he fell out of love (he was an ENFJ gone bad)
    That's really messed up. I must say. You should have told him that even if he did have a sister, he wouldn't love her. :steam:

  6. #6
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post
    That's really messed up. I must say. You should have told him that even if he did have a sister, he wouldn't love her. :steam:
    He just wanted to get rid of me in the most sympathetic way and technically he said that he had come to view me more as a sister than a girlfriend. He was a dick anyways. His motto was: cheating is an art.'Nuff said.
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





    "Harm none, do as ye will”

  7. #7
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
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    To Mystic: *nice*

    To Amargith: Tell me, was that the same reason why you were attracted to him? The bad boy image?

    Not a judgement or anything on you, I'm just always curious about that sort of thing. Makes me want to dawn a cowskin (leather jacket) and ride a hog (motorcycle).
    Love is the point.

  8. #8
    Senior Member nynesneg's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MmmCrazy View Post
    I'm still young, but it's honestly never happened to me. I've never fallen out of love with someone. I've always been the one to be dumped.

    Is this just because ENFJs hold on for dear life?
    Hmm... Good question. For me I've noticed a few things.

    I make friends easily, so when I'm single there are plenty of guys to choose from and I'm very picky. It takes ALOT for me to get excited over someone. Once in a relationship, I am very doting/loving, although I try hard not to be "needy".

    Relationship 1 - Very close emotionally over several years. A falling out because I needed more time communication and he couldn't give it. (an introvert)

    Relationship 2 - Found out after the fact he had been seeing someone else for the second half of our relationship. I went waay out of my way to try to make the relationship work, but he was a jerk.

    Relationship 3 - Didn't work out very well, he kinda intimated me. Still haunts me as almost my perfect ideal of a partner, excluding his communication skills which sucked. I suppose I tried too much in this relationship too. He ended it.

    Relationship 4 - Current bf, been together a year and a half. Friendship evolved into a relationship. I will probably be the one to break it up eventually, but right now we enjoy being together. In his words, he's "needy" and "cuddle whore", so perhaps it suits me well on a communication/physical touch level.


    As for your original question. I wouldn't say I hang on for dear life unless I'm head over heels for someone. I could definitely fall "out of love" if the guy is a being a jerk, although I still will deeply care about them as a person even after we break up. But I am very easy going in relationships and rarely argue or expect the other person to change. It's not uncommon for the guy to tell me later he really misses me and can't find any girl with my personality and like me etc...

  9. #9
    The Black Knight Domino's Avatar
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    Both of the guys I was in love with left me. Long story. It was social pressure in both cases. (Nice) To this day, I still care about them both in a way that makes me angry at myself. I love hard and don't let go. That's why these things hurt me so badly, especially since I'm so cautious entering into such an arrangement in the first place.
    eNFJ 4w3 sx/so 468 tritype
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    EII-Fi subtype, Ethical/Empath, Delta/Beta
    RLUEI, Choleric/Melancholic
    Inquistive/Limbic
    AIS Holland code
    Researcher: VDI-P
    Dramatic>Sensitive>Serious

  10. #10
    Senior Member JivinJeffJones's Avatar
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    I've only known one confirmed ENFJ. She held a torch for the same guy for almost a decade, with no encouragement. In the end she had to move to a different continent to get over it. Which she did, and was married within 18 months. All the other suspected ENFJs I know married quite young (very early 20s), with few (no more than 2) if any previous relationships.

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