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  1. #11
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    Self-acceptance and forming authentic relationships are a huge part of any kind of 'real' self-improvement, I think for human beings in general, but even more so for an F.

    "Better" and "worse" become more and more false categories to me as I grow older. A lot of what Athenian says is true, but please don't slit your wrists.
    But how much self acceptance is really good for you? surely there are some things one should never just accept about themselves?
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

    Berb's Johari Berb's Nohari

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post
    And reminiscing in the inevitability of death gives one an excuse to never try and make something of their life. To never inspire those around them. To never help those in need.
    It makes some people more thankful for what/who they have...the awareness of death makes some people live life more fully, more authentically.

    I'm really sorry you're going through this.

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    Self-acceptance and forming authentic relationships are a huge part of any kind of 'real' self-improvement, I think for human beings in general, but even more so for an F.

    "Better" and "worse" become more and more false categories to me as I grow older. A lot of what Athenian says is true, but please don't slit your wrists.
    I won't, don't worry.

    I hope you aren't misconstruing my use of the phrase "self acceptance" as something akin to "self acknowledgment".

    Self-acknowledgment should be put first and foremost before self-improvement or self-acceptance.

  4. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by BerberElla View Post
    But how much self acceptance is really good for you? surely there are some things one should never just accept about themselves?
    I think you misunderstand what I mean by 'acceptance.' I don't mean that I think every single thing about myself is wonderful and perfect, but I accept that I am human and therefore flawed and will never be "perfect." I am deserving of love just as I am, and so are other people.

  5. #15
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    I think you misunderstand what I mean by 'acceptance.' I don't mean that I think every single thing about myself is wonderful and perfect, but I accept that I am human and therefore flawed and will never be "perfect." I am deserving of love just as I am, and so are other people.
    I agree, but as a god damn perfectionist that's really hard to just accept lol I find my version of accepting myself is more like depressed resignation that these flaws I hate may actually be part of me until the day I die.

    I get what you are saying now though.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

    Berb's Johari Berb's Nohari

  6. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystic Tater View Post
    I won't, don't worry.

    I hope you aren't misconstruing my use of the phrase "self acceptance" as something akin to "self acknowledgment".

    Self-acknowledgment should be put first and foremost before self-improvement or self-acceptance.
    It's good to do things that you feel "better" yourself. It's great to have goals and to have something to look forward to. I am not disagreeing with that at all. I'm not suggesting you sit around and do nothing and be nihilistic.

    I'm suggesting that you are a worthy human being even without "self-improvement."

    Where ever you go, there you are. That's a Buddhist saying. I'm not trying to be vague - I'm just trying to illustrate that no matter how many external goals you set for yourself, you will still be you. There's another old saying that when you run away, the thing you're running away from is the first thing you pack.

  7. #17
    Intriguing.... Quinlan's Avatar
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    Perfect is overrated, so is idealism.
    Act your age not your enneagram number.

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  8. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Quinlan View Post
    Perfect is overrated, so is idealism.
    This is why I love SPs.

  9. #19
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    This is why I love SPs.
    Because they tell you a part of you is over-rated?

    Idealist opens thread, gets told to accept themself, then gets told idealism is over-rated.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

    Berb's Johari Berb's Nohari

  10. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by BerberElla View Post
    Because they tell you a part of you is over-rated?

    Idealist opens thread, gets told to accept themself, then gets told idealism is over-rated.
    In a way they're both true, though. Yeah, idealists should accept ourselves for being idealists and continue to cherish our ideals. But sometimes it's also important to remember that there's a goodness is what is.


    I see it less as a dichotomy and more as a paradoxical balance.

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