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  1. #31
    Seriously Delirious Udog's Avatar
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    A theory that has popped into my head:

    ENFJ males tend to want a calming influence that they can safety call home.

    ENFJ females want a challenging influence that will help push them away from the calmness.

    That may be 100% BS, but I'm throwing it out there because this "Submit Reply" button isn't going to click itself.

    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    You wanna go, big boy?? *slaps hands together* C'mere! Lemme hug your neck!
    Yes, please do come closer.

  2. #32
    Senior Member Heinel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkPiranha View Post
    A word to the wise: Never use your family members as a template or base for judgment in romantic relationships.
    I wasn't really thinking about relational communication when I said that. We can talk, never argued, but we cannot relate. When I said communication I was talking about it on a more basic level, the starting point. It's the same with other ENFJs I met too.

    I think this is the issue, from the get go we assumed different things, and tuned to different channels. It is very possible for people to work together to fix misunderstandings, and busy themselves with similar interests, but that is the case for all kinds of people regardless of type. I do not doubt the chemistry between NFs and SPs, but unless jumping through hoops are part of the draw, I do not see how ISTP / ENFJ should be recommended.
    Check out my blog: http://OrnateRitual.com

  3. #33
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    I really neither know nor read the OP

    The hot type?
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
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    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
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  4. #34
    Habitual Fi LineStepper JocktheMotie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EcK View Post
    I really neither know nor read the OP

    The hot type?
    The hot type is reserved for INTPs, thank you very much! You ENTPs drew the "guy/girl next to you at the motor vehicle department" type, sorry about that...



  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    A theory that has popped into my head:

    ENFJ males tend to want a calming influence that they can safety call home.

    ENFJ females want a challenging influence that will help push them away from the calmness.

    That may be 100% BS, but I'm throwing it out there because this "Submit Reply" button isn't going to click itself.



    Yes, please do come closer.
    +1

  6. #36
    The Memes Justify the End EcK's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JocktheMotie View Post
    The hot type is reserved for INTPs, thank you very much! You ENTPs drew the "guy/girl next to you at the motor vehicle department" type, sorry about that...
    Hotties need driving licences too
    Expression of the post modern paradox : "For the love of god, religions are so full of shit"

    Theory is always superseded by Fact...
    ... In theory.

    “I’d hate to die twice. It’s so boring.”
    Richard Feynman's last recorded words

    "Great is the human who has not lost his childlike heart."
    Mencius (Meng-Tse), 4th century BCE

  7. #37
    Sugar Hiccup OrangeAppled's Avatar
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    I don't really see myself as a calming person (if anything, I need someone to calm my nerves). Sure, I'm a healer, but it's not always neat and clean.

    My dynamic with ENFJs (all friendships) is more of a mutual back scratching sort of thing. I think that's what I like about it - at it's best, it's very win-win. I'm not sure what it's like at worst. Maybe the egos fight a bit for who gets to be the most inspirational one. It's like, "No, I encouraged you."
    Often a star was waiting for you to notice it. A wave rolled toward you out of the distant past, or as you walked under an open window, a violin yielded itself to your hearing. All this was mission. But could you accomplish it? (Rilke)

    INFP | 4w5 sp/sx | RLUEI - Primary Inquisitive | Tritype is tripe

  8. #38
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    A theory that has popped into my head:

    ENFJ males tend to want a calming influence that they can safety call home.

    ENFJ females want a challenging influence that will help push them away from the calmness.
    I can't speak for the guys and we talked about this in conjunction with gender roles at the meetup.

    I think it really depends on how Fe manifests itself, what it would find attractive. Some Fe-dom manifestations may be dignified and refined, others very parental and nurturing, others feisty and flame-y (rhymes with gamy!), and still others garish and gawdy. And there's a negative flip side to each of those relatively neutral descriptors as well. I guess the particular flavor of the function also colors what mental modes are attractive.

    That may be 100% BS, but I'm throwing it out there because this "Submit Reply" button isn't going to click itself.
    So much BS floating around, I don't think yours or mine makes a difference.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  9. #39
    Senior Member Sizzling Berry's Avatar
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    And my vote goes to.... ENTPs.
    Hot-hearted head

  10. #40
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
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    They seem to be an attractive bunch, but despite their being "Ps", I think there'd be a lot of viewpoint battling back and forth.
    Love is the point.

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