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  1. #371
    Member StoryToTell's Avatar
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    I think she wants to prove her(his?) emotional br00tality. Hardcore!


    Spamtar, I agree with you. Letting yourself get involved with someone is about exposing yourself and being vulnerable. Some aspects of being with someone different from you can be exhilerating at first but defaulting to your "cabin" is a natural thing to do. From there I guess it's about whether the other person will fit in with your decor.

    Ohz noez the cheezy!

  2. #372
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
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    Thanks StoryToTell, its worth expressing...perhaps as long one person relates...both the process...like shopping for a new home decor...and the substance/the judgment (deciding what to keep and what to return and what else will be needed)...has its benefits and its reasons.

    Perhaps its a P thang.
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  3. #373
    Senior Member Cranky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by spamtar View Post
    Really I suspect he and you would not have worked out long term and he noticed this, felt this. Maybe other reasons, regardless subjective reasons are usually essential irrelevant in these situations. It is what it is.

    Pain reminds us we are alive! Endings are hard yet consider looking at the experience under the totality of the circumstances, the big picture. Similar to how we notice a vacation for all of fun stuff we did during it and not simply the plane flight home.

    INTJs and INTPs love when we are allowed to escape from ourselves and feel the gushing warmth of sentimentalism and romance (it is a rare opportunity and not for the NT to miss). However, this role eventually wears thin more often for us than others (although the F doms may sense it in us before we do) and the requiem mass must be performed.

    Open yourself only to have allowed yourself to embrace during the experience but allow yourself to embrace the whole of it, good/bad and pleasure/pain. The biting sensational bittersweet awakening of being alive. Like long distant skiing/snowboarding and then being allowed to return to the warm cabin of you natural tendencies, as if returning home and comfort to pick up or memoirs, sit down in the armchair by your inner fireplace and add another chapter.
    I don't think this is cheesy at all, and I appreciate your wishes. I don't necessarily agree with the idea that I LOVE being able to escape into sentimentalism...if anything, I'm glad I've escaped FROM sentimentalism. My head spun, my world rocked, and my ooey-gooey demeanor makes me a little ill now. BUT, I am glad to have had the experience. And the cabin metaphor is perfect, being as that I am in my cabin now, and merrily doing all the stuff that I want to with no bloody desire whatsoever to go to all the parties and outings tonight.

    The thing that I think I'm gladdest that I did was to oh-so-permanently end my contact with him when it was clear he didn't want me. I didn't say "Call me if you change your mind"...and as a result, I'm not hovering over my cell or diving for the computer every time I hear an IM or email notification, or Facebook stalking him or whatever. I DID that, for MONTHS. It was NOT healthy, and I am glad that I didn't leave open any lines of communication, because I'd still be hoping (and moping) instead of living.
    Personally, *I* think I'm hysterically funny.

  4. #374
    Ghost Monkey Soul Vizconde's Avatar
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    Good. Clean breaks (at least to the external) is best at preserving what was good and regrouping ones psyche.
    I redact everything I have written or will write on this forum prior to, subsequent with and or after the fact of its writing. For entertainment purposes only and not to be taken seriously nor literally.

    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Spamtar - a strange combination of boorish drunkeness and erudite discussions, or what I call "an Irish academic"

  5. #375
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cranky View Post
    I don't necessarily agree with the idea that I LOVE being able to escape into sentimentalism...if anything, I'm glad I've escaped FROM sentimentalism. My head spun, my world rocked, and my ooey-gooey demeanor makes me a little ill now. BUT, I am glad to have had the experience. And the cabin metaphor is perfect, being as that I am in my cabin now, and merrily doing all the stuff that I want to with no bloody desire whatsoever to go to all the parties and outings tonight.
    One of the things that helped bond me to an INTJ friend was her realization that my caring and concern for her was rock-solid, totally consistent--and not manipulative. Loss of control can be very disorienting to INTJs--if they can intuit that exposure will not lead to exploitation of vulnerability...real trust and appreciation may follow...

  6. #376
    Senior Member Cranky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Fecal McAngry View Post
    One of the things that helped bond me to an INTJ friend was her realization that my caring and concern for her was rock-solid, totally consistent--and not manipulative. Loss of control can be very disorienting to INTJs--if they can intuit that exposure will not lead to exploitation of vulnerability...real trust and appreciation may follow...
    It was VERY disorienting, and unfortunately for me, I was most certainly exploited while emotionally vulnerable.

    I'm glad you weren't being manipulative towards your INTJ friend; doing so and maintaining contact with her would have been a bad idea. We plan long-term, and I happen to enjoy me some revenge.

    I in essence gave up any chance for revenge by cutting all ties with him. It's far more emotionally healthy this way, but there is a piece of me that wants to demonstrate to him what it's like to tangle with me when I'm not baking pies and making cow eyes at him. Just a small piece. And the desire will fade over time along with the anger.
    Personally, *I* think I'm hysterically funny.

  7. #377
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  8. #378
    Senior Member Cranky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Biaxident View Post


    Personally, *I* think I'm hysterically funny.

  9. #379
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cranky View Post


    Ooooo...I love it when you chase me with a hatchet...

    See me run...


  10. #380
    Senior Member Cranky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Biaxident View Post
    Ooooo...I love it when you chase me with a hatchet...

    See me run...

    :rolli:
    Personally, *I* think I'm hysterically funny.

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