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  1. #11
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Liminality View Post
    I'm more inclined to wonder what my self is, than whether I'm being it...Maybe they're sort've the same thing...

    Yeah same as. I'm still on a mission to find myself, so I never really feel like I know who I am. I know what people expect me to be, and at times I play those parts, but more often than not I am questioning who I really am, and what my real wants and needs are.

    Sometimes I think I have found me, but time passes and the shell no longer fits, so I shrug it off and go searching for a new one.

    I think I will always be like this though, since who we are changes as we grow.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

    Berb's Johari Berb's Nohari

  2. #12
    Ginkgo
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    To be honest, I really don't want to be myself because I want to improve myself, thus not being my past self. Unfortunately, my future self will probably laugh at me one day for being so silly. I can't really blame him. After all, he is better than me.

  3. #13
    Rainy Day Member Ingrid in grids's Avatar
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    What does the 'being' mean in 'being yourself'? Do you mean external or internal? By 'being yourself' do you mean acting out in a way that flows directly from how you feel internally, or simply feeling like yourself? I think there's a difference between 'being yourself' (for this can be carried out in your head), and exhibiting/behaving in a way that reflects your 'true self'.

    For me, l feel most 'myself' in my head, yet the kind of 'self' I have there is like a massive, complex web; layers upon layers of many other selves - almost too many to count. There, it's hard to answer 'who I am', and easier to ask 'who I can be'...like many smaller fragments, changing, moving, swapping, contradicting, that somehow make up a greater personality.

    I find that who I am (or the who I ams) internally doesn't truly match up with my outward character.. because they can't. The kind of external 'self' I prefer to maintain is simpler, much more consistent and follows a pattern of behaviour, more structured... not in any way inauthentic, just a certain blend of those many other selves, some more expressed and others suppressed. It's a pattern that seems to work. I don't think that this is not 'being yourself' and I certainly don't think that this is a loss of self, it's just lending less of it out less of it to get by.

    I find that as I'm getting older, and also meeting more people who I feel I can share more of my headspace with, my external and internal characters are becoming more in sync.

    I wonder if ANY of that made sense. I'm having trouble putting into words exactly what I want to say.
    Also, bare in mind that I'm an introverted NF and so the external world isn't exactly my home ground.
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  4. #14
    Diabolical Kasper's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thinkinjazz View Post
    Also, how do you create a poll?
    Polls should be created before you submit a thread but let us know what you want in it and it can be added by a mod.

  5. #15
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    i know that i am not much of myself, but i also know that my general ability to be myself and become myself is better than that of a few people, some of which can't tell that they are not themselves. my ability to see how i am not myself is part of this ability to become myself. i don't have to wonder about it. but i wonder about the causes. like, how much of my lack of identity with my full self is caused by stupid chemical issues or brain damage and how much of it can be fixed by intelligent and spiritual attempts. for instance, i have a horrible broken jerky handwriting, but after an ecstatic trance experience i had a perfect round handwriting for a very short period. to become myself, i should probably plug my fingers into an energy outlet/socket, every morning.

  6. #16
    Senior Member Liminality's Avatar
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    I think every thing you do, think, feel etc is a part of your self, an expression of the reactions to things, internally and externally that lead you to how you are.

    It's all just a set of criteria which is 'you' reacting to events in life second by second...

    It's always 'me', maybe something I deem part of my 'shadow', but it's still from me, still of me...

    How can something I feel or think or do not be a part of me when I'm the one doing feeling thinking it?

    Often there's a vast space between who I should be, who I want to be, who I reject and who I am, and anumber of other variations. There's me being pushed into a tight situation, but I'm still the one doing the reacting.

    I am my sense impressions, my feelings, my gut reactions etc I'm a particular thing, eg a line, and only lineular things maybe produced.

    I wonder which type has the most concrete, non fuzzy sense of self...

    ...Rambling over.

    Quote Originally Posted by nanook View Post
    i know that i am not much of myself, but i also know that my general ability to be myself and become myself is better than that of a few people, some of which can't tell that they are not themselves. my ability to see how i am not myself is part of this ability to become myself. i don't have to wonder about it. but i wonder about the causes. like, how much of my lack of identity with my full self is caused by stupid chemical issues or brain damage and how much of it can be fixed by intelligent and spiritual attempts. for instance, i have a horrible broken jerky handwriting, but after an ecstatic trance experience i had a perfect round handwriting for a very short period. to become myself, i should probably plug my fingers into an energy outlet/socket, every morning.
    Good analogy Yeah, I think handwriting is a good analogy.
    Come along Fool
    A direct hit of the senses you are disconnected
    It's not that it's bad, it's not that it's death
    It's just on the tip of your tongue, and you're so silent

  7. #17
    Senior Member TopherRed's Avatar
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    I lead with Fe/Ni, and sometimes I feel like I'm everybody else.

    Truth is, I do have a set of moral standards and rules I follow, that really are purely "me", but beyond that, I have fun. This elasaticity in my personality allows me to join with others, to become relavant. I find that Fe/Ni has the capacity to be one, long, ongoing costume party, and I change my image as often as I please (to which my morality will allow). I'm really not that unstable most of the time though--I'm rather plain, to be relavant, because most of the time, I'm with that sort of people (like at work).
    Love is the point.

  8. #18
    Senior Member INTP's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thinkinjazz View Post
    No I tend to be a very happy person,but I am always wondering if I am on center (something very typical of ENFP's)
    What do you mean by being on center?
    "Where wisdom reigns, there is no conflict between thinking and feeling."
    — C.G. Jung

    Read

  9. #19
    nevermore lane777's Avatar
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    I used to think I was being fake when other people were only bringing out different sides of me

    But I'm truly crushed that no one person can ever see you for all that you are. No one can make you feel so accepted that you bare all, because no one has the ability to appreciate your every quality - even if they wished it. This does not mean that I hide certain qualities in shame - rather I would not bother to reveal those qualities which would be disregarded anyway.
    To die would be an awfully big adventure - Peter Pan

    INFJ ~ 4w5 sp/sx ~ RLOAI ~ Inclusion e/w=1/0 (Melancholy Compulsive) Control: e/w=0/6 (Supine) Affection: e/w=4/0 (Phlegmatic Melancholy)

  10. #20
    Rainy Day Member Ingrid in grids's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lane777 View Post
    I used to think I was being fake when other people were only bringing out different sides of me

    But I'm truly crushed that no one person can ever see you for all that you are. No one can make you feel so accepted that you bare all, because no one has the ability to appreciate your every quality - even if they wished it. This does not mean that I hide certain qualities in shame - rather I would not bother to reveal those qualities which would be disregarded anyway.
    I can totally relate. Thank you for this post!

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