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  1. #1
    Senior Member souffle's Avatar
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    Default Sensitivity and fear of rejection in foruming. Anyone else?

    Yes, an anonymous forum like this is supposed to be, well... anonymous.

    No one knows who you are, you're just a random voice coming from somewhere that the readers couldn't really give a stuff about in their own real, personal life.

    Yet I still sometimes feel insecure when I post something on here, or any forum. I feel nervous when someone comments after my own comment. I feel even more nervous when someone quotes me and/or replies to me directly. What if their response is slightly negative, I fret. Sure, they won't judge me as a human being, as they don't know me, but they might judge the character behind the writer of this comment, aka, me as a human being!

    If the response is slightly negative, I begin to wish that I had stayed out of it, and not posted at all. Then the universe would be a better place, or something.

    Any other NF's here feel the same way?

  2. #2
    Nerd King Usurper Edgar's Avatar
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    Look into this:

    Listen to me, baby, you got to understand, you're old enough to learn the makings of a man.

  3. #3
    Senior Member souffle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Edgar View Post
    Look into this:

    How mean and negative of you...

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by souffle View Post
    If the response is slightly negative, I begin to wish that I had stayed out of it, and not posted at all.
    Yeah, for a while. But then I get over it quickly enough.

    Quote Originally Posted by souffle View Post
    Then the universe would be a better place, or something.
    err. I don't care about the betterment of the universe, quite honestly.

  5. #5
    Senior Member souffle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by matilda View Post


    err. I don't care about the betterment of the universe, quite honestly.
    Hehe I was trying to be funny. Over the top. You know.

  6. #6
    Senior Member JivinJeffJones's Avatar
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    Everyone has a few posts they wish they could take back. Hopefully mistakes you make here are mistakes you won't make irl (ie when it matters). If you run into some negativity just brush it off and try again. Most negativity here isn't serious anyway -- or so I tell myself.

  7. #7
    Senior Member souffle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JivinJeffJones View Post
    Everyone has a few posts they wish they could take back. Hopefully mistakes you make here are mistakes you won't make irl (ie when it matters). If you run into some negativity just brush it off and try again. Most negativity here isn't serious anyway -- or so I tell myself.
    That's a great perspective! Thanks!

  8. #8
    Senior Member Drezoryx's Avatar
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    i dont have such a fear infact a little opposite. something like not being sufficiently engaged (intellectually) or having too esoteric an interest that no one else does or having too wide and balanced a view which no one wants to contribute too. it doesnt induce fear tho. i like the intellectual volley argument after argument.. heated arguments especially. lots of fun but come rarely.
    Type 8 sx/sp/so
    O:C:E:A:N :: 65:69:59:57:9

  9. #9
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    feeling strongly - anything but fear - is the INFx thing to do.

    use the opportunity of the internet to learn to be yourself. you are only afraid of your reactions, if you don't allow yourself to have them. if you don't allow yourself to be yourself, you give other people the power, to bring you in a conflict with your self. and you are on the loosing side of the conflict. it's your previous intent against you and you submit. naturally you don't want end up there, and if you would rebel against it, you would still feel guilty. so you are afraid of what they write.

    you don't have to react outwardly just to be yourself, but the decision to avoid or flee from a situation must be rooted in the present and in conscious presence of your internal reaction. not in a premeditation. if you choose repeatedly to stay away from fights, that is character, but if you choose once to stay away from all fights, and stick to it, that's not integrity, but false self and the birth of fear.

    (even though wikipedia may contradict psychological reality and say something like: integrity is "to act as you said you would act" - wrong. you don't declare your character, you are your character.

    make sure you have nothing to loose. don't get attached to your account, it may be be deleted during your attempts to be yourself.

    let's get it on.

  10. #10
    a scream in a vortex nanook's Avatar
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    so we are often slaves to previous intent, but what is that? where does it hide? it's selfimage, moral ideas. being a good person. not loosing affection. it's also the echo of a desicion we once made in a rather traumatic situation. the belive that we have to react to offenders more nasty than socially acceptable (so we cant actually do it on a message board) or the believe that we must play the angsty victim to survive. (for example)

    anything else?

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