[NF] P is for Perfectionism

[Charmed Justice]

This is one of the scary things about ENFPs.

The dropping of things for the next best thing?

I hide what I am capable of a lot because I dont want people to fear it.

I think I used to do this a lot as well. Maybe even that I was afraid myself of what I was capable of and didn't want the attention.

 

[Poki]

The dropping of things for the next best thing?

Yes, but its in regard to dropping someone for the next best person, not necessarily a thing. I personally have never worried about being dropped by an ENFP. But I can understand why people fear this, not saying it is what you would do, but understand how this can drive fear in people and create a stereotype.

As an ISTP we tend to see where things can be taken and is one of the reasons we hide so much stuff. We can break things down into parts and apply those parts in so many different areas. I am starting to realize sometimes we tend to apply them in the wrong areas though.

I had the hardest time explaining to my wife that the fear has nothing to do with her reasons for doing what she did and that I am in 100% agreeance with the reason she did what she did, but its just realizing the person has the capability and know how to actually do it. At that point all you have is trust and if the trust is ever broken it seems like all there is left is fear.

I think I used to do this a lot as well. Maybe even that I was afraid myself of what I was capable of and didn't want the attention.

I dont like the attention either.

 

[Charmed Justice]

Yes, but its in regard to dropping someone for the next best person, not necessarily a thing. I personally have never worried about being dropped by an ENFP. But I can understand why people fear this, not saying it is what you would do, but understand how this can drive fear in people and create a stereotype.

I think the NFP trade up only applies to activities and things, not humans.NFPs value humans and relationships above all, so that's not our style. We also project optimism into the future, so we may believe in our hearts that a bad relationship is somehow going to get better if we just keep trying. Personally, I've never traded humans. My perfectionism has always been about doing things or material accomplishments rather than relationships. In relationships, I think NFPs are actually one of the least likely to trade up--even to our own detriment.

I had the hardest time explaining to my wife that the fear has nothing to do with her reasons for doing what she did and that I am in 100% agreeance with the reason she did what she did, but its just realizing the person has the capability and know how to actually do it. At that point all you have is trust and if the trust is ever broken it seems like all there is left is fear.

Totally agree here.

 

[Poki]

I think the NFP trade up only applies to activities and things, not humans.NFPs value humans and relationships above all, so that's not our style. We also project optimism into the future, so we may believe in our hearts that a bad relationship is somehow going to get better if we just keep trying. Personally, I've never traded humans. My perfectionism has always been about doing things or material accomplishments rather than relationships. In relationships, I think NFPs are actually one of the least likely to trade up--even to our own detriment.

Its the T/F split. When T types take things and bring it into the feeling realm where it doesnt belong. NFs seem to be collectors of people, a collector doesnt get rid of things for the next best thing. They hold onto what they have because they appreciate the value that it has to them Then you have the people who think they are collectors, but they are really in it hoping it is gonna provide some future profit.

 

[Lauren Ashley]

Yes, but its in regard to dropping someone for the next best person, not necessarily a thing.

It's like a countdown. ENFP losing interest in 5, 4, 3...

Oh wait, is this off-topic?

Yes, Ps can be perfectionists too.

 

[Poki]

It's like a countdown. ENFP losing interest in 5, 4, 3...

Oh wait, is this off-topic?

Yes, Ps can be perfectionists too.

It depends, somehow we managed to get from the original OP to this place so somehow in some way it all relates Also if you detour the ENFP they wont get the chance to lose interest

 

[Charmed Justice]

Its the T/F split. When T types take things and bring it into the feeling realm where it doesnt belong. NFs seem to be collectors of people, a collector doesnt get rid of things for the next best thing. They hold onto what they have because they appreciate the value that it has to them Then you have the people who think they are collectors, but they are really in it hoping it is gonna provide some future profit.

Hm. I don't think we necessarily hold onto people for the value that they hold for us, at least not predominantly. When I was younger, I had a thing about collecting toxic people. I'd get wrapped into their problems because I wanted to give of myself, not so much for what I could get. Although, I do feel good when I can give to others.

 

[Charmed Justice]

It depends, somehow we managed to get from the original OP to this place so somehow in some way it all relates Also if you detour the ENFP they wont get the chance to lose interest

Ha! I don't know what it means to be off-topic. But I love using that emoticon for fun.

 

[Poki]

Ha! I don't know what it means to be off-topic. But I love using that emoticon for fun.

Me too.

Hm. I don't think we necessarily hold onto people for the value that they hold for us, at least not predominantly. When I was younger, I had a thing about collecting toxic people. I'd get wrapped into their problems because I wanted to give of myself, not so much for what I could get. Although, I do feel good when I can give to others.

To me that is the value they provided. Whether it is a good or bad value for us we end up figuring out in the process.

 

[Charmed Justice]

To me that is the value they provided. Whether it is a good or bad value for us we end up figuring out in the process.

Well, since you put it that way.

 

[Soar337]

I know I'm a perfectionist, I don't like to admit it but I really am