User Tag List

First 67891018 Last

Results 71 to 80 of 220

  1. #71
    Senior Member AutumnReverie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Posts
    327

    Default

    I could definitely understand that ^ scenario. In fact, I did a similar thing to a friend of mine three years ago (made tentative plans with him, family thing came up & I forgot, then I didn't contact him at all afterward because I was embarrassed that I had done that...so I avoided). He ended up being really mad at me for a week or so, but I eventually apologized and we made up.

    So that's why, in this situation, I can't help but give him the benefit of the doubt.

    Anyways, I ended up sending him a text about a minute or so ago...basically I just jokingly referred to/asked about him not making it on Saturday. Told him that it was okay because we lost the game anyways lol. And said that I hoped everything went well back home (with a smiley face). I guess I'll see how he ends up responding to that.


    EDIT: Nevermind, it's all good.
    Last edited by AutumnReverie; 10-07-2009 at 07:34 AM.

  2. #72
    Senior Member AutumnReverie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Posts
    327

    Default

    So, just an update (for anyone still interested in knowing )...

    Our 2nd "hang out" (Skip if don't want the details! )
    Earlier this week, around Wed., he asked me if I wanted to hang out Saturday night. I agreed and mentioned a movie I wanted to see, then he asked if I wanted to eat beforehand. And thus, our plans were made!

    Well last night we went out. The place I chose to eat at was really busy, so I suggested just walking/driving around downtown for another place. But then every restaurant we went to had like a 40 min. wait (which was really strange, even for a Saturday night). Anyways, after checking out like 5 different restaurants we ended up leaving downtown and going to a restaurant near where I live (which was only 10 minutes away).

    It was fun though, we talked a lot while walking downtown and driving (and throughout the whole night). Dinner was good: he had a steak and I had salmon. The only awkward part, inevitably, was the "bill". When the waitress asked if we wanted the bill together or split, we both answered differently at the exact same time (him: "together", me: "split"). Which was a little awkward directly afterwards. After a bit of silence, the waitress said that she would just put the bill down and let us decide amongst ourselves later. I went to the restroom, came back, and he (the INFJ) had already paid for it.

    Next, we went to the movies! Although, I picked a theater that neither of us had ever been to before and I only had a general idea of where it was at. So we ended up lost. I tried calling the theater and no one would answer! Then eventually, I suggested asking for directions. So we stopped at a hotel and I asked them about the movie place and we got directions and a map! We ended up seeing "Zombieland" (he already had seen it, but he said he liked it and would love to see it again if that's what I wanted to see), haha, and I paid for the movie because I felt bad about him taking the dinner bill .

    Then he dropped me off at my apartment! Basically, he said about the same things as the last time we went out (i.e. "I had a fun time", "We should definitely do this again", etc.) and he also said that since we've done the dinner thing already we could do something else the next time

    Oh, and I did give him a hug this time. Although, it was one of those awkward in-the-car type of hugs unfortunately.

    When he was talking to me at the end of the evening (--> dropping me off), I didn't really say much and (again) was half-way out the door. And I think I may have even been not as enthusiastic as I should have been (even though I was on the inside). I think it's just because I get uncomfortable when the mood changes to something more "serious" or a discussion of "feelings". But, I'll try to improve!

    Anyways, my friend suggested that I text him this morning and assure him that I had a good time too (so that he wouldn't misinterpret my feelings-averse end-of-the-night natural disposition). So I did! I told him "I don't think I was clear, but I really had a good time last night and look forward hanging out again sometime soon!". He replied that he had a great time too and was looking forward to next time as well.

    ************************

    While we were driving, he also mentioned liking to "stay in" and having fun doing something low key. So I told him the next time we hang out we can have a board games/"low key" night! I'm thinking board games & ravoli (I'll cook or...try ) and then later horror movies & popcorn.

    To sum up: I still didn't get any direct confirmation from him that he's romantically interested in me. But, hopefully, maybe next time...

  3. #73
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    5w6 sp/so
    Posts
    3,424

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by AutumnReverie View Post
    And I think I may have even been not as enthusiastic as I should have been (even though I was on the inside). I think it's just because I get uncomfortable when the mood changes to something more "serious" or a discussion of "feelings".
    Hehe, I understand that part.

    Sounds like things have been great, I don't see much to "worry" about.
    You can't spell "justice" without ISTJ.

  4. #74
    Senior Member AutumnReverie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Posts
    327

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    Hehe, I understand that part.
    Haha, yeah, I need to work on that!

    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    Sounds like things have been great, I don't see much to "worry" about.
    I hope there's nothing to worry about! I spoke to my other INFJ friend last night and he said that he would never pay for someone else's dinner bill "just to be nice". He said that, personally, he wouldn't pay for the person unless the person was someone he was really good long-time friends with or someone he really liked. So I'm hoping that's true!

    But I don't want to "count my chickens", or whatever, and assume anything...

  5. #75
    "Everything in its place" fill's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    entp
    Enneagram
    753
    Posts
    507

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by AutumnReverie View Post
    After a bit of silence, the waitress said that she would just put the bill down and let us decide amongst ourselves later. I went to the restroom, came back, and he (the INFJ) had already paid for it.
    I've actually done this. Sounds like a really nice guy.

    Honestly, you're probably going to have to 'make the first move'. Actually, don't even do that. Just tell him you like him. Even if he doesn't feel the same way, he'll definitely appreciate your forwardness. Seriously, if he's just being a really good friend by paying the bill, then that's a friendship you don't want to lose; you definitely won't if you're direct.

    EDIT: I didn't want to mention it in fear of sounding like a bad person, but I probably wouldn't pay a bill unless I liked the person, hah.
    "Poor bastard. Wait 'till he sees the bats. "
    enneagram - 7/5/3

  6. #76
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Posts
    22

    Default

    I hate to speak for someone else's feelings, but if he's not interested in you romantically... no, I just can't see any way he's not.

    Good call on suggesting board games. Very, very excited for you!

  7. #77
    Senior Member AutumnReverie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Posts
    327

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by fill View Post
    Honestly, you're probably going to have to 'make the first move'. Actually, don't even do that. Just tell him you like him. Even if he doesn't feel the same way, he'll definitely appreciate your forwardness. Seriously, if he's just being a really good friend by paying the bill, then that's a friendship you don't want to lose; you definitely won't if you're direct.
    This idea scares me. Social "risks" are a no-no for me. Honestly though, if he still doesn't say anything the next Saturday night that we hang out, then the next time I'll really push myself to step forward. But hopefully it doesn't come to that! I'd so rather be the "responder" and have someone else be the "initiator" The bad thing is, he probably feels the same way...

    Quote Originally Posted by fill View Post
    EDIT: I didn't want to mention it in fear of sounding like a bad person, but I probably wouldn't pay a bill unless I liked the person, hah.
    I don't think that makes you a bad person! Going out to eat is expensive, which is why (even though I like him) I said "split" instead of "together" when the waitress asked.

    Quote Originally Posted by istina View Post
    I hate to speak for someone else's feelings, but if he's not interested in you romantically... no, I just can't see any way he's not.

    Good call on suggesting board games. Very, very excited for you!
    *crosses fingers*

    I'm excited for the "board game night" as well! I definitely don't want him to think he has to spend a lot of money to hang out with me. I like staying in and having fun at home just as much (if not more) than going out, haha.

    And thanks again for all the help, INFJs! I really appreciate (and need) it.

  8. #78
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Apr 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    9w1
    Posts
    473

    Default

    oh man, you're so cool

    i wish someone would go through all that for me *sigh*

  9. #79
    Cat Wench ReadingRainbows's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    MBTI
    ENFJ
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx/sp
    Socionics
    IEI Ni
    Posts
    1,899

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Requeim View Post
    oh man, you're so cool

    i wish someone would go through all that for me *sigh*
    Ditto! Agreed
    Quote Originally Posted by EffEmDoubleyou View Post
    St. Stephen took rocks and St. Sebastian took arrows. You only have to take some jerks on an internet forum. Nut up.

  10. #80
    Senior Member AutumnReverie's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISTJ
    Enneagram
    6w5
    Posts
    327

    Default

    Haha, aw thanks guys!

    But honestly, what's the difference between "date" and "hanging out"? Because, I don't understand (Other than the obvious, date implies that both parties are interested and each other, and there is sometimes physical intimacy). Or should that question be in it's own thread?

    If we ever actually go on a date, how different will it be from our Saturday night hangouts? From the INFJ perspective: What would you do differently? Would you actually straight-up label it a "date" or would you just assume that there is some sort of unspoken agreement?

    ETA: For the record, I do have a lot of guy friends. So I know what "hanging out" is in the context of hanging out in a group, hanging out with at least one other person there, hanging out/studying on a weekday night, etc. But not one-on-one dinner + activity + weekend night hanging out, so that's what I'm curious about. I usually only do that type of hanging out with a guy friend when he's gay (or when he's straight...but then he calls it a date).

    And I'm sorry if this seems like an obvious question but, I can be socially retarded at times :blushing: (as in, I don't know always know what the "rules" are in the social/dating realm or what certain social terminology "means" ) so I always feel the need to ask when in doubt.

Similar Threads

  1. [ESTP] How Do I Know If an ESTP is interested in me?
    By dippy in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 07-17-2017, 07:43 PM
  2. How does an ENFJ feel after rejecting someone?
    By Vavazhan in forum Intertype Relations
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 07-17-2017, 04:08 PM
  3. What does an INFJ look like under extreme stress (in your own words)
    By NK258 in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 03-22-2014, 07:11 PM
  4. [INFJ] How does an INFJ get to this sad point? :(
    By SilkRoad in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 10-29-2009, 05:26 AM
  5. [Ti] How Does an INFJ Go about Developing Tertiary Ti?
    By Glycerine in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 12-03-2008, 04:31 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO