User Tag List

First 1119202122 Last

Results 201 to 210 of 220

  1. #201
    Aquaria mrcockburn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    MBTI
    ¥¤
    Enneagram
    3w4 sp/so
    Posts
    1,907

    Default

    My most recent ex was INFJ, as am I.

    I show interest by teasing and joking around. I can be downright zany and clownish. Also by standing up for them. My ex was always pushed around, and I didn't tolerate it in my presence.

    The other INFJ, the ex, was opposite. He got really serious and said weird things like "Thank you for existing/being in my life", "I want to hug your parents for creating you", etc etc. He basically constantly doted gifts that I never even meant to hint on.

    Also by being vulnerable - seeking me out for protection, etc.
    3w4-9w1-?w6 (nearly headless nick)
    sp/so
    Lawful Evil

    COCKBURN:

    http://sundrytimes.files.wordpress.c...tomic-bomb.jpg


  2. #202
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    2
    Posts
    931

    Default

    I'm a female, but I have a male INFJ friend, so I might be able to answer for him, too.

    TO INFJs (preferably males, but females can answer as well):

    1. How would you try to catch the eye of another person?

    Get involved in a mutually interesting conversation. I approached my (now) husband for the first time by asking about a Christian fellowship meeting he had mentioned from up on stage at church. It turned into an hour long conversation.

    2. Would you ever ask somebody out before they had demonstrated distinct interest in you?

    Not if they had shown no interest at all, but if they had shown interest then I would. I would probably ask them to do something that was like a date, but not actually a date. My male friend, INFJ, said he never would have gotten up the courage to ask his wife out. She asked him.

    3. Once you have made contact, do you try to define the dating relationship? Or do you go with the flow?

    I have always moved fairly quickly into the monogamous relationship, once I know there is mutual interest.


    4. On a first date, how do you usually act?

    I never really went on "dates." I met most of my boyfriends in school and we always had opportunities to "hang out" around other people. So I knew them all really well before it turned romantic.

    5. How would you like to be approached/asked out by an interested person?

    Direct - no messing around.

    6. How long does it take for you to decide to date exclusively?

    Quickly

    7. What do you do that you consider a "dead give-away" that you like somebody?

    Contact them way too often. INFJ's have a tendency to be sort of like a stalker to someone they like. Touch is another thing - I may hug casual friends, but if I were touching you a lot for no reason, that would be a big clue.

    8. How often do you take the initiative/make the first move/ask someone out?

    Like I said, I never formally "dated" early in the relationship, so it would go from "hanging out" to just walking around campus alone together or hanging out in our dorm room.

    9. What would be your ideal date (activity)?

    Hiking in the woods, or anything that allows a lot of talking time.

    10. How should one go about pursuing you?

    Directly, no confusing signals. Just let me know where you are coming from.


    If this guy already asked you out to supper on Friday night, I would say he is definitely interested in you. If he is like most INFJ's, he is now feeling majorly insecure, and a big sign from you or an invitation would really help.

  3. #203
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    2
    Posts
    931

    Default

    [QUOTE=AutumnReverie;846749


    Hm well the last time we went out to dinner, I didn't notice him looking around at other people. In fact, he didn't even notice that we were the last ones in the restaurant and that the restaurant was closing until I pointed it out to him. Then he was like "Really?" and looked around to see the waiters putting up chairs and such, haha.



    [/QUOTE]

    What you just wrote - I would take this as a 95% that this guy is totally not only in like with you, but in love with you!!

  4. #204
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    2
    Posts
    931

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by AutumnReverie View Post
    Hm the "avoiding" bit has me intrigued, because at times I've felt like this was true (which is why I've been so confused when looking back on all our encounters as a whole). For example: Late in the spring semester, we had gotten into a routine of having lunch together about twice a week (after class). He's the one who initiated it and began walking with me somewhere to eat then eating together, instead of riding his bike back to his room like he usually did. However all of sudden for a week or two he just stopped and started riding his bike back to his room like normal. At this point I wasn't romantically interested in him yet, but it still really confused me. I figured that maybe he just didn't like me anymore or was busy. But it was still strange -- the avoidance. After about two weeks he started having lunch with me again, invited me to a lecture/discussion with him (he's into political science), and everything was "normal" again.

    Currently, he's still kind of hard to interpret (like I hinted at in the opening post). He'll seem very interested in spending time with me and happy/attentive/talkative when he's actually around me, one day. Then the next week, he'll fail to text or call me at all*. He did finally message me after a week and said that he's been busy (then he asked how I was/what I was up to, etc.), and I completely believe him (because he's mentioned his schedule before and he said we could do something again next weekend), but still...it makes me wonder if he's actually interested in me at all or maybe if he's "on the fence".

    *Although I should probably note, in his defense, that he seems to be horrible with contacting people via text/phone. Shortly after he had texted me back, he updated his Facebook status to say "[his name] needs to learn how to call people" And about 5 of his friends (both male and female) replied: "Just pick up the phone, it's not that hard", "You need to learn how to text people too", etc.

    INFJs can be very confusing - subtle signals, attentiveness, avoidance, attentiveness again, etc.

    I'm glad I have you all to help me though!

    New Question: Are INFJs very indecisive/fickle when it comes to deciding on who they like? Or do they pretty much "know" and stick with that (barring any major complications/events/etc that would change their mind)?

    For me (ISTJ): I may be indecisive (weighing all options and leaning towards a different option each day) leading up to a decision, but once I actually make a decision I'm committed to it fully. It may have taken me 5 months or so to reach the conclusion that I am actually interested in him (romantically) but now that I've come to that conclusion, I definitely will not be debating it anymore in my mind. Now I've moved on to the next step/decision: Determining if he's also interested in me and taking any necessary steps.
    You asked if INFJ's are indecisive about who they like. I would say absolutely not! INFJ's are the opposite - we are very aware of who we like or don't like. And if we like someone, then it is a really strong emotion. But we are fickle in the sense that we get insecure about relationships and will ignore someone if we feel like we might get rejected by them.

  5. #205
    my floof is luxury Wind Up Rex's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    853 sx/sp
    Posts
    4,983

    Default

    They're incredibly sweet. It's like you get an invitation into their world. You feel like they've created a space for just the two of you. They talk to you about interesting things at length. And then general guy stuff like showing you off to their friends, and wanting to hang out a lot.

    I noticed one thing that is particularly INFJ, which is they tend to actively cultivate the talents of those closest to them. They see neat things about you and go out of their way to help you explore and develop that talent in a practical way. The flip side is that they feel free to be Bossy the Cow with you once they feel comfortable.
    And so long as you haven’t experienced this: to die and so to grow,
    you are only a troubled guest on the dark earth

  6. #206
    Aquaria mrcockburn's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    MBTI
    ¥¤
    Enneagram
    3w4 sp/so
    Posts
    1,907

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Wind-up Rex View Post
    The flip side is that they feel free to be Bossy the Cow with you once they feel comfortable.
    oh pfffft! Says an ENTJ!
    3w4-9w1-?w6 (nearly headless nick)
    sp/so
    Lawful Evil

    COCKBURN:

    http://sundrytimes.files.wordpress.c...tomic-bomb.jpg


  7. #207
    my floof is luxury Wind Up Rex's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    MBTI
    ENTJ
    Enneagram
    853 sx/sp
    Posts
    4,983

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by mrcockburn View Post
    oh pfffft! Says an ENTJ!
    Precisely, which is why I was all the more taken a back by some cheeky male giving me sass about my lifestyle.
    And so long as you haven’t experienced this: to die and so to grow,
    you are only a troubled guest on the dark earth

  8. #208
    In orbit
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx
    Posts
    291

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Lily flower View Post
    You asked if INFJ's are indecisive about who they like. I would say absolutely not! INFJ's are the opposite - we are very aware of who we like or don't like. And if we like someone, then it is a really strong emotion. But we are fickle in the sense that we get insecure about relationships and will ignore someone if we feel like we might get rejected by them.
    I always know who I like. When I was younger I've also dated guys I haven't liked that strongly because I've been lonely and bored but they fizzle real fast. The few I've had meaningful relationships with I have instantly liked very strongly and In two occasions moved in with within 2 weeks and the last one was my husband (who is an enfp) which was mutual love at first sight, instant "Oh we're getting married" and so we did as fast as we could to the sheer horror of everyone and It's been what I thought it would be.
    As for how I attract guys is I turn my radar on them and they come. ;D That's the only way I can describe it.

  9. #209
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    2
    Posts
    931

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Reverie View Post
    I always know who I like. When I was younger I've also dated guys I haven't liked that strongly because I've been lonely and bored but they fizzle real fast. The few I've had meaningful relationships with I have instantly liked very strongly and In two occasions moved in with within 2 weeks and the last one was my husband (who is an enfp) which was mutual love at first sight, instant "Oh we're getting married" and so we did as fast as we could to the sheer horror of everyone and It's been what I thought it would be.
    As for how I attract guys is I turn my radar on them and they come. ;D That's the only way I can describe it.
    Ah yes, the INFJ radar. What a great thing to have. It has a kind of wide radius for me, in that it catches people it's not supposed to, but other than that it's great.

  10. #210
    In orbit
    Join Date
    Jul 2011
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    4w3 sx
    Posts
    291

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Lily flower View Post
    Ah yes, the INFJ radar. What a great thing to have. It has a kind of wide radius for me, in that it catches people it's not supposed to, but other than that it's great.
    That's when you quickly employ the INFJ invisibility cloaking device!

Similar Threads

  1. [ESTP] How Do I Know If an ESTP is interested in me?
    By dippy in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 07-17-2017, 07:43 PM
  2. How does an ENFJ feel after rejecting someone?
    By Vavazhan in forum Intertype Relations
    Replies: 23
    Last Post: 07-17-2017, 04:08 PM
  3. What does an INFJ look like under extreme stress (in your own words)
    By NK258 in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 16
    Last Post: 03-22-2014, 07:11 PM
  4. [INFJ] How does an INFJ get to this sad point? :(
    By SilkRoad in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 10-29-2009, 05:26 AM
  5. [Ti] How Does an INFJ Go about Developing Tertiary Ti?
    By Glycerine in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 12-03-2008, 04:31 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO