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  1. #101
    Senior Member cafe's Avatar
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    I don't think the chemical pouncing mechanism is type-related. I find myself practically snorting my INTP's scent when I'm ovulating. It's kind of embarrassing, but I can't help myself. Eighteen years and I still want to snort him and generally act like a cat in heat.

    I would have been in big trouble if I'd gotten a good whiff of him and we'd turned out to have incompatible personalities. Thankfully I'd gotten to know him a bit before I ever got close enough to smell him.

    It's just gene compatibility, IMO.
    “There are two novels that can change a bookish fourteen-year old’s life: The Lord of the Rings and Atlas Shrugged. One is a childish fantasy that often engenders a lifelong obsession with its unbelievable heroes, leading to an emotionally stunted, socially crippled adulthood, unable to deal with the real world. The other, of course, involves orcs.”
    ~ John Rogers

  2. #102
    Junior Member Tea-Snob's Avatar
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    I don't post on the site very often but I identified with the INFJ/ENFP dynamic described in this thread. The (Female) ENFP in question and myself tend to have little misunderstandings that can blow up like land-mines. With other people such heated arguments are anathema to me, but with my ENFP they are often very short lived and followed by an incredible hug..

    I would characterize this behaviour between us in the following ways:

    1) Easy access to a "silly switch" and / or a "poke with a stick" makes it very hard for us to be mad at one another. Infuriating though it is, I find myself grinning like an idiot at my ENFP whilst she is scolding me - and even worse she GETS IT.

    2) When we misunderstand each other we seem to bump into each in the dark even when we are trying not to. We argue about "Who sang this song?", only to find out that the singer that she thought it was, sings in the band that I thought it was. 2 paths, 1 result.

    3) During a misunderstanding my ENFP views me as "Running around looking for the exits and ignoring the huge door that she is pointing out to me." This isn't really the same as mutual understanding between equals but it works. It is more sort of like "Well I know your from another country dude, but here in the real world we do things differently"

    4) We "Click" and it's great - but I think we see it as something to look forward to (Like a sunny day or a full moon) rather than there being something wrong if it doesnt happen.

    5) If she sits and stares at me for long enough I will get nervous and do something amusing, endearing or stupid - depending on how nervous I get. If she sits next to me too long it is better if I don't try to operate heavy machinery or do brain surgery.
    [sits down in front of the computer] Subject: Fire. "Dear Sir stroke Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire which has broken out at the premises of..." no, that's too formal [Deletes] "Dear Sir stroke Madam. Fire, exclamation mark. Fire, exclamation mark. Help me, exclamation mark. 123 Carrendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. All the best."

  3. #103
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wild horses View Post
    This is interesting as very few people would regard ENFPs as aloof unless they are pursuing them romantically. It is my opinion that ENFPs that have deep feelings for someone may very well act colder and more aloof than usual! So be encouraged...
    I've heard about the "colder" thing about both ENFJ's and ENFP's. Can anyone explain to me why?

  4. #104
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea-Snob View Post
    I don't post on the site very often but I identified with the INFJ/ENFP dynamic described in this thread. The (Female) ENFP in question and myself tend to have little misunderstandings that can blow up like land-mines. With other people such heated arguments are anathema to me, but with my ENFP they are often very short lived and followed by an incredible hug..

    I would characterize this behaviour between us in the following ways:
    so it's easy to get back on track?

    1) Easy access to a "silly switch" and / or a "poke with a stick" makes it very hard for us to be mad at one another. Infuriating though it is, I find myself grinning like an idiot at my ENFP whilst she is scolding me - and even worse she GETS IT.

    2) When we misunderstand each other we seem to bump into each in the dark even when we are trying not to. We argue about "Who sang this song?", only to find out that the singer that she thought it was, sings in the band that I thought it was. 2 paths, 1 result.
    it's easy to be very real mentally, which is great bc it's easy to build up positive momentum really easily, but i've found it difficult to be emotionally consistent and communicate consistently through various emotional fluctuations.

    3) During a misunderstanding my ENFP views me as "Running around looking for the exits and ignoring the huge door that she is pointing out to me." This isn't really the same as mutual understanding between equals but it works. It is more sort of like "Well I know your from another country dude, but here in the real world we do things differently"
    this is one of the greatest experiences i get from enps too. i can just feel my mind take a deep breath and calm down. i think, in reverse, one of the most intriguing things on the other side of the coin is that when she's in those imaginary mazes and tunnels, i'm like, don't worry--i got this. believe me, i've seen this a million times before, i've practiced this, i'm an expert at the most complicated of imaginary mazes. hold on let me pull up my mapquest...

    4) We "Click" and it's great - but I think we see it as something to look forward to (Like a sunny day or a full moon) rather than there being something wrong if it doesnt happen.
    you both have an easy time keeping the faith? is she a 7w6 or 7w8? an sx type?

    5) If she sits and stares at me for long enough I will get nervous and do something amusing, endearing or stupid - depending on how nervous I get. If she sits next to me too long it is better if I don't try to operate heavy machinery or do brain surgery.
    what a great feeling! it usually takes me a while to thaw, which is why i appreciate the moment when i can sooo much! it's very freeing.

  5. #105
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Charmed Justice View Post
    From relationship satisfaction surveys that I've read, statistically, NFs are happiest when they are with other NFs.
    Definitely!!!!

  6. #106
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea-Snob View Post
    1) Easy access to a "silly switch" and / or a "poke with a stick" makes it very hard for us to be mad at one another. Infuriating though it is, I find myself grinning like an idiot at my ENFP whilst she is scolding me - and even worse she GETS IT.

    .
    Oh, this is so great! We do that, too! (INFJ/ENFJ) My husband and I couldn't even get in arguments for the first 5 years we were married, because we both thought the other person looked so ridiculous when they were mad. So when we started an argument, we always ended up in a fit of laughter.

  7. #107
    i love skylights's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by fill View Post
    I like ENFPs a lot, but I've always had trouble getting to know them right away. They're somewhat aloof in some senses, and it seems like the only way to know them is by pure coincidence.
    Quote Originally Posted by Wild horses View Post
    This is interesting as very few people would regard ENFPs as aloof unless they are pursuing them romantically. It is my opinion that ENFPs that have deep feelings for someone may very well act colder and more aloof than usual! So be encouraged...


    i try to cover up my deep feelings until i get clues that they are reciprocated. it's fear of rejection, basically. as for deep relationships - i feel like i can hit it off well with someone in a matter of minutes, but long spans of time together make my heart melt. in a relationship everything changes. i'm usually flighty -> i'm probably too committed. i'm usually distractable -> i'm probably too attentive to the object of my affection. if you want to understand me in a relationship, basically take everything you know about me and turn it on its head. i tried to figure out why... i think it's probably because i'm no longer the top of my priority list. the other person is.

    curious things humans are, aren't we?

    Quote Originally Posted by Tea-Snob
    1) Easy access to a "silly switch" and / or a "poke with a stick" makes it very hard for us to be mad at one another. Infuriating though it is, I find myself grinning like an idiot at my ENFP whilst she is scolding me - and even worse she GETS IT.
    THIS IS TRUE. AND I LOVE IT.

  8. #108
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    Woah woah woah, you aren't trying to compare MBTI and socionics, are you? The functions in socionics =/= the functions in MBTI in any way. Plus, there is no concept of letters. People are different MBTI types than they are socionics types quite often.

  9. #109
    Junior Member Tea-Snob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lily flower View Post
    Oh, this is so great! We do that, too! (INFJ/ENFJ) My husband and I couldn't even get in arguments for the first 5 years we were married, because we both thought the other person looked so ridiculous when they were mad. So when we started an argument, we always ended up in a fit of laughter.
    Yes, that's it! It's not easy being mad at someone when they have a copy of your instuction manual that tells them all your cheat codes! :S I would define spending time with my ENFP as "Getting very dizzy whilst someone pokes me with a stick - but in a good way" - My ENFP defines spending time with her INFJ as "This is the chance I've been waiting for, let's FLY, woooo!! Look at all the stars!!!"

    Quote Originally Posted by the state i am in View Post
    you both have an easy time keeping the faith? is she a 7w6 or 7w8? an sx type?
    It is not always easy but I do think though that dynamic sort of trumps everything.. I hope it will always be that way or better XD
    [sits down in front of the computer] Subject: Fire. "Dear Sir stroke Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire which has broken out at the premises of..." no, that's too formal [Deletes] "Dear Sir stroke Madam. Fire, exclamation mark. Fire, exclamation mark. Help me, exclamation mark. 123 Carrendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. All the best."

  10. #110
    Junior Member Tea-Snob's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tea-Snob View Post
    It is not always easy but I do think though that dynamic sort of trumps everything.. I hope it will always be that way or better XD
    Forgot to mention - 2w1 SO/SP
    [sits down in front of the computer] Subject: Fire. "Dear Sir stroke Madam, I am writing to inform you of a fire which has broken out at the premises of..." no, that's too formal [Deletes] "Dear Sir stroke Madam. Fire, exclamation mark. Fire, exclamation mark. Help me, exclamation mark. 123 Carrendon Road. Looking forward to hearing from you. All the best."

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