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  1. #41
    Senior Member LEGERdeMAIN's Avatar
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    Great question, antisocial one. Often times I'm the first one to recognize when something is up. Once I realize something is "up", I check facial expressions and eyes and determine who is involved in the "up". Once I figure out the players in our "up" dramedy, I deduce with sexually-fueled intuitive intuition what the "up" is. 9 times out of 10 I'm correct in determining what is going on, who is involved and even predicting the short-term outcomes of the "up".

    something, something...blach balkhlbh
    “Some people will tell you that slow is good – but I’m here to tell you that fast is better. I’ve always believed this, in spite of the trouble it’s caused me. Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba…”


  2. #42
    Member dani_elle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    How do you pick emotions of other people ?


    In theory this is something in what NFs are suppose to be great at. So I am wondering how this works. Do you understand what the person is feeling right away? (like you should in online tests)
    Or it is more likely that you will slowly have to figure it out through a body language/voice or somethinng like that ?
    I notice small details and subtle cues about people which can give their emotions away, as well as their tone of voice, body language, so on.

    Its pretty hard to explain these "cues" and how I start to notice them.
    I am an ENFP but I value justice over mercy.

  3. #43
    Junior Member ~~ENFJ~~'s Avatar
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    I get a general vibe from a person I'm paying attention to that creates a feeling of tension, recoil from, or a sort of physical draw towards a person based on his or her mood. I then first unconsciously assess the situation to apply a concept to it (happy, sad, excited, contemplative, determined) based on what I believe are numerous sources of concrete info that many people are not as finely attuned to as some of us like body posture, choice of words, facial markers, etc. I then consciously think through why the person could be feeling that way, assessing what I know of the person, what is being said, what the circumstances and context are, etc.

    I then almost unconsciously and practically instantaneously go through a rolodex in my mind of every situation that I've ever known through my own experiences, those imparted to me, those I've read about, etc to see which are similar to what's going on, very quickly paring it down to a small group of comparative examples. That really happens without thought or effort. I might verbalize the similarities or ask questions to affirm or eliminate my comparisons. Were you scared? What did you do? If I need to ask questions, I don't usually need many. It is sort of like that children's game Guess Who?

    The hardest people to read are those who are naturally monotone, expressionless, brief, and who don't share explanations or values or thoughts. There's nothing to work with. There's also little interest for me and a lot of potential for things to go wrong, so I generally steer clear from people I can't get a good feel for. If I'm thrown into a situation with them, I'll usually go to one extreme or the other--doing almost all of the talking or almost none of it--based on my mood that day and interest in the person. Either way, I'll probably feel tense and not walk away happy about the encounter.

    Basically, what I would look for in a potential friend is type-appropriate enthusiasm about something (you know how moms feel suspicious of single men at a park but relax when they see the men came with children? I have a similar unease when I don't know what the person is passionate about), that we share basic values, that the person is stable, honest, and trustworthy, that the person is particularly respectful in speech and conduct, that the person is not personally offended or threatened by my thoughts or passions, and that the person just generally isn't annoying or a boor. Whatever else, I'm cool with it. I know what to expect and can adapt easily.
    Tilde
    Classic ENFJ woman--passionate, loyal, misunderstood
    -slightly expressed extroverted, intuitive personality
    -distinctively expressed feeling, judging personality

  4. #44
    Senior Member Silly_Siren's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    How do you pick emotions of other people ?


    In theory this is something in what NFs are suppose to be great at. So I am wondering how this works. Do you understand what the person is feeling right away? (like you should in online tests)
    Or it is more likely that you will slowly have to figure it out through a body language/voice or somethinng like that ?

    I am wondering if you try to determine this piece of information by "default" or it taks a conscious action to do this ? (or it depends)



    Also if someone asks you how many emotions do you recognize what would you say as an answer ?



    The reason why I am asking is because I am wondering about how to have a better dinamic with NFs in real life.
    A lot of it is just being people-conscious and engaging your F. Think about things from a person-centered-view. You may be a T but you're still human

    I should also add that not everyone feels like mentally clashing to delve deeper into an issue and deconstruct arguments. Sometimes an "OMG you're so right!" would suffice
    =universal solution

  5. #45
    Senior Member LEGERdeMAIN's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Silly_Siren View Post
    A lot of it is just being people-conscious and engaging your F. Think about things from a person-centered-view. You may be a T but you're still human

    I should also add that not everyone feels like mentally clashing to delve deeper into an issue and deconstruct arguments. Sometimes an "OMG you're so right!" would suffice
    OMG, you're so right.
    “Some people will tell you that slow is good – but I’m here to tell you that fast is better. I’ve always believed this, in spite of the trouble it’s caused me. Being shot out of a cannon will always be better than being squeezed out of a tube. That is why God made fast motorcycles, Bubba…”


  6. #46
    Senior Member Silly_Siren's Avatar
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    You're a quick study!
    =universal solution

  7. #47
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    I pull out a special ring and tap it 3 times to summon the other persons true feelings in written form.

    Heh. No, but honestly it really doesn't seem to be a long process at all. It usually happens fairly quickly. One look at the other's face, can tell you a lot, instantly. Also, if you're on the phone, there's a general idea of what someone SHOULD be saying in a certain situation, and if they aren't saying that...or aren't saying it in a certain way...that's easy to pick up on to. But usually it happens quickly.

  8. #48
    Senior Member Drezoryx's Avatar
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    pretty unconscious and quick process
    Type 8 sx/sp/so
    O:C:E:A:N :: 65:69:59:57:9

  9. #49
    Retired Member Wonkavision's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    How do you pick emotions of other people ?

    In theory this is something in what NFs are suppose to be great at. So I am wondering how this works.
    I'll try to explain it using a typological model, because I think that's a helpful way to describe these things.

    But I hope you will keep in mind that I'm mostly explaining myself.

    If other ENFPs read this, I hope they take it with a grain of salt.


    I'm an ENFP, which is sometimes referred to as "The Psychologist."

    I think this is an appropriate description, or at least one that describes me well.


    I have basically spent my whole life analyzing myself and others.

    I have been constructing, in my mind, a conceptual model of the human condition, based on some research and observation, but mostly experience and intuition.

    I've been at this for 34 years now, and I will continue to build on it.

    The model is very fluid, in the sense that is continuously developed and modified as I go through life.

    At the same time, however, the model does not radically change with each new bit of research, experience, observation, or intuition.

    The basic framework stays the same, but some of the variables or components will change from time to time--the same way many theories and conceptual models are apt to change.


    On a very basic level, I "get where people are coming from."

    This may include picking up on others' emotions, but I would extend it to include things like a sense of a person's general world-view, or a sense of the general feeling (or "zeitgeist") of a particular era.


    Details are often helpful, but I generally focus on the "feel" of things.

    Intuition, in the Jungian sense, does not not mean simply a guess.

    And Feeling, in the Jungian sense, does NOT mean emotions.

    The general "feel" I'm talking about is a form of genuine understanding.


    Extraverted Intuition obtains information from the environment, which is then processed, in a rational way, by Introverted Feeling.

    This, in itself, is a reliable way to operate in life.

    Not everyone operates this way--there are different personality types.

    People who assume it is unreliable simply do not understand it objectively.


    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post

    Do you understand what the person is feeling right away? (like you should in online tests)
    Or it is more likely that you will slowly have to figure it out through a body language/voice or somethinng like that ?
    I do read facial expressions and notice body language, but my skill is not really in the physical realm.

    My skill is interpreting what people say, and the deeper meanings behind their words.

    Sensing may play a minor role in all of this, I am not really very focused on physical cues.

    I'm not incredibly aware of the subtle cues that facial expressions and body language give away.

    And I don't really focus on subtle changes in a person's voice.

    I think Extraverted Sensors are much more attuned to these kinds of things.

    I am more attuned to what is revealed in the content of what people say-- to the subtext, the undertones, or the overtones conclealed in the words.

    My initial impressions will begin pretty broad, and they will tend to get more refined as I receive more information.

    I do it mostly without effort, and it's generally pretty fast.

    I can usually feel "where someone is coming from" within minutes of meeting them, or within a couple of minutes of hearing them speak.


    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post

    I am wondering if you try to determine this piece of information by "default" or it taks a conscious action to do this ? (or it depends)
    I determine these things in a mostly instinctive way, most of the time.

    I don't usually analyze people in the form of an interior monologue, but in an active and spontaneous way, while interacting with them.

    I learn in a largely "kinesthetic" way--meaning that I learn well by actively participating.

    I take in information through direct experience, via Extraverted Intuition.

    Since I'm dominant Ne, I tend to use Ne without effort.

    I'm not really doing it consciously, it's just my general mode of existence.


    Since Fi is my secondary function, it takes more conscious effort to use Fi.


    Most of the time, I'm extremely perceptive about whatever it is people are feeling.

    I do long stretches of Extraverted Perceiving before sifting through and applying judgement.

    This enables me to perceive things that Introverted Judgement would partially obscure.

    When I do start applying judgement, it's in the form others here have described.

    Basically, I compare and contrast the interpersonal interactions I've had in the past, as well as interactions I've read about, or observed, with the one(s) I'm presently thinking about.

    There are some fairly predictable patterns in interpersonal interactions, and some commonly used defense mechanisms and ways of interpreting them.

    Being an Extravert, I'm constantly engaging in social interactions.
    This gives me a broad perspective about the varieties of interpersonal communication.

    I'm not merely speculating, I'm calculating probabilities based on experience.

    Altogether it forms a kind of model for understanding the human psyche, but its difficult to explain the process in the space of a mere post.
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  10. #50
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    When I engage with T person I'm usually captivated fwiw. I'm always listening for any feeling they might possess. Usually in the form of words, but also nonverbal language. I listen for previous people experience they might have had in their lives because I'm always learning from people who aren't so well can't describe what that is, but I do gravitate towards thinking types.

    One thing that turns me off of this type is when they test me by their inane catch phrases or such. I clearly believe this means they don't want me as a friend or anything else. By catch phrases I mean those used with a touch of sarcasm and pinch of tradition. This is a complete turn off for me. It's like the person has nothing genuine to say to a fellow being or something. Heart does matter.

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