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View Poll Results: Are male INFJ's really that uncommon?

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  • Yes

    15 53.57%
  • No

    5 17.86%
  • I don't know.

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  1. #31
    Senior Member wedekit's Avatar
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    I'm thinking ENTP. There's probably only room for one J type in any relationship I'm in, lol.
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  2. #32
    Senior Member Eileen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chippinchunk View Post
    I read somwhere that INFJ's personality are idealy matched with ENTP.
    Again, I don't particularly believe in using type to choose mates, but I will say that if my ENTP lover hadn't been so self-absorbed and romantically ridiculous (he leans towards polyamory despite his own objections to it), it would probably have been the best relationship I ever had.
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  3. #33
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    I almost completely repeat what the last person said.

    I too, am very wary of using the MBTI for match making, but if I did, I'd suggest the ENTP for the INFJ.
    I'd also say, avoid your clones and ESTPs(that second letter makes a profound difference).
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  4. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic Poriferan View Post
    I almost completely repeat what the last person said.

    I too, am very wary of using the MBTI for match making, but if I did, I'd suggest the ENTP for the INFJ.
    I'd also say, avoid your clones and ESTPs(that second letter makes a profound difference).
    Why avoid the S? I've had more problems with N types than S types in relationships.

  5. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    Why avoid the S? I've had more problems with N types than S types in relationships.
    Ns and Ss are on different "wavelengths", and it can be difficult to communicate with each other, because their communication styles are different. It almost feels like the two were raised from other-worldly cultures. So when a S is communicating with a S, or an N is communicating with an N, it will feel like they're both from the same "culture".

    When a S is paired with a S, they talk to each other in straightfoward, literal terms. This is very understandable to both.

    Ns give off vibes that are more vague, whether it's verbal or not, and because other Ns naturally communicate in this style as well, they're just on the same plane.
    To Ss, it can seem like the N is "holding back" on a ton of words (or details) that should "just spill out".

    When I learned about the S/N, it made so much sense... the family members I live with are Ss, and my whole life every one of my friends were Ss, except for one N, and she was the only one where I felt we were so "natural" with each other. Even before I knew about the S/N communication, let alone MBTI, I never felt connection with the S friends and family at all. It always felt like they just weren't on the same page as I was. Actually... I always just felt so far away.


    But more back on topic - I guess what Magic Poriferan meant was that a relationship can be difficult (or distant) enough when you don't share the S/N trait, let alone every other letter being the opposite.

    I've actually heard that an INFJ/ESTP relationship can be very electrifying (in a good way) though. Not saying this is true; just what I've heard. But for a side note, my best romantic connection was with an ESTP.

  6. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by deep rain View Post
    Ns and Ss are on different "wavelengths", and it can be difficult to communicate with each other, because their communication styles are different. It almost feels like the two were raised from other-worldly cultures. So when a S is communicating with a S, or an N is communicating with an N, it will feel like they're both from the same "culture".

    When a S is paired with a S, they talk to each other in straightfoward, literal terms. This is very understandable to both.

    Ns give off vibes that are more vague, whether it's verbal or not, and because other Ns naturally communicate in this style as well, they're just on the same plane.
    To Ss, it can seem like the N is "holding back" on a ton of words (or details) that should "just spill out".

    When I learned about the S/N, it made so much sense... the family members I live with are Ss, and my whole life every one of my friends were Ss, except for one N, and she was the only one where I felt we were so "natural" with each other. Even before I knew about the S/N communication, let alone MBTI, I never felt connection with the S friends and family at all. It always felt like they just weren't on the same page as I was. Actually... I always just felt so far away.


    But more back on topic - I guess what Magic Poriferan meant was that a relationship can be difficult (or distant) enough when you don't share the S/N trait, let alone every other letter being the opposite.

    I've actually heard that an INFJ/ESTP relationship can be very electrifying (in a good way) though. Not saying this is true; just what I've heard. But for a side note, my best romantic connection was with an ESTP.
    I understand the S/N difference - I grew up in a family of S types (with the exception of my brother). I just find that there are ways I can connect with an S type - they just don't involve abstract theory or deep rooted discussions. I have enough N type friends to satisfy that sort of need for me, though. For my ISTP boyfriend - we do a LOT of activities together. It helps that I have an athletic bent & can generally keep up with him, but we definitely connect in this way. I also feel he grounds me a bit & get my heads out of the clouds - he gets me out DOING things in the world instead of thinking about the world. Since I have the natural inclination to act upon m thoughts, it's like I get an extra push. We both share a mutual attaction and appreciation for one another & provide one another with stability and loyalty - which is a HUGE core relationship need for the both of us. He's also willing to do things that I enjoy - namely sitting around playing scrabble & doing puzzles (haha) - even though it's not exactly his strength & I am willing to do the same for him. If anything, it's broadening my horizons a bit - and honestly? Learning about how he differs from me & finding ways to connect regardless DOES fulfill some weird INFJ need for me.

    In relationships, I've dated only one N (INTP) and while the connection was overwhelmingly amazing, the semantics of a relationship really didn't work out. We wanted different sort of things, which surely happens with anyone regardless of type. I've also been interested in other possible N types, but I've always had the same issue. I find I get more of my core relationship needs fulfilled by S types and while we certainly connect on different levels - I get that abstract intellectual connection with my friends. I don't need it in a relationship to feel fulfilled. This could very well be attributed to needing the sort of things in a relationship that were provided to me by my S type parents, though. My idea of what a relationship should look like has certainly been inadvertantly influenced by them.

    I guess I just don't think people should be discredited because of a difference in how each person thinks. If you find yourself an open minded enough S or N, he or she may not see things the same exact way that you do but they will respect you & love you for being who you are regardless of type. Things that ruin a relationship are usually found in ALL types.

    I am curious about your relationship with an ESTP. The only ESTP I have regular contact with is my mother - but our relationship with one another seems to be very charged, either extremely good or extremely bad. Regardless, I think we have a pretty solid connection in some weird way. In what way was an ESTP your best romantic connection?

  7. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by quietgirl View Post
    I understand the S/N difference - I grew up in a family of S types (with the exception of my brother). I just find that there are ways I can connect with an S type - they just don't involve abstract theory or deep rooted discussions. I have enough N type friends to satisfy that sort of need for me, though. For my ISTP boyfriend - we do a LOT of activities together. It helps that I have an athletic bent & can generally keep up with him, but we definitely connect in this way. I also feel he grounds me a bit & get my heads out of the clouds - he gets me out DOING things in the world instead of thinking about the world. Since I have the natural inclination to act upon m thoughts, it's like I get an extra push. We both share a mutual attaction and appreciation for one another & provide one another with stability and loyalty - which is a HUGE core relationship need for the both of us. He's also willing to do things that I enjoy - namely sitting around playing scrabble & doing puzzles (haha) - even though it's not exactly his strength & I am willing to do the same for him. If anything, it's broadening my horizons a bit - and honestly? Learning about how he differs from me & finding ways to connect regardless DOES fulfill some weird INFJ need for me.

    In relationships, I've dated only one N (INTP) and while the connection was overwhelmingly amazing, the semantics of a relationship really didn't work out. We wanted different sort of things, which surely happens with anyone regardless of type. I've also been interested in other possible N types, but I've always had the same issue. I find I get more of my core relationship needs fulfilled by S types and while we certainly connect on different levels - I get that abstract intellectual connection with my friends. I don't need it in a relationship to feel fulfilled. This could very well be attributed to needing the sort of things in a relationship that were provided to me by my S type parents, though. My idea of what a relationship should look like has certainly been inadvertantly influenced by them.

    I guess I just don't think people should be discredited because of a difference in how each person thinks. If you find yourself an open minded enough S or N, he or she may not see things the same exact way that you do but they will respect you & love you for being who you are regardless of type. Things that ruin a relationship are usually found in ALL types.

    I am curious about your relationship with an ESTP. The only ESTP I have regular contact with is my mother - but our relationship with one another seems to be very charged, either extremely good or extremely bad. Regardless, I think we have a pretty solid connection in some weird way. In what way was an ESTP your best romantic connection?

    I also don't think the S/N is pivotal to a relationship. It may surely help, but it's more of the individuals that match, because what makes the bond authentic is the individuals that accept, appreciate, try to understand, and love each other, not types they're under.


    With the ESTP, let's just say that if I never met him, I never would have experienced "todays".

  8. #38
    ^He pronks, too! Magic Poriferan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deep rain View Post
    But more back on topic - I guess what Magic Poriferan meant was that a relationship can be difficult (or distant) enough when you don't share the S/N trait, let alone every other letter being the opposite.

    I've actually heard that an INFJ/ESTP relationship can be very electrifying (in a good way) though. Not saying this is true; just what I've heard. But for a side note, my best romantic connection was with an ESTP.


    That is what I meant.
    I said that because I had just suggested the ENTP.
    I thought it might have seemed a little strange that I said to avoid a type with only one letter different.
    Hence my comment.

    And electrifying is far from the same as successful.
    Last edited by Magic Poriferan; 11-18-2007 at 08:05 PM. Reason: Typo
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  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic Poriferan View Post
    And electrifying is far from the same is successful.
    But can be rewarding in its own tingly way.

  10. #40
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    Quote Originally Posted by Magic Poriferan View Post
    That is what I meant.
    I said that because I had just suggested the ENTP.
    I thought it might have seemed a little strange that I said to avoid a type with only one letter different.
    Hence my comment.

    And electrifying is far from the same is successful.
    Well I think electrifying can be taken in various ways, not just one short term fling way. So, successful... in an electrifying way.

    For types, I always thought ENTP was the best for INFJ. But because you define who you are, not your type, IMO it'll mainly come down to the persons themselves that make or break a relationship.

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