wrt to topic:
I find that the enfps who drive me nuts are the ones who share a different enneatype from myself. It leads to a very different set of core values, and I often find that thier approach is very annoying and offensive to me. Understanding this gap makes it easier to not be annoyed, but it still grates. So close but so far.
Things that annoy me about other enfps:
1. the difficulty isolating thier value stake in an idea from the idea. Thus they cant take even slight criticism of the idea without becoming defensive.
2. The willingness to use flirtation or emo prompting in a work situation. On your own time, who cares, but at work, this is really stupid. I have seen a couple of older enfp males rise to executive positions using this technique (the girls get written off as stupid flakes with this tactic and dont go far). The enfp males use it and it feels very sleezeball. I think it is an so/sx thing.
3. Using values to establish "feeling" groups. These are ways to exclude people who present you with data that conflicts with what you WANT to believe or challanges a value bound idea you hold. Thus they are judged as not sharing the correct "feeling" tone and the enfp begins to exclude them. It is very similar to how an Fe user might exclude another, except it is more passive in nature. It is a nasty protective mechanism and stupid, as they are shielding themselves from information that is needed to solve the problems.
4. The inability to be direct and straightforward. Instead the enfp will talk around issue or just avoid it to keep people happy. As an example I was managing a product which was not manufacturable, yet we kept taking orders for it-then were unable to deliver. I repeatedly explained this to my enfp supervisor-who was too much of a coward to directly convey this information to the COO. Additionally enfp managers can be too chickenshit to be direct in giving employee feedback.
5. externalizing stupid values on others-we all have our weird little values, but it bothers me to see them externalized onto others that are very different from us.