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Thread: infj Fe in relationships with S.O.

  1. #11
    Senior Member Array the state i am in's Avatar
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    Feb 2009
    5w4 sx/sp


    also: cafe and fidelia, those were very helpful responses. i think a method would be a productive start, step in the right direction.

  2. #12
    Mr. Blue Array entropie's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    3w2 so


    Quote Originally Posted by Kalach View Post
    Unless I am mistaken
    Was there a time you were actually not mistaken yet ?
    Johari / Nohari

    "How dreadful!" cried Lord Henry. "I can stand brute force, but brute reason is quite unbearable. There is something unfair about its use. It is hitting below the intellect."
    ~ Oscar Wilde - The picture of Dorian Gray

  3. #13
    Filthy Apes! Array Kalach's Avatar
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    Dec 2008


    Quote Originally Posted by entropie View Post
    Was there a time you were actually not mistaken yet ?
    As an Ni dom I am fond of saying that I know everything.

    "No, you don't!" people say.

    "Yes, I do," I say. "I may not know it all right now, but I know everything."

    So cool that Ni is timeless and can get away with saying that. Pain in the ass that Te should be keeping track of time. But Ni is the Dom, so boom, there it is.

    Did everyone notice that every reply was something about making logical assessments of feeling?

    (Aha, but, INFJs have Ti as tertiary, if they're going to talk, they're going to find energy and hope in logic! To say they make Ti requests is an easy win. And true.)


    (And this isn't helping.)

    (I guess.)

  4. #14
    Senior Member Array SciVo's Avatar
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    Aug 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by the state i am in View Post
    the problem is when my emotion turns really negative, and i only see negative connections. it just totally overpowers Ti, and i feel like an upside turtle. i just want to hide and wait it out on my own, or disappear completely.
    Remember o thou turtle that "should" is a work for a god to use. Who are you to say what the universe wants? Likewise with "always" and "never", you puny mortal! You should never anger the gods with the presumption of using words reserved for them alone, for they will always take offense (and expiation from thine hide) for such hubris.

    In the event that my normally-trustworthy intuition has failed me, then never mind.
    INFP ~ Fi/Ne/Ni/Te ~ 9-2-4 sp/so

  5. #15
    Senior Member Array statuesquechica's Avatar
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    Jul 2009
    9w8 sx/so


    Quote Originally Posted by cafe View Post
    The things that used to totally drive me nuts were the P/J conflicts. Over time, he has learned the negative effects of not making timely decisions and I have learned to present things to him in such a way that doesn't make him feel overwhelmed or pushed.

    Does that help?
    Yes, thanks for your response and especially highlighting the above P/J conflicts that arise. There was a very interesting thread about how ENTPs make decisions and the length of time the actual decision is made from the origin of the problem posed. Some posters made some illuminating points about their decision-making process and the value in waiting, leaving options open, if that is possible.

    Kalach: I totally relate to your comment about an INFJ finding "hope and energy in logic", just reading your comment gave me a moment of peace. I often find myself taking solace in looking at a problem by applying it to the scientific process (my former science teacher roots run deep).
    I've looked at life from both sides now
    From up and down and still somehow
    It's life's illusions I recall
    I really don't know life at all

    Joni Mitchell

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