I'm having a great time in my life right now, partying, making new friends, going out and doing stuff I've always wanted to do.
I was pretty introverted for the last few years, I wouldn't talk to anyone without a pc to block the personal part of it, no one aside from a few close friends.
Yet I felt like I was in control, I had a grip on my life because I shut the world out it was easier to maintain that control.
Now I feel like I am mired in chaos again, and I don't like it. I am tempted to just close the door again, to hide from the chaos until I regain control again because my choices in the face of fun couldn't be more idiotic at times.
I know if I don't stop swimming out there something really bad could happen, my financial choices recently have all been geared towards fun times, and I have to say I have shirked some major responsiblities in favour of the fun aspect, there is always a price in the end.
It goes like this:
"Berbs, fancy going notting hill carnival, we can hit the clubs saturday and sunday night, and get wasted through the day partying on the streets through sunday and monday"
me = *well I have saved up this money for a new vacuum cleaner, but you know what, screw that, let me go blow this wad of cash in 2 days flat, because that sounds like fun*
My isfj friend paces the fun she has, once in a blue moon she will consider her proper duties done, and maturely set aside some "fun money" .
The sensible, and yet boring way to do things, since she rarely goes out and that doesn't look like fun to me anymore.
Anybody else find that they only do chaotic fun, and not sensible fun?
I'm drowning here.