User Tag List

First 1234 Last

Results 21 to 30 of 35

  1. #21
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    1w2 so/sx
    Posts
    11,106

    Default

    I can relate to the OP. My ESTJ made me feel extremely looked after and cared for. He was very reliable, good at figuring things out, extremely capable at anything he set his mind to, and wanted to learn how to do things himself. He took care of the detail things that I hated doing. My ISTJ dad is somewhat the same. We also have some overlapping values. On the other hand, communication styles are completely different and most of the things I care to talk about and vice versa are completely unrelatable. I wouldn't recommend it in some regards, but in other ways NFs and SJs make an excellent team.

  2. #22
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    I'm an NF and I don't know that I've ever felt physical chemistry with an NF male (though there may have been one...) though I have been attracted to NTs. My longest relationships have all been with xSFx guys, I swear, and this goes all the way back to high school.

    I don't think it's crazy at all, and I wouldn't worry too much that you can't make a LTR work with an SJ or an SP. A lot of the compatibility stuff is bullshit, and even people who seem *really* into MBTI agree that it's bullshit. Compatibility is a very individual thing. SJs, in a general sense, have stabilizing influence and that can actually be good for serious relationship, ya know.

  3. #23
    Permabanned
    Join Date
    May 2009
    MBTI
    ISFP
    Enneagram
    6w7 sx
    Socionics
    SEE Fi
    Posts
    25,301

    Default

    Ha ha I just noticed that I replied to this thread almost a year ago, and said something similar.


  4. #24
    Senior Member Rebe's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2009
    MBTI
    INFP
    Enneagram
    4sop
    Socionics
    IEE
    Posts
    1,505

    Default

    I like caveman types A LOT - stp/ntj - i don't like 'em cute pretty boys

  5. #25
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Posts
    4,128

    Default

    I also find myself attracted to ISTJ guys. I only noticed this trend in retrospect because throughout my life I don't think I had a type really (MBTI or otherwise) except that I always liked men who were kind. I honestly considered if my ISTJ attraction had to do with my upbringing or something. The trouble is when I am with them I can't tell if as my partner they are unable to fulfill me emotionally or if my emotional needs are simply unfulfillable.
    the formless thing which gives things form!
    Found Forum Haiku Project


    Positive Spin | your feedback welcomed | Darker Criticism

  6. #26
    Senior Member something boring's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    nnja
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    EII
    Posts
    279

    Default tangent, sorry

    Quote Originally Posted by Rainbows View Post
    I like good people regardless of type.
    Doesn't everyone?



    Anyway, relationships are a subjective matter. What one person looks back on with a smile, another may have considered sheer and all-consuming hell. I think I've most likely dated a variety of different types, as most people probably have. While I'm sure that the bad relationships were bad at their core, and for reasons unrelated to type, I can certainly see how type may have created challenges that otherwise would most likely not have been present. For example, one of the aforementioned exes constantly asked me with near hatred, "Why can't you just live in the real world?!?". Certainly, the hatred was based on something entirely different from type, but the question, ultimately; was most likely type related, he lived in the here and now, demanded immediate results, and needed specific examples to understand what was going on. I'm sure that with concerted effort over a long period of time, this could have been resolved, if the relationship had been based on something solid, or if both people had actually cared. I can only speculate about type in terms of most of my exes anyway, the only one who ever took the test was INFP. I can't say that I've ever had a particular "type" in any sense of the word, I tend to like people for what makes them unique, and I'm usually attracted to personality traits rather than physical features. The two examples I listed before were the ones I can think of that the attraction was instant, it hit before I knew who they were. It was something about their mannerisms, the way those two carried themselves and interacted with the world that got to me, but with both, I hadn't a *clue* who they *really* were until it was too late. Perhaps that's what attracted me to them in the first place.

    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    I can't tell if as my partner they are unable to fulfill me emotionally or if my emotional needs are simply unfulfillable
    This resonates within me in this context, and others...


    Quote Originally Posted by Vasilisa View Post
    I honestly considered if my ISTJ attraction had to do with my upbringing or something.
    An additional concept to consider might be that ISTJs tend to outnumber some of the other types in the world, so you could be more likely to meet them than some other types.


    Quote Originally Posted by marmalade.sunrise View Post
    Ha ha I just noticed that I replied to this thread almost a year ago, and said something similar.
    There's something to be said for consistency, right?
    Last edited by something boring; 05-06-2010 at 12:04 AM. Reason: increasing verbosity
    "Don�t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." - Howard Thurman


    [SIGPIC]http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l110/evillinclinations/fortune45.gif[/SIGPIC]

    ...and yes, I'm still on about that...






  7. #27
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    infj
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    2,460

    Default

    there's desirability and then there's energy.

    growing up, i've always been attracted to esfps. they're so in their body, i always like 7ws6s (their enthusiasm and energy are the perfect foil to my 5w4 gravity and fascination with darkness), and we usually have complimentary skills, desire for new experiences (though mine are mental vs physical). it's very grounding, and the presence of Se brings me back into the world and puts me in my body.

    as far as desirability goes, enfps win for me easily. i'm attracted to their sense of style, their imagination, and their feminine aura (anima animus). usually very active and energetic. i don't know any so/sp enfps, mainly so/sx and sx/so. i've never actually dated an enfp, but i can sense that there is more awkwardness for a period with two N doms, especially who are both F types.

    energy isn't JUST about being in your body, it's also in how you communicate. i think balancing the sx/sp/so instincts are just as important as N vs S in physical chemistry. probably more so. sp types are distant, so types are more companionable, and sx types are more piercing. energy is not just about being in your body and feeling physically awake. it's also about desiring and communicating desire.

    i also like infp 4w5 style. i like Ne imagination, how it creates new possibilities all the time. a huge advantage Ne women have, i find, is that they seem like they make themselves new, update, change, all the time.

    the most natural energy high i've ever felt was probably with an entp woman. i don't think i've ever felt so directly challenged, which is exciting.

    the gender thing changes the equation. i think it takes more time to warm up to an F man or a T woman. they're still a further deviation from the norm, which generally means it takes a little longer to learn to like it and appreciate its strengths.

  8. #28
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Posts
    2,808

    Default

    I've always had something of an Se fetish, particularly when combined with Ti. I find practicality and realism grounding, and I prefer long-standing relationships and stability, which perhaps have seemed more promising from types less prone to dreaminess.
    Last edited by Charmed Justice; 05-10-2010 at 04:17 PM.
    There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

  9. #29
    Senior Member something boring's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    nnja
    Enneagram
    4w5
    Socionics
    EII
    Posts
    279

    Default wow, this got long. Sorry.

    Quote Originally Posted by the state i am in View Post
    the most natural energy high i've ever felt was probably with an entp woman. i don't think i've ever felt so directly challenged, which is exciting.
    I think that the sprinkling of ESTPs in my past is the closest I've come to this feeling, probably because I'm pretty sure I've yet to meet an ENTP in offline life. I've had a tendency in life to surround myself mainly with people with whom I had very little in common, but to only really open up to those who seemed to "get me", they were people with whom I had much in common; mainly NFs and NTs. I know only a small handful of Ns offline, though, and that's probably part of it. I was thinking about it today and I decided that the most likely explanation for their numbers is the challenge they present. I was also thinking that maybe it's a subconscious effort to improve weak Se... Anyway, I think the first thing that attracts me to them is that they are fully alive and in the moment. I've had... um... days of that, but it's certainly not a regular occurrence. Additionally, the ones I knew were quick talkers, and I love that. They always knew what to say to make me laugh. Of course, the other side of that is knowing exactly where to thrust the proverbial emotional knives later. Not to mention someone who seems to be constantly mad at you for "living in the clouds". I think maturity is a huge factor, though.
    Last edited by something boring; 05-06-2010 at 10:45 PM. Reason: grammar
    "Don�t ask what the world needs. Ask what makes you come alive, and go do it. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive." - Howard Thurman


    [SIGPIC]http://i94.photobucket.com/albums/l110/evillinclinations/fortune45.gif[/SIGPIC]

    ...and yes, I'm still on about that...






  10. #30
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    MBTI
    INFP
    Posts
    256

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by the state i am in View Post
    there's desirability and then there's energy.

    as far as desirability goes, enfps win for me easily. i'm attracted to their sense of style, their imagination, and their feminine aura (anima animus). usually very active and energetic. i don't know any so/sp enfps, mainly so/sx and sx/so. i've never actually dated an enfp, but i can sense that there is more awkwardness for a period with two N doms, especially who are both F types.

    energy isn't JUST about being in your body, it's also in how you communicate. i think balancing the sx/sp/so instincts are just as important as N vs S in physical chemistry. probably more so. sp types are distant, so types are more companionable, and sx types are more piercing. energy is not just about being in your body and feeling physically awake. it's also about desiring and communicating desire.

    i also like infp 4w5 style. i like Ne imagination, how it creates new possibilities all the time. a huge advantage Ne women have, i find, is that they seem like they make themselves new, update, change, all the time.

    the most natural energy high i've ever felt was probably with an entp woman. i don't think i've ever felt so directly challenged, which is exciting.

    the gender thing changes the equation. i think it takes more time to warm up to an F man or a T woman. they're still a further deviation from the norm, which generally means it takes a little longer to learn to like it and appreciate its strengths.
    I can relate to being attracted to SP individuals because (I've given this some thought) of their ability to take care of the details of life that I could care less about and they provided a sense of stability were attractive to me, at first. In the long term, though, the S/N divide caused communication problems that could not be overcome, though I still love both these men and enjoy talking with them. I agree with the bolded--I'm deeply attracted to and have feelings for an NF or NT now. The connection was instant and the physical chemistry incredible. NFs, or at least for the two of us, there is that awkwardness that you mention, and it has gone on for a long period of time. Both of us are mutable and fluid (he more fluid than I). For two NFs or Ns, it can be difficult to get the ball rolling (who tells whom first that they are attracted or have feelings) but once it does, I feel it would be incredible. Deep sigh. I'm comfortable around Ss and I enjoy their ability to be in the moment and pay attention to the things that make the world work. But in a relationship, I won't do it again. The feeling of stability isn't worth the emotional desert that I found myself in.

Similar Threads

  1. [NF] What function of INFJ makes her attracted to players?
    By shanix in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 10-28-2015, 02:27 AM
  2. [MBTItm] ESTPs are you attracted to INFJs?
    By Mertonchavez in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 18
    Last Post: 06-10-2012, 11:52 AM
  3. [INFJ] Spin-off thread! INFJ males! Who are you attracted to?
    By SinistralPal in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 7
    Last Post: 06-15-2010, 04:43 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO