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[MBTI General] The Care and Keeping of Your INFX

Coeur

New member
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
237
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
I'd say that INFPs and INFJs are interesting enough that other types need to read a how-to guide on how to take care of us properly. Feel free to post any relational dos and do nots that you assume that are specific to your type. You can also post personal attributes and patterns that you've observed in your relationships. Note that these are guidelines and generalizations, not rules.

I'll jump into the fray later. :D
 
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Phantonym

Guest
Hehe. The thing is, I've never considered myself to be that delicate or complex. I think that the instruction "Handle with care" applies to everybody.
 

Coeur

New member
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
237
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Hehe. The thing is, I've never considered myself to be that delicate or complex.

There. People pleaser that I am, I changed it to "interesting." :p Surely you think that you are interesting.
 

Cenomite

Systematic chaos
Joined
Nov 30, 2008
Messages
623
MBTI Type
ENTP
Eh, I just act like myself no matter who I meet. If they like me awesome, if they don't then oh well. Sure I change my attitudes a bit depending on the person, but keeping a set of special rules to follow seems kind of pointless for a friendship/romantic thing. If I need to somewhat significantly change how I act or do things for a particular person, then I probably shouldn't be friends/in-a-relationship with that person. Maybe a set of notes would be good (ex: If an INF acts X way, then this could mean Y).

Something like this in the workplace could be pretty cool though.
 
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Phantonym

Guest
Surely you think that you are interesting.

Hehe...:thinking:

ex: If an INF acts X way, then this could mean Y

If an INF has a cold nose, then this could mean that they've caught a cold.


I don't know, I see that people are so different, regardless of type, that there cannot possibly be any universal guidelines.
 

BlackCat

Shaman
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
7,038
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
INFX people are really complicated for no reason a lot of the time. If you look at other types, they get along in the world just fine and aren't complicated.

The trick is to break these traits and become normal. But a lot of people won't do that. I don't see how being complicated, overly emotional and hyper sensitive are good traits.

If you aren't like that then great!
 

Coeur

New member
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
237
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
The trick is to break these traits and become normal. But a lot of people won't do that. I don't see how being complicated, overly emotional and hyper sensitive are good traits.

There are advantages to these traits in reasonable doses, but you can't let them run rampant. It is immature for me to say: "I'm sensitive. Now, I have the right to throw a tantrum." Instead, I need to think thing such as: "As a sensitive person, maybe I am overreacting to this situation. Maybe I should look at it objectively" OR "I need to set proper boundaries in this relationship so that I don't get hurt." Etc.
 

Coeur

New member
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
237
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
I don't know, I see that people are so different, regardless of type, that there cannot possibly be any universal guidelines.

Thus, overthrowing Meyer-Briggs. XD I understand that there will never be foolproof rules. It's just fun to compare similar types of people and see where it leads.
 
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Phantonym

Guest
Thus, overthrowing Meyer-Briggs. XD I understand that there will never be foolproof rules. It's just fun to compare similar types of people and see where it leads.

:D Yup, overthrowing :doh: Me and my skepticism.

And I agree with you that it is fun to compare types :)
 

BlackCat

Shaman
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
7,038
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
There are advantages to these traits in reasonable doses, but you can't let them run rampant. It is immature for me to say: "I'm sensitive. Now, I have the right to throw a tantrum." Instead, I need to think thing such as: "As a sensitive person, maybe I am overreacting to this situation. Maybe I should look at it objectively" OR "I need to set proper boundaries in this relationship so that I don't get hurt." Etc.

Indeed.

I can see that you aren't like that because you didn't take my statement the wrong way. :)
 

Coeur

New member
Joined
Jul 13, 2009
Messages
237
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Indeed.

I can see that you aren't like that because you didn't take my statement the wrong way. :)

Life is too short to release the hounds on every person with an opinion. XD
 

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
Joined
Aug 19, 2008
Messages
3,067
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
:confused:

INFX people are really complicated for no reason a lot of the time. If you look at other types, they get along in the world just fine and aren't complicated.
Of course, the other types have no problems in the world. The key is to be just like them.

The trick is to break these traits and become normal. But a lot of people won't do that.
Normal? By whose standards?
 

Scott N Denver

New member
Joined
Apr 25, 2009
Messages
2,898
MBTI Type
INFP
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4w5
INFX people are really complicated for no reason a lot of the time. If you look at other types, they get along in the world just fine and aren't complicated.



I think a lot depends on what a person wants from life, and expectations [ one's own and other peoples and "societies"]. Some people are innovators, others walk around in mini-skirts and go-go boots and say things like "I love starbucks! I'm so perky and popular!"

Perhaps I am jumping off from your post to something else that you didn't mean, but I'd say its important for people to both be able to 1) contribute what they can, and 2) to "adequately function" in society. People will obviously have different ideas of what it means to "adequately function" in society. As a person with an advanced science background let me try to give an example. There are LOTS of very smart scientists [and engineers] out there with great ideas that would push technology and the like. But, and here is the big but, LOTS of them suck so much at "communicating" that they aren't able to convince someone else to support/fund their research. So nothing happens until those scientists [or engineers] learn how to write/talk/communicate in a way that will mean something to the non-scientists to approve and/or fund science/engineering research. And just so no one tries to complain that "Scott is being mean to INTJ/INT's/scientists/engineers again", let me point out that I have talked about this topic with several people in my professional career and they have all agreed and said that they had seen such sorts of people "many times."


I think a lot of interactions in "society" require very little depth. For example, going to starbucks to get a cup of coffee doesn't require any detailed psychological evaluation or you proving that you thoroughly understand multivariate calculus or any deep heartfelt conversations about your feelings.

The trick is to break these traits and become normal. But a lot of people won't do that. I don't see how being complicated, overly emotional and hyper sensitive are good traits.

Complicated people are probably multi-faceted, which might mean they are good at lots of different things. I think the issue is "complicated" something that lets you bring extra skills/assets/abilities to the table, or something that makes you a pain for others at the table to deal with. Really, do we want 1-dimensional people or to deal with them? :sleeping: "OMG Paris Hilton is my favorite person, I want to grow up to be JUST like her"

Overly emotional, I guess it depends on what you mean by "overly", but if I think of people that volunteer with animals, or children, or foster children I'll bet many of them could be described as "overly emotional." Also, I'll bet that lots of people that are very nurturing could also be described as "overly emotional". Maybe you are referring to "emotional theatrics" or people who get thrown around by the whims of their emotions? Don''t those kinda people make good actors and performers though???

Hyper sensitive, I think many of my comments about overly emotional apply here as well.

I still may have missed what you meant though???
 

Scott N Denver

New member
Joined
Apr 25, 2009
Messages
2,898
MBTI Type
INFP
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4w5
Who told you about my puppy weakness?

Virtually ALL people have puppy weaknesses! Those that don't are probably psychopaths or the like :newwink:

note: some people have kitten weaknesses, which is an acceptable substitute for puppy weaknesses
 

BlackCat

Shaman
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
7,038
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
:confused:

Of course, the other types have no problems in the world. The key is to be just like them.

Normal? By whose standards?

Bolded- Not really what I meant.

And "normal" probably wasn't a good term to use, but whatever.

My point was that having these traits and having them take a negative effect on you should be avoided. Great post btw Scott.

Lots of the time I've seen (and observed for myself in real life) NFs create a lot of unnecessary issues for themselves for no apparent reason, just because they were either overly emotional/overly sensitive (in a sense that these traits backfired) and/or way too complicated.

And what I'm trying to say is that you should strive to not let those things as an NF take control of you and cause issues for you. And this relates to the OP because "special treatment" usually means that these traits need to be catered to, but the way I see it is that they are just getting in the way.

Having a difficult time projecting what I really mean sucks. But in this case it might be due to the fact that I'm doing some hardcore multitasking.

note: some people have kitten weaknesses, which is an acceptable substitute for puppy weaknesses

I have kitten weaknesses. :D

funny-pictures-its-santa-cat.jpg
 

Skyward

Badoom~
Joined
Jul 3, 2008
Messages
1,084
MBTI Type
infj
Enneagram
9w1
Its all really about balancing the need to fit in at least enough for good communication and fulfilling your own abilities. Some people are very bright but ruin their chances because they want to fit in with the wrong crowd, and some people are very bright but since they never developed the 'fitting in' skills, they can't contribute as effectively. (as Scott said)

I think the term becoming 'normal' meant becoming more capable in the society's norm.
 
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