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  1. #131
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by EnFpFer View Post
    With ENFPs, we're kinda interested in everyone..
    I see people throwing that kind of line left and right and I can't help but feel it smells a bit untrue, really. I don't see ENFPs making much of an effort to understand things that go directly against their Fi, that often. ENFPs shrug people off as mean or deluded or judgmental just as often as any other type.

  2. #132
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sytpg View Post
    Because you aren't self-centered. You know there are other people around you that think slightly or even radically different. Because you aren't naive in other aspects and because this one deserves just as much attention. More so because you're a feeler and you care about others' feelings. And because you know exactly what kind of response being flirting is going to cause, and you can read between the lines.






    Oh, missed this post. But yeah, you shouldn't. If all participants are up for it sure. If you have a clear conscience and you don't feel you are leading people on. But, hey, I'm not here trying to tell anyone what to do. I'm just saying that for every action there's a consequence, and that people should be honest with themselves first and foremost if they want to ignore all that.


    But you mentionned that ENFPs need time to mature. The insight that not everyone interprets things like them takes time. At first, you realize that they don't react the way you would've, but you have no clue why or when this will differ. Things that come naturally to you, you don't even realize you should be questionning that others are different on this. And the same is true for other types btw. SJs don't understand why it is that someone would like to be chaotic. NTs cannot understand why anyone would not consider logic a priority or how you cannot be good at logic. NFs don't get that someone wouldn't be interested in people, at all, and wouldn't want to form connections, except for mating purposes. It's a journey we all take, to realize that others do not perceive things the way we do, and to discover how other *do* perceive them exactly
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  3. #133
    Nickle Iron Silicone Charmed Justice's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lady X View Post
    yeah! exactly it's like...oh...you don't really like me enough as a person to want to be my friend...you only pretended to because you thought we'd go out.
    Right, and for EXXP types, it seems we put "friendship" in much higher regards than many other types. So to say you really don't want to be our friend unless we're putting out can be like a total slap in the face. I would be really hurt if my guy friends were like,"Sorry Pfer, you're married now, which means the likelihood of us ever having sex with you or marrying you just decreased to almost nill. What's the point in talking to you anymore chic? See ya when we see ya." I would have been devastated, and would have lost a lot of friends, seeing as so many of them are men. Glad I don't know any of these,"What's the point in being friends with a woman..." dudes.
    There is a thinking stuff from which all things are made, and which, in its original state, permeates, penetrates, and fills the interspaces of the universe.

  4. #134
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    Also, I have to say that I did like the girl I met for who she was. I liked her personality and her interests. That's why I even talked to her. We had many things in common. However, my point in getting to know her was not to make a friend, but to have a relationship. Is that wrong? It seems sensible to me.

  5. #135
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    But you mentionned that ENFPs need time to mature. The insight that not everyone interprets things like them takes time. Especially because it happens in steps. At first, you realize that they don't react the way you would've, but you have no clue why or when this will differ. Things that come naturally to you, you don't even realize you should be questionning that others are different on this. And the same is true for other types btw. SJs don't understand why it is that someone would like to be chaotic. NTs cannot understand why anyone would not consider logic a priority or how you cannot be good at logic. NFs don't get that someone wouldn't be interested in people, at all, and wouldn't want to form connections, except for mating purposes. It's a journey we all take
    Of course it takes time. But constantly justifying your actions and seeing nothing wrong with them, and saying "well, it's the journey towards enlightenment" just smells like irresponsibility. It's like "poor me, I can't help being who I am, but surely I can't be blamed for that. I can only blame the mean TJs that judge people harshly and without feelings. Me? I'm on the path to something better. I'm not perfect. I can't be expected to be perfect. So I'll just keep doing what comes naturally to me."


    Basically I don't understand the point in what you just said? What are you trying to say? That it takes time? I'm not saying it doesn't.

  6. #136
    Senior Member Keps Mnemnosyne's Avatar
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    Why talk to men? Neither you, Mr. Time nor I can successfully mate with them. Why talk to grandmothers or your best friend's girlfriend? Socializing is more than mating. If you argue evolutionarily, it is to derive a benefit or avoid a conflict between members of that society. You talk to your neighbor about putting up a fence regardless of whether your neighbor is male or female because it helps you. This may be a fairly recent development, but that is more due to the fact that women have power in society today not present in the past. May I also ask how old you are?
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  7. #137
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    ^^*smiles*

    It is, to INTJs. Since you guys don't really gain your strenght from other people. However..we're not like you
    Our strenght is connecting with others. You use your Ni+Te outside of your job as well, don't you? You use it on people? Even though it's not the best tool to use for that? Coz that's who you are

    What if we told you that it's immoral and evil to use Ni+Te in working with people, as they're not the best tools for that? What if we told you that your way of being is in fact wrong? What if we told you that we're going to tie your hand behind your back and you're not allowed to use what you're good at to achieve what you want?

    That's what you're doing to us

    And you can have expectations on how things should be between people, from your point of view till the cows come home, as an TJ tends to be, but FPs will never fulfill those expectations as being who we are and having the freedom to do so is just about sacred to us.
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  8. #138
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
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    Well, Sy, your tune sure has changed from the last thread.

    I'm all for people being who they are, but when an issue keeps coming up, it's only wise to look into it instead of automatically dismissing it.

  9. #139
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    Quote Originally Posted by Keps Mnemnosyne View Post
    Why talk to men? Neither you, Mr. Time nor I can successfully mate with them. Why talk to grandmothers or your best friend's girlfriend? Socializing is more than mating. If you argue evolutionarily, it is to derive a benefit or avoid a conflict between members of that society. You talk to your neighbor about putting up a fence regardless of whether your neighbor is male or female because it helps you. This may be a fairly recent development, but that is more due to the fact that women have power in society today not present in the past. May I also ask how old you are?
    I believe you're misunderstanding what I am saying. Evolution has made it that we have to socialize to survive. So we socialize with those of the same sex and people in our families. But when it comes to the aspect of socializing with people of the opposite sex outside of our families, its a different story. Why don't you pick up a book about the social behaviors of other mammals or other animals in general. They approach members of the opposite sex for really only one reason...to mate.

  10. #140
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    Oh, I'm 21 years old...since you asked. And putting up fences is a different story...that is not about socializing but about doing something in order to show your territory...if you use your intuition, its really about survival. If I have to talk with women (lets say an insurance dealer), its something I must do, not about socializing or about mating. But it's just as likely that when speaking with her (as if one or both of us find each other attractive), then there will be some sort of sexual tension there. This is really the reason why mankind (for ages) has forbidden contact between men and women on a casual basis...its not about man having power over women, but to avoid these situations...why do you think that divorce rates and cheating rates are so high these days?

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