but we have different balances of thinking and feeling. we have a totally different perceptual system, at opposite ends of the spectrum. we are directed outward and very detail-oriented in the world as a result. our introverted judgment function is an unconscious one (Ti). this grounds us to ourselves and what we think is TRUE for us. clarifies the story that creates some of our sense of purpose, internal stability, calling, direction, etc. whereas Fe is directed outside of ourselves, connecting with others perhaps somewhat discriminantly, but ultimately focused on them (their story, their needs, their information) rather than our own way of relating to them. on how they relate to us and each other, at large. which makes it difficult, i find, to be in touch with my overarching, long-range feelings (/wants).
this is not an impossible problem. but i do find that it makes for some specific challenges. tho, as stated in the thread, probably not as problematic as just becoming healthier, improving in the ability to let go, to stop foreseeing SO HARD all the time, to be more in the moment, connect with Fe more freely, and allow a sense of conduct to guide you through the rough patches and moments of un-knowing, un-feeling, or wariness/moodiness.
nevertheless, in love, i often feel like my skin is inside out. that i am seeing only my own outside, or that recognizing myself in the mirror is the only way to know how i truly feel, what i truly want, what i truly am in this relationship. clearing away my pre-conceptions and meditating on the other person helps too, when alone, bc i become more in touch with what/who they really are apart from me
and what i want in a very ephemeral Fe moment/mood.