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[MBTI General] Understanding your weaknesses

The Grand Chameleon

New member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
144
MBTI Type
ENTJ
Enneagram
3w2
Why do people constantly deny their weaknesses? If one can truly understand where a weakness lies, energy can be accurately directed at the source to alleviate it. No one should be afraid to admit ineptitude, for this is the first step in growth and strength. The second, action.

I'm not really sure how to direct a discussion regarding this...I suppose it was more of a pit stop on a meandering thought trail. Despite direction, I would fancy other opinions :yes:
 
G

Glycerine

Guest
It's a painful process and most people would rather not face it. When I engage in that process, it's just very hard to swallow.
 

INA

now! in shell form
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
3,195
MBTI Type
intp
Do you mean generally or in the context of the forum?

How do they constantly deny it?

The flip side is people who revel in a weakness as a point of pride.
 

IZthe411

Carerra Lu
Joined
Jul 19, 2009
Messages
2,585
MBTI Type
INTJ
That's one reason I came to MBTI- to learn my natural weaknesses, and recognize them so that I'm aware of them and can work to correct them. I also am not afraid to share them with those I am closest to, so they can leave me alone about why I'm not so touchy feely.
 

scortia

New member
Joined
May 23, 2009
Messages
201
MBTI Type
INFJ
Denial of personal weaknesses is something I never understand. But it's probably because I can't relate, NFs being ridiculously self-aware.

Recognizing your weaknesses and growing from there should be in everyone's top five things to do, and yet, it rarely is.
 

Poki

New member
Joined
Dec 4, 2008
Messages
10,436
MBTI Type
STP
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Its one thing to recognize, but another to fight it. Our weakness drives us to feel inadequate in life. If we fight our true weakness non stop it could drive us into depresion or a feeling of not being able to adequate to handle lifes problems. If your grip was weak would you test it hanging from a rope 10 ft of the ground? Or would you test it by grabbing the rope and just lifting your feet of the ground. The other thing is does testing it really strengthen it or just beat failure into your head. Is there other ways to go about strengthening it other than submiting yourself to something your gonna fail.
 

Lookin4theBestNU

New member
Joined
Apr 23, 2007
Messages
801
MBTI Type
ENFj
Enneagram
2w3
Most folks really want to believe they are good people/well-balanced/healthy and all of those things. Confronting reality (not to mention accepting it) is difficult for many people as it is hard to really be objective about yourself. Most peoples measuring sticks are their intentions rather than their actions. One of the easiest ways to see this is when people take the MBTI. They will tend to score themselves higher in the traits that they admire/aspire to be. I say this knowing full well that I am included in this :). Telling people 'you know you say you are this but your posting shows this more' never really works. It doesn't work IRL either when talking to people about their weaknesses even the ones you have relationships with...not excluding deep long term ones. However letting people know what it is you observe can sometimes open the door and let them start thinking about it themselves. Until someone truly arrives at such conclusions themselves it's unlikely change will be in the works for them. For example I really wanted to be ENFP for quite some time. I didn't want to believe I was a total J and all of the negative views that can be associated with that (rigidity, opinionated etd.). I wanted to be fun, soulful and playful only! Accepting that I'm all of those things only a small part of the time was hard for me. I think most people forget about the action and growth part. Avoiding growing pains is pretty natural I've come to believe. Avoiding discomfort in general seems to be the norm. Pushing those usually self-imposed boundaries and stepping out of comfort zones usually sucks for awhile. I like the feeling of freedom that comes from it though as their tends to be some underlying fear that comes with facing your weaknesses. I have tons of weaknesses so its a life long process and one that is never going to be finished.
 

Halla74

Artisan Conquerer
Joined
Jan 20, 2009
Messages
6,898
MBTI Type
ESTP
Enneagram
7w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/so
Some folks do not seek to identify their weaknesses because they have ZERO self awareness.

Some ID their weaknesses when they manifest as a huge calamity in their lives (Gambling, alocoholism, etc.)

It's one thing to find out what your weaknesses are.

It's quite another to systematically: (1) prioritize them in order of severity that they should be corrected/improved/mitigated/etc., and (2) identify methods of improving such said weaknesses, and (3) formulating a plan to work on these things while moving forward.

Self improvement does not happen overnight. It must be a quest started from within a person for it to yield fruit.

I'm in the process of trying to become better able to use "feelings" to guide me in my life. Give me a blank card to write to my Mother on her birthday and I will fill it with loving prose. Ask he how I feel at any moment in time and the answer will be "Great!" or "Outstanding!", but if I am asked to make a decision on something based on how I feel about it...I'm dead in the water. :doh:

I hear this is common for those with strong thinking preferences. So here I am. :D
 

forzen

New member
Joined
May 7, 2009
Messages
547
MBTI Type
INTJ
Me and my weakness are drinking buddies, I talk to him every weekend while intoxicated.

But on the serious side people don't face their weakness because failure taste bitter and your body has a habit of telling you to "flee". They rather hide from it till the moment they have no choice but to face it.

Like the above poster, part of the reason i learned about MBTI was to get educated about who I am. It was a bit of a shocker when i first read my personality type for the first time, the accuracy was uncanny and it described me(minor detail here and there, but the general idea was intact). I was hesitant to put any label on myself,but with more research i finally excepted the general theory.
 

Poki

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Me and my weakness are drinking buddies, I talk to him every weekend while intoxicated.

But on the serious side people don't face their weakness because failure taste bitter and your body has a habit of telling you to "flee". They rather hide from it till the moment they have no choice but to face it.

Like the above poster, part of the reason i learned about MBTI was to get educated about who I am. It was a bit of a shocker when i first read my personality type for the first time, the accuracy was uncanny and it described me(minor detail here and there, but the general idea was intact). I was hesitant to put any label on myself,but with more research i finally excepted the general theory.

Its not always forced though. There are 2 options. Is it driven by greed to get what you really want or is it driven because your forced to face it? One is a choice the other is not. If it is driven by greed it goes through the thought process of is it worth it. If its worth it you will choose to face your fears and fight your weakness.
 

Gloriana

Patron Saint Of Smileys
Joined
Aug 2, 2009
Messages
949
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
6w5
To say I've never been afraid or uncomfortable with my weaknesses would be a lie, but I guess I have always felt like I owe it to myself to examine them. I guess it is part of that "striving for truth" thing. I WANT the truth even if it might make me cringe at myself for awhile.

I think the main trick for me has been learning not to beat the living crap out of myself for my weaknesses or lecture myself like I'm some criminal for having them. I think sometimes people just will not go into that territory because of how much criticism is just floating around out there toward weaknesses, whatever they might be.

I grew up in a very critical family myself, so I think if one has grown up feeling like they had to apologize for so much it can be a challenge if someone asks them to examine weakness willingly. Not to mention that for every weakness you face up to and deal with, there are seemingly three more to come after that sometimes, hehe.

Really though, I think sometimes that a person's unwillingness to face weakness might be that ingrained things in a lot of families that 'weakness = failure'. It's destructive but it's out there, you know?
 

King sns

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enfp
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sp/sx
I don't think that everyone is constantly hiding their weaknesses..
And, ironically enough, I think that people who are in denial that they have weaknesses are the ones where the weaknesses are blatantly obvious... I think it can be an age thing, too.. With maturity people can be aware of their weaknesses and actually try to counteract them.
 

King sns

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And some people are quite the opposite.. They seem to be in denial of their stregnths.. I think this can be equally bad if not worse.. since, well. If you don't realize that you have stregnths then you sure as hell aren't going to use them properly.
 

wolfy

awsm
Joined
Jun 30, 2008
Messages
12,251
And some people are quite the opposite.. They seem to be in denial of their stregnths.. I think this can be equally bad if not worse.. since, well. If you don't realize that you have stregnths then you sure as hell aren't going to use them properly.

It's a lot easier to see your weaknesses than your strengths. I agree, it's just as bad to not see your strengths.
 

Lux

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I think most people see their weakness' or at least have a glancing knowledge of them. I also think people get stuck in their perceptions. They see their weakness(s) as part of who they are rather than shedding them and becoming who they could be. So they accept them, perhaps even downplay them. I think most people want to be better but see it as an uphill battle so they just accept it as their fate. I wish everyone could use their weakness' as launching pads rather than badges of failure, but some people like them. Pinning a badge on yourself tends to be easier than jumping into unknown.
 

Poki

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I think most people see their weakness' or at least have a glancing knowledge of them. I also think people get stuck in their perceptions. They see their weakness(s) as part of who they are rather than shedding them and becoming who they could be. So they accept them, perhaps even downplay them. I think most people want to be better but see it as an uphill battle so they just accept it as their fate. I wish everyone could use their weakness' as launching pads rather than badges of failure, but some people like them. Pinning a badge on yourself tends to be easier than jumping into unknown.

What is your weakness if I may ask?
 

Lux

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I definitely have more than one:) but I try to know where I am flawed and to change. I think my main weakness at this point in my life is not trusting other people with my true thoughts. I really have a hard time with that. I'm also way to accommodating. Getting onto this forum and actually typing what I think about different things is my way of trying to move ahead of the aforementioned weakness. As I said before i have many weakness but I think just constantly working on them can help. I try. How about you?
 

Poki

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I definitely have more than one:) but I try to know where I am flawed and to change. I think my main weakness at this point in my life is not trusting other people with my true thoughts. I really have a hard time with that. I'm also way to accommodating. Getting onto this forum and actually typing what I think about different things is my way of trying to move ahead of the aforementioned weakness. As I said before i have many weakness but I think just constantly working on them can help. I try. How about you?

My weakness is not taking control of situations because I dont know how some people will feel. I dont want to step on someone elses toes when they may be trying there best. I dont want to cause an inadequate feeling in others. I wait to long and the situation has passed and I no longer have the ability to do what I should have done.

Do you mind if I act J and tell you what I see as a weakness for your type?
 

fill

"Everything in its place"
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Jun 28, 2009
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507
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entp
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But what is a weakness? Is it a disadvantage, or is it simply the bad side of something that would otherwise be good?

For example, I might not tell others my true feelings about them because I may believe it would hurt them, which could be seen as a weakness, but that same "function" has an unconditional love for them that would go great lengths for their sake.
 

Lux

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I don't mind a bit. The more information people (I) have from various sources the more they (me) learn.

Your weakness sounds like tact and kindness:), but I understand what you mean by doing more harm by waiting than taking control of the situation.
 
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