Typical INFP problem -
I've improved my confrontation skills a little bit as I've gotten older, but I still really balk at any situations in which confronting someone is involved. Typically, the more emotional and important the situation, the more I shy away from confrontation. I let problems and issues slide for way longer than I ought to, until things are really bad. It's not healthy for myself or for others involved.
I tend to get really flustered and upset in situations where I have to have heated discussions about personal matters, especially if I feel like people are hostile. I sort of clam up and lose all train of thought. Sometimes I literally get sick and can't eat just anticipating a confrontation. When I feel worried to this level, I try to write letters instead, to take the time to really organize my thoughts. I feel much more comfortable with that method. I've had friends and family members get angry at me for writing letters to try to express my thoughts and feelings rather than talking to them directly.
1) Are you of the opinion that writing letters is a cowardly cop out? Would a letter vs. a face to face conversation offend you?
2) Do you have any advice or strategies to work toward improvement in this area of confrontation? Is it something I just have to learn to get over myself and do, or are there ways I can build up to being better at it?