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[MBTI General] INFJ Compatibility - Why the INFJ/ENTP dynamic is hands down the best.

Istbkleta

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That's because you're looking at people through your typology monocle, and it's rather narrow perspective.

I am sorry if you feel boxed in. That wasn't my intention.

Those are just very broad perspectives. I wish there were better words to connect with the endless supply of individual choices than maybe/perhaps/possibly. If there are - I don't know them, not that I planned on ... you know. My apologies.
 

1487610420

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I am sorry if you feel boxed in. That wasn't my intention.

Those are just very broad perspectives. I wish there were better words to connect with the endless supply of individual choices than maybe/perhaps/possibly. If there are - I don't know them, not that I planned on ... you know. My apologies.

Yes, you damn well better.

 

the state i am in

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INFJs seem attracted to ENTPs and I find this strange. Apart from the usual attraction to Ne and seemingly similar Fe/Ti languages.

Perhaps INFJs like telling and inventing people's stories so much that an empty and malleable ENTP is like a canvass for them.
Maybe they get a kick out of trying to fill the inside of an ENTP with good proper filling.
Maybe they are trying to use ENTPs as a vehicle to deliver their personal visions to the outside world.
Maybe INFJs are afraid of how the world crushes their vision and find looking at it through Ne safer and more manageable.
Maybe to some extend some INFJs wish they would be more in touch with the world (Ne) and more orderly inside (Ti).

the "usual" you mention is the most unusual experience. that of feeling completely understood. to feel completely comfortable as you are.

as for what you describe, all of those fit for my experience.

OK :popc1:

Maybe ENTPs like to think of themselves as good individuals. A parent aux Fe enables them in this regard.
Maybe ENTPs would like to have complex inner selves and welcome the INFJs filling them with their dreams and expectations. Or perhaps see themselves through the INFJs' eyes that make them appear more complex.
Maybe ENTPs want a long term vision and INFJs provide it with their Ni.
Maybe ENTPs need to feel loved and approved of and the INFJs provide some of that. Socionics supports that ISFJs provide it better, maybe because they can also assist with the anima(us) Si and ESTPs can help INFJs with Se. If you prefer to believe any of these theories is your choice.

Maybe ENTPs like to think they have deep, lasting feelings and INFJs enable that self-perception. IMO there is a lot of communication issues as each sees their own parent in the other but possibly overestimate his/her decision making authority in the person themselves. Esp. at the usual first relationships age 20-30. An INFJ will analyze and Ti is evident but not as autonomous like ENTPs' Ti in its decision making authority. At the same time a stronger connection with Ti in ENTPs might mean that their feeling of self at that stage of their lives is more strongly attached to "Truth and clarity" than to Fe's "Harmony and others". Vice versa in many younger INFJs who would sacrifice concise speech for the sake of others' emotions. The great differences in what is meant and what is understood appear hidden in the apparent similarities.

Maybe ENTPs need to talk about themselves and INFJs are more willing to listen than most others. They are introverts with strong interest in other people.
Maybe ENTPs don't want to think about their past and maybe they see in INFJs a ready-made connection between the past and the future (Ni).

I don't want to argue. Don't bother. Just throwing in some perspectives.

i also see these relating very well to the infj-entp dynamics i have experienced and witnessed. the basic gist for me is that this seems like a perfect teacher for my needs. in general, ntps, their developer skills, are what i need most in order to live the life i want to live, to be who i want to be. waking up my own ability to tell my own story and stay with my experience but still trust in the context that is being woven together, to recognize a complexity that allows me to feel open-ended and receptive to the infinite possibilities of life without feeling like i am simply trapped in particulars that have lost their universalizing meaning.
 

DisneyFanGirl

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I believe you're talking about immature ENTPs. It takes us awhile into our 20s to really shine. INFJs love me.

Actually I'm talking about immature INFJs. One of them has an insufferable superiority complex and she acts like she's supposed to be serious all the time. And when she DOES decide to let loose, she's always controlling herself to make sure she's not TOO crazy. This would drive both ENTPs I know completely nuts. And both of them are actually fairly mature, I don't see any of the "ENTP arrogance" in either one.
 

Istbkleta

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what i need most in order to live the life i want to live, to be who i want to be

This is just a what-if


What if it's not about developing ourselves into what we ought to be but rather it's about what we discover we are?
What if there is no personal development, no higher purpose to life, no pyramid of needs?

I am tricking you little bit here, I feel playful :happy2:

Just think about it
 

the state i am in

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This is just a what-if


What if it's not about developing ourselves into what we ought to be but rather it's about what we discover we are?
What if there is no personal development, no higher purpose to life, no pyramid of needs?

I am tricking you little bit here, I feel playful :happy2:

Just think about it

where there's an it there's an ought.

i recognize the value of presence a great deal. as my biggest challenge, i see why i am how i am when particularly without presence. i recognize the value of all functions. with Ne, the added benefit is that it is simply easier to communicate about that kind of presence (to globally contextual for an Ni user), although in practice, as a practice, the natural kind of mirroring that happens when i am around others is useful with either Ne or Se, if i have the presence of mind to use them as a metronome. but it's different when you also feel like you can not only play catch but also do team juggling with a seemingly endless array of connections happening in all rhythms.

i know the look i get from Se types. it can be a bit demoralizing/alienating, but it's also a sensitive issue for me because it can get frustrating when your best games aren't playable with others/you feel like a crazy person.
 

Allie

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Compelling... and insightful -- Thanks for sharing.
 

Cellmold

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I'm not sure this dynamic exists. I get along with some ENTP's and not with others, although id wager that whether or not I get along with them has nothing to do with their type in this theory.

Of course the idea that a type necessarily inclines towards certain pairings is odd to me.
 
S

Society

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Did Mane start this thread?

*ahem* background cover *ahem*

when it was 2009
it was a very good year
a very good year
for Ni dom girls
who gamed multi-players...
all that anxious air
that untied so fine
when it was 2009..

but no - didn't even know of MBTI at the time, and haven't being anything close to a type-fetisher until half way of finding out i was already married to one, and obviously.. went quite the other way since :p
 

527468

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Same typing error as in the INFP ideal match thread. Ne and Ni do not complement one another; they disorient one another.

INFJ's ideal match is with their own Ni, Fe, Ti, and Se types. (the other functions are shadows for a good reason if you're familiar with what Jung continuously said.)
 

Tiltyred

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Eh, I dunno. I got my ENTP boss 12 years ago because he used to come and chat with my then-boss, so I had the opportunity to observe him for some time before I made him aware of myself. He intrigued me. When I talked to him, he interested me. When I proposed that I be his assistant, he immediatelly accepted. Then i had to have a knock-down-drag-out fight with the boss I had, so I could work for the ENTP. Fortunately, the ENTP was senior to the boss I had, so he was able to prevail for us in that situation. 12 years in a job is a long, long time. I'm bored, so bored I could die. I went in and talked it out with my ENTP boss. He knew exactly what to say to rekindle me. What Vasilisa said way upthread is right -- he's a vagabond and I'm his home. ENTP needs that, or at least the one I know does. He needs a wife at home, too. He really suffered when he was between marriages. So I guess I get to see an ENTP from a perspective that some don't see -- as an assistant, not a romantic partner -- as a sort of friend, but with a built-in distance -- very good for observing. They only appear to be flighty. They're actually intensely faithful in their hearts. I can understand that in a romantic experience, INFJ might feel neglected while ENTP runs merrily off to be entertained, charm and be charmed, but they do seem to need their safe place, and if you are willing to provide it, you can rest there comfortably for about as long as you like. If you want something, ask for it. I haven't been turned away once.

Mine is good with arguments, too. We can yell at each other and still make sense, and there are genuinely no hard feelings after. We can and do say pretty much just what we think, and it's fine. I feel that overall the give-and-take is good. I have many flaws -- he sees them all and accepts them as coming with the territory, and vice-versa. Which is refreshing. I think that is a good word for the effect on me -- he's refreshing.

I don't know that I would marry one, but I've been happy in a work relationship with one for longer than I've been happy ever with anyone. FWIW. I fantasize that I would like an INTJ in my personal life, but who knows. ENTP is very engaging.
 

1487610420

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Eh, I dunno. I got my ENTP boss 12 years ago because he used to come and chat with my then-boss, so I had the opportunity to observe him for some time before I made him aware of myself. He intrigued me. When I talked to him, he interested me. When I proposed that I be his assistant, he immediatelly accepted. Then i had to have a knock-down-drag-out fight with the boss I had, so I could work for the ENTP. Fortunately, the ENTP was senior to the boss I had, so he was able to prevail for us in that situation. 12 years in a job is a long, long time. I'm bored, so bored I could die. I went in and talked it out with my ENTP boss. He knew exactly what to say to rekindle me. What Vasilisa said way upthread is right -- he's a vagabond and I'm his home. ENTP needs that, or at least the one I know does. He needs a wife at home, too. He really suffered when he was between marriages. So I guess I get to see an ENTP from a perspective that some don't see -- as an assistant, not a romantic partner -- as a sort of friend, but with a built-in distance -- very good for observing. They only appear to be flighty. They're actually intensely faithful in their hearts. I can understand that in a romantic experience, INFJ might feel neglected while ENTP runs merrily off to be entertained, charm and be charmed, but they do seem to need their safe place, and if you are willing to provide it, you can rest there comfortably for about as long as you like. If you want something, ask for it. I haven't been turned away once.

Mine is good with arguments, too. We can yell at each other and still make sense, and there are genuinely no hard feelings after. We can and do say pretty much just what we think, and it's fine. I feel that overall the give-and-take is good. I have many flaws -- he sees them all and accepts them as coming with the territory, and vice-versa. Which is refreshing. I think that is a good word for the effect on me -- he's refreshing.

I don't know that I would marry one, but I've been happy in a work relationship with one for longer than I've been happy ever with anyone. FWIW. I fantasize that I would like an INTJ in my personal life, but who knows. ENTP is very engaging.


Hm, interesting narrative. However, eh, it does strike me that it does seems like a very attractive place to be, like you said, contemplating. The perspective is bound to change when you're down in the mud. I think people's intrinsically selfish demands/expectations towards one another can vary greatly depending upon context, i.e. work vs interpersonal vs personal.

bjay7ed
 
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Tiltyred

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Yes. As I said, I'm not sure how it would work in a more personal relationship. There could be murder involved. :D
 

cafe

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If I had to be with an extrovert, ENTP would be my first choice, I think. But you'd have to pry my INTP out of my cold, dead arms.
 
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I'm not sure this dynamic exists. I get along with some ENTP's and not with others, although id wager that whether or not I get along with them has nothing to do with their type in this theory.

Of course the idea that a type necessarily inclines towards certain pairings is odd to me.

it's odd to me as well, but there is something to it:
  • with one infamous INFJ in my life, without even knowing the MBTI, she has grown up frantically loving many fictional characters that fit the ENTP stereotype quite perfectly, such as Jarlaxle Baenre (forgotten realms), Tyler Durden (fight club), Hans Landa (inglorious bastards), etc'.
  • on my end, again without knowing the MBTI, i have grown up loving & adoring INFJ song writers & authors, like Gene Wolfe, Harman Hesse, Leonard Cohen, Paul Simon, George Harrison, etc'.
given that, the seed of truth behind the myth has more to do with a higher frequency and intensity of initial chemistry and connection then it has to do with the promise for long term sustainability.

that's being said...
 

Tiltyred

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Mane, did you write that?
 

the state i am in

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Same typing error as in the INFP ideal match thread. Ne and Ni do not complement one another; they disorient one another.

INFJ's ideal match is with their own Ni, Fe, Ti, and Se types. (the other functions are shadows for a good reason if you're familiar with what Jung continuously said.)

the quadra matches have a different kind of comfort. ideal has to do with valuing specific ideas of things over others. there is great diversity over ideas and the value attributed to such ideas within an imagined infj community.

Ne and Ni are disorienting in that they are a different kind of bandwidth for communication that is difficult to ground with a sense of absolute finality. but it definitely blows my hair back. and in terms of inspiring a partnership, i find it fucking awesome.
 
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