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  1. #181
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    The only relationship I had with an ENTP was platonic. It was at a writers' event, everyone was completely drunk, except for me, because mainly I was pretending to be drunk so I could observe everyone who's drunk (it's funny to be the only sober one.)

    Anyway, this guy just sat beside me, smiled real wide and said "It's fun to be pretend-drunk, isn't it?" We've been friends ever since, he critiques my poems, I critique his prose. It all works out. He's very very witty, and he seems to like the fact that no one gets his jokes except for me. (ie when no one gets it he just looks at me and says to everyone, "see, he gets it."
    Yes, I take it with no cream and no sugar.

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  2. #182
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
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    Default this is so deeply personal it makes me ill

    I lived out a grand love story with an ENTP. I cant add any analysis of the function examination, because Iím new to all that and I canít say it is hands down best pairing because that seems impossible to know. But if you care to hear some of my experience I will share it, because evidently its more than just a special experience for me, its an example of a special pairing (if not special, then topical). You might think the following is just NF romanticism, and maybe it is, but he expressed all this to me, I didnít invent.

    The relationship between my ENTP and this INFJ was very powerful and very consuming and very illuminating.
    I fell for him right away. I never considered it was because we had complimentary personality types. I wish I had all this important information about INFJ +ENTP relationships then.

    We were young, so some of those ENTP maturity issues manifested. And naturally I took things to personally too often and was probably too clingy. But we both felt deeply understood and loved and connected. It actually wasnít hard for him to bring me out of my shell. But he did run a lot. I know for a fact he was freaked out by his feelings. Keep in mind he had trust issues from trauma/rejection. And when he pulled his stoic act it killed, absolutely killed me. Like truly surprised that I'm the one still living now. But as violaine put it, we fell into trust. He treasured me and spoiled me. I spent hours just enjoying his presence while he worked hard mastering whatever it was he was into at that particular time and I protected him from the world. It was never that dependent feeling NFs grow to resent. Physically it was glorious, and I could speak to that more in the other forum I suppose, but I think that physical intimacy for my ENTP was maybe when he was most (trying to figure out how to phrase this so that it is accurate and not ridiculed) able to feel and express pure love and emotion. He must have stank of sex appeal, too because he had so many people interested in him; girls and boys both. He was definitely the vagabond, searching, searching for new experiences.

    I miss my ENTP. The world lost someone very special.
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  3. #183
    Member Tofu562's Avatar
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    =(

  4. #184
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    and I protected him from the world

    -Vasilisa
    Ive seen someone else say something very similar about an ENTP they dated (think it was pinkpirahna).

    Can either one of you elaborate on this? How did you 'protect' him from the world. Why did you think he needed to be protected. Just wondering.

  5. #185
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Hello....

    Hope everything is happy here on this very long thread...

    Umm, can you guys point to how the Ni-Ne interaction feels in the case when TiFe/FeTi judging functions are matched? How would this differ from an ENTP with an ISFJ or an ESTP with an INFJ-both of which work out pretty good as well, as I have heard.

    Thanks!

  6. #186
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy Puppy View Post
    Hello....

    Hope everything is happy here on this very long thread...

    Umm, can you guys point to how the Ni-Ne interaction feels in the case when TiFe/FeTi judging functions are matched? How would this differ from an ENTP with an ISFJ or an ESTP with an INFJ-both of which work out pretty good as well, as I have heard.

    Thanks!
    the type of inspiration is as close as i can gets. the rationale is made up of the same parts so information is already in the right form. the different perspective of Ti-Fe (for me) is so refreshing, it helps stimulate my Ti to catch up. i learn methods for problem-solving, and just always want to compare notes with entps bc i learn how to be a better version of myself. while still maintaining myself and my own unique advantages as infj (vs entp). i think we both immediately feel that way, based on my experiences with 5 or 6 entps. i will say that only 4 or so really hit the mark, their intuition was focused on similar things and a kind of grandiose vision for the universe. it's also really easy for me to be emotionally/mentally honest and not have to check any of my thoughts at the door, i can say pretty much everything, the best included with the worst. there's just like a different set of premises that you both immediately accept, about life, love, the universe, everything. i feel the interaction helps me clarify what i see beyond those tricky and misleading concepts.

    Ti is so different than Fi. when Fi hits you the right way, tho, when the person has values that are similar to the values you have, Fi is great too. Fi feels more secure, trusting, absolute. it feels slower to change. i don't know if this is right but it seems like it has a different relationship to belief.

  7. #187
    4x9 cascadeco's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy Puppy View Post
    ...

    Umm, can you guys point to how the Ni-Ne interaction feels in the case when TiFe/FeTi judging functions are matched? How would this differ from an ENTP with an ISFJ or an ESTP with an INFJ-both of which work out pretty good as well, as I have heard.

    Thanks!
    For myself, I can't really fathom being in a longterm, really close, intimate relationship with an ESTP. I certainly know it's possible (there are posters on here who are in that relationship or know of them), but it seems the way of approaching the world would be so different - different priorities, different visions/goals - that could easily lead to unfulfillment or misunderstandings too much of the time, probably for both parties.

    One of my best friends, an INFJ, was married to an ESTP for 5 yrs and they recently divorced; communication was hugely problematic for them, and her deeper intellectual needs/self really never surfaced with him because he just didn't communicate in that way or see the world that way, and the things he cared about (which translated into what he valued spending his time doing, or spending money on) were things she didn't care about at all. She said they initially got together and it was great on an activity-based level -- they did things, they had fun together (which is why they ended up together - their *shared experiences* were rewarding and fun) - but when it came to a deeper bond, on an intellectual/emotional level, it never happened. They couldn't really talk through things.

    Obviously it ends up being an individual thing in the end, and individual preferences - so it'll never be cut and dry. Some ENTP's might be quite fulfilled/happy with ISFJ's, just as some INFJ's would be with ESTP's. In general, though, I think in both of these relationships a deeper bond would be difficult to develop - it certainly wouldn't come spontaneously, and I think it would involve quite a lot of work, and perhaps compromise, on both ends. It really depends on whether both care enough or want to try to build that. Also, both might resolve that they'll fulfill those deeper needs in other relationships - friendships - rather than needing all of those needs fulfilled by their partner. In that case, too, the relationship might work. It just depends on what both ultimately want out of it.
    "...On and on and on and on he strode, far out over the sands, singing wildly to the sea, crying to greet the advent of the life that had cried to him." - James Joyce

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  8. #188
    Symbolic Herald Vasilisa's Avatar
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    Default protection

    Quote Originally Posted by SUPER View Post
    Ive seen someone else say something very similar about an ENTP they dated (think it was pinkpirahna).

    Can either one of you elaborate on this? How did you 'protect' him from the world. Why did you think he needed to be protected. Just wondering.
    I will try my sincere best.

    This gets tricky because now this is my interpretation of what I think he felt. So consider the type of the source.

    I definitely was not trying to protect him in a mother/smother type way. We were young & insane.
    I protected him in the most basic way in that I was devoted and never cheated on or dumped him. He had had those experiences before. Plus devastating family rejection, Stuff like that can embitter a person.

    He was so fascinating to me and eccentric too. I loved that. And most of the arty types I hung out with appreciated that. But the majority of people in his day to day life did not appreciate, and I know he got some ridicule and labeled weird by people he didnít even know. Itís like that saying the nail that stands up gets pounded down. His job was really really not the place for an innovative type personality. So I tried to protect his urge to be an individual by just appreciating and letting him do his things and not demand all his attention all the time.

    I feel like since he was an ENTP he was always willing to go out there and have adventure and especially try to meet new interesting people. And he was really generous to people and they genuinely liked him, but sometimes I felt they wouldnít be there when he needed them. I can think of a time he was literally under attack and these people he called his friends did not defend. I did. A lot of it seemed so shallow to me, unfortunately. I can relate to dustmite30 somewhat, in that occasionally he would go off and straight up leave me behind, but afterward, and especially if people disappointed him, he would always return to me and in that way I feel that if he was a vagabond then I was his only home.

    Even though he was seeking out new experiences and people connections, I donít think that many got to see the real him. Like it was stated somewhere in this thread regarding ENTPs, he hated to show vulnerability. I never used any of his vulnerabilities against him, even when he was breaking my heart. I tried to protect him from shutting off that side that would let people in and practice kindness.

    So that is some of what was behind the protect statement. Obviously if you take the end into account I did not protect him. Sorry its not concise or spelled out with functional analysis. Take from it what you will.
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  9. #189
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    Quote Originally Posted by Happy Puppy View Post
    Hello....

    Hope everything is happy here on this very long thread...

    Umm, can you guys point to how the Ni-Ne interaction feels in the case when TiFe/FeTi judging functions are matched? How would this differ from an ENTP with an ISFJ or an ESTP with an INFJ-both of which work out pretty good as well, as I have heard.

    Thanks!
    I can speak to the difference between ESTP and ENTP interactions from the tiny sliver of my own experience. My father is ESTP. I always found him perplexing and fascinating but in a way that was mundane at the same time; in the physical realm and not the mental with which I am automatically fascinated. Extremely cunning and canny though, like many of the ESTPs I know. He has a physical presence that I think ESTPs in general share. They are the kind of people you notice when they walk in a room (because they like it that way). It's interesting to me but not something I want to emulate. He is a risk-taker and his own man but very much a man of the senses so it's more overt. I am a risk-taker and very much my own person but it's something I keep to myself. With ESTPs there is a disconnect when I get going on the theoretical. Theoretical conversations even while interesting to the ESTPs I know are just tolerated after a while. Being that I have a taste for those above anything else, it feels like swimming through mud to me to make that deep soul connection. Our minds touch but it's with some effort, though in this endeavour there is a reward and a way of bonding.

    With ENTPs there is never a disconnect, we just go deeper and deeper. It seems like there is more of a shared whimsy and no need for things to materialize in the real world. ESTPs and I can end up boring each other after a while and need a little break.

    Vasilisa touched on something when she used the word vagabond... There is a vagabond connection between the INFJ and the ESTP and ENTP. The INFJ feels unconventional but doesn't express it much, the ESTP likes to cut a swathe and the ENTP is quite the little trail-blazer and neither ETP seems to care who knows it. The ESTPs I know kind of can't resist letting people know how they best others, ime. Hence, there is always a dimension of competition. Not a bad thing it's just something I don't particularly gravitate to and makes me more wary around ESTPs than ENTPs.

    This is not exhaustive, nor in function-speak (sorry). I get along with people from both types well but the shared liking of living up in one's head is delicious for interaction.

  10. #190

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    My INFJ was and still is to me everything Vasilisa was to her ENTP; completely. I can relate so much, it's uncanny.

    What happened in the end?

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