User Tag List

First 7891011 Last

Results 81 to 90 of 131

  1. #81
    Seriously Delirious Udog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    INfp
    Enneagram
    9w1 sp/sx
    Socionics
    INFp None
    Posts
    5,295

    Default

    Yeah, it's a combination of an intense interest in what makes a person tick and their ability to tailor fit their approach to an individual. They relate to a person by becoming what that person needs.

    There's something subtle too, that took me a long time to notice. INFJs notice what you respond to, and slowly encompass a personality that consists of those elements. If someone desires and responds to someone that is slightly giggly, they become more giggly. If someone responds to challenging and edgy humor, their humor starts to develop an edge. The degree of difference can be subtle or extreme, depending on the INFJ.

    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    With INFJs, the interest (maybe) precedes the valuing (maybe) precedes the romantic pursuit. Outwardly, they may all appear as the same step to the receiving party, but in our minds we are definitely at varying levels of interest. Disclaimers aside, I'd like to think that once I reach stage three (romantic pursuit mode) my "aggressive availability" becomes blatantly apparent.
    This was so insightful to me, and clearly explains some things I've experienced. By the time most INFJs enter that final stage of romantic pursuit, the other person has invested alot into the INFJ to get there, and often welcomes it.

  2. #82

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Udog View Post
    Yeah, it's a combination of an intense interest in what makes a person tick and their ability to tailor fit their approach to an individual. They relate to a person by becoming what that person needs.

    There's something subtle too, that took me a long time to notice. INFJs notice what you respond to, and slowly encompass a personality that consists of those elements. If someone desires and responds to someone that is slightly giggly, they become more giggly. If someone responds to challenging and edgy humor, their humor starts to develop an edge. The degree of difference can be subtle or extreme, depending on the INFJ.
    I am a different daughter to my INTP father than to my ESFJ mother I assure you. The same goes for my siblings, my aunts, my grandmother, my friends etc. It may sound complicated, even dishonest, but I assure you it is not. With different people, different facets of my own personality are embraced to create the most harmonious interaction. It is beyond critical analysis; it is completely natural. I find myself having to hold back from doing this too much. It's just too easy for me.

    I often find that of all the places I've lived (and there are many), people in the area often remark how I seem like I "belong" there, or "You don't sound like you're from <insert former residence>,... or even the plea from new friends and acquaintances "Don't leave, you fit in so well!" etc. INFJs can be human chameleons, which is why I'm shocked when I hear how many people claim to know xx number of INFJs.


    Quote Originally Posted by udog View Post
    This was so insightful to me, and clearly explains some things I've experienced. By the time most INFJs enter that final stage of romantic pursuit, the other person has invested alot into the INFJ to get there, and often welcomes it.
    It isn't just about the other person earning that level of trust; we know it's us earning yours too.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  3. #83
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    4 sx/sp
    Socionics
    EII
    Posts
    3,067

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    I am a different daughter to my INTP father than to my ESFJ mother I assure you. The same goes for my siblings, my aunts, my grandmother, my friends etc. It may sound complicated, even dishonest, but I assure you it is not. With different people, different facets of my own personality are embraced to create the most harmonious interaction. It is beyond critical analysis; it is completely natural. I find myself having to hold back from doing this too much. It's just too easy for me...INFJs can be human chameleons, which is why I'm shocked when I hear how many people claim to know xx number of INFJs.


    I wonder why we do this (I know you said it is beyond critical analysis, but still!). Is it only to create harmonious interaction?

  4. #84
    Once Was Synarch's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2008
    MBTI
    ENTP
    Posts
    8,470

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    INFJs can be human chameleons, which is why I'm shocked when I hear how many people claim to know xx number of INFJs.
    I don't type people. I give them the damn test.
    "Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."

  5. #85
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    4 sx/sp
    Socionics
    EII
    Posts
    3,067

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Synarch View Post
    I don't type people. I give them the damn test.
    I do too. But in doing so, I've found some people aren't the best at knowing their own selves.

  6. #86

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley View Post


    I wonder why we do this (I know you said it is beyond critical analysis, but still!). Is it only to create harmonious interaction?
    Ni+Fe duckie!

    Ni = intuits the needs of interactive subjects (the group, the individual, the self, the present environment) constantly and effectively
    Fe = applies that knowledge in a practical way through rewarding, encouraging, discouraging, penalizing, flexing, sharing, commiserating, and listening as needed (nearly whatever is required, so long as it does not conflict with our values)

    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  7. #87
    Revelation Lauren Ashley's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    4 sx/sp
    Socionics
    EII
    Posts
    3,067

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by iwakar View Post
    Ni+Fe duckie!

    Ni = intuits the needs of interactive subjects (the group, the individual, the self, the present environment) constantly and effectively
    Fe = applies that knowledge in a practical way through rewarding, encouraging, discouraging, penalizing, flexing, sharing, commiserating, and listening as needed (nearly whatever is required, so long as it does not conflict with our values)

    I was thinking that. I wonder where Ti and Se come into this? I would think Se would allow us to be aware of our surroundings in the moment and adjust.

  8. #88
    violaine
    Guest

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by laudanum225 View Post
    i just recently got out of a bad bad relationship. i must say, with elevated intuition levels it is quite mysterious how i could even get into something like this. :O
    but then again, i find myself always very much attracted to unstable, unbalanced ppl that obviously need help... i guess its a helper-syndrome disguised as romantic attraction.

    noticed that a lot of guys think i am arrogant/ mean/ lesbian, just because i will not succumb to their primitive overtness. but yeah, that is what most mating dance type flirts are for me, primitive. hmm...
    Heh, yeah if someone is overt it just makes me back away at equivalent speed. I always feel like a wild horse who gets spooked if just the right approach isn't taken.

    Quote Originally Posted by laudanum225 View Post
    would you say as an INFJ that ppl in need are a prime target to get involved with/ seduce?
    I think it's that you feel concern and then grow close and the lines are blurred. But I've never been able to maintain a relationship that started with me feeling pity primarily. I need an equal and unquestionable attraction and I make sure there is no ambiguity if the reason I am close with someone is because of having empathy for their plight.

    Quote Originally Posted by Sky is BLUE! View Post
    Oh yes, I am very familiar with this as well I try to fight it but I guess it's in my nature. I often get an almost unstoppable urge to just hug a person who I see is feeling really down (I don't actually hug people, I try to avoid it like it's the plague). Sort of taking on to myself some of their worries. Maybe then they'll feel a bit better. While still knowing that it won't actually help. It's just a feeling I cannot escape.

    So, I hear you, fellow sponge!
    Yeah... sometimes the urge is overwhelming, as a way to reassure somehow and to express fellow feeling.

    Quote Originally Posted by mwv6r View Post
    Is it really that unusual for INFJs to engage in meaningless sex at some point in their lives?
    As you mentioned I think it can definitely happen coming out of a relationship that knocked you off-balance.

    I can't do casual relationships, which is something I've only recently truly accepted. I used to bemoan it but I get attached. Everything about the person becomes dear to me and I want to nurture and protect... I can't bear hurting people and I can't compartmentalize sex and love very well for long.

    Also I am not satisfied with what feels to me like 'empty' sex. I need the other dimension and the friction that comes with love. It's boring to me otherwise. (NB: My POV, not commenting on others' sexual proclivities.)

  9. #89
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    MBTI
    INFJ
    Enneagram
    2w3
    Posts
    26

    Default

    @ mwv6r:
    my bad relationship was also an emotionally unstable and abusive ISTP!!!! :O
    aaaaaaaaaah aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaargh

    @ sky:
    I can't hug ppl really either hahaha.. i mean, i dont do it very often. always do something like a perfect circle with my arms around them, to hug but not actually touch hehehhehe
    i always seem to miss the occasion or am so startled when someone shows intention to hug.. o.O

    @ivakar: agree about the principle of INFJ as human chameleon. definitely. It can definitely become second nature in just a second. some mean ppl call me smoothtalkerrrrrr ;P
    But I feel like the older INFJs grow, the lesser they may do this.

  10. #90
    Senior Member the state i am in's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    MBTI
    infj
    Enneagram
    5w4 sx/sp
    Posts
    2,460

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Lauren Ashley View Post


    I wonder why we do this (I know you said it is beyond critical analysis, but still!). Is it only to create harmonious interaction?
    Fe is how we assert ourselves. Ni shows us a myriad of ways to get there. Ti shows us what will work.

    the way yoga instructors just walk around and kind of tweak people. chart the course. send them in a slightly new direction. we prefer to walk on water when possible.

    we value being recognized more so for our perceptions than our extraverted qualities. our Ni ideas, interpretations, concepts, ideals, beliefs, atttitudes. it makes the extraverted aspect of our lives secondary to our introverted goals, dreams, and desires. we don't have internal judgment to hold on to as much as internal ideas. we are j and left-brained. our sense of self is more fluid and perceptual than judgment based. our integrity is in action, bc our beliefs are capable of so much constant adaptation and evolution, and the judgment to identify with is on the outside in the real world. eventually we have to let go of knowing/certainty of ourselves (for the Fe is outside of us and our control, is constantly changing and elusive and impossible to give account for) and just move more fluidly, very tao/the way/zen/judo/etc.

Similar Threads

  1. [INFJ] How to win back an INFJ guy
    By kotachi in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 01-27-2013, 10:55 PM
  2. [INTP] How to seduce as an INTP
    By laughingebony in forum The NT Rationale (ENTP, INTP, ENTJ, INTJ)
    Replies: 398
    Last Post: 04-05-2010, 02:45 AM
  3. [INFJ] How to deal with an easily hurt INFJ...
    By Wellspring in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 3
    Last Post: 02-17-2010, 10:10 AM
  4. [INFJ] How do you get an INFJ to trust you?
    By EricHanson in forum The NF Idyllic (ENFP, INFP, ENFJ, INFJ)
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 10-29-2009, 07:43 AM
  5. [ISFP] How to seduce as an ISFP?
    By Dali in forum The SP Arthouse (ESFP, ISFP, ESTP, ISTP)
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 07-25-2009, 03:39 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
Single Sign On provided by vBSSO