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[ENFJ] ENFJ's: Not Manipulative.

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
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Aug 19, 2008
Messages
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We all have our ways of being "nasty" or "manipulative", whether we realize it or not. Admittedly, I don't have a lot of experience with INFJs, but I was working on a film with one a few months ago and when she didn't approve of my methods, she would say such sharp and criticizing words to everyone around her, instead of just to me. She would just mutter nasty sentences indirectly that were meant for me, but directed at others. When she saw it had no effect on me, she slowly turned silent.
What makes you so sure she's an INFJ? Because that's one tactic that is guaranteed to make me angry, so I certainly wouldn't do it to someone else. I don't like when people take pot-shots at me indirectly. Just take your issue up with the person, like an adult. If that is INFJ behavior I'm going to need to see some INFJs in my office.
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
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ENTP
I wasn't being a scolding harridan... I was quite polite. :)

Well. We've exchanged views. So, let's move on. There is likely a crudeness spectrum and I may be on the opposite pole from you. I recognize this essential reality. The question is, who should accommodate whom? I am not imposing my perspective on you, but to appease you I would have to adopt your perspective. :)
 
Joined
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(Also, if you were truly offended by my wry commentary, you could have communicated with me in a less public manner, if that was your goal. Not that it matters to me. Just pointing out your inconsistencies.)

I wanted to bring up the issue publicly, because there may be others who agree with me.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
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Lauren, She was one of the ones who turned me on to MBTI and she told me she was INFJ. I had no reason not to believe her. She seemed NTish, which many of your INFJs seem like to me.

Yes, I don't like that behavior either. But basically she knew she wouldn't get anywhere with me so she whined about me openly to my crew (guilt tripping). Then the door slam. Well, good riddance.

And I know that you would never behave that way, as I am sure that most INFJs wouldn't. I think she just had a maturity problem, which transcends type.
 

onemoretime

Dreaming the life
Joined
Jun 29, 2009
Messages
4,455
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3h50
Ooh, I just nailed down ENTP manipulation (for want of a better word) - it's letting someone hang themselves.

Yep. A word to the wise - if we start rapid-firing questions, you've already lost. This is how we, in my opinion, try to make you look like an idiot, not outright correcting you (which most people interpret to be as such).
 
Joined
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Why should your values be so primary that they require me to modulate myself to fit you?

My values don't require you to do that. If it's important for your freedom of expression, to sometimes do it in a manner that some might find to be a bit crude, that's your choice. I just have to decide if putting you on ignore is worth it, because I would then miss out on the comments you make that are frequently quite entertaining.
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
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Messages
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Yep. A word to the wise - if we start rapid-firing questions, you've already lost. This is how we, in my opinion, try to make you look like an idiot, not outright correcting you (which most people interpret to be as such).

I don't try to make people look stupid, per se. I try to poke holes in their flimsy justifications. Justifications that conceal an emotional predilection that is inherently subjective.

I thought it was funny. But Synarch has enough ego so I wasn't about to let him know that I laughed at it.

:bananallama:
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
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My values don't require you to do that. If it's important for your freedom of expression, to sometimes do it in a manner that some might find to be a bit crude, that's your choice. I just have to decide if putting you on ignore is worth it, because I would then miss out on the comments you make that are frequently quite entertaining.

Right. In other words, it's on you. Not me. I have to let my mind flow freely. Sometimes it's meaningless blather. You take the good with the bad. Or, rather, you take what you like with what you don't like, or you just don't take it.

Do you want my revelation or do you want Leave it to Beaver?
 

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
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I just have to decide if putting you on ignore is worth it, because I would then miss out on the comments you make that are frequently quite entertaining.

You wouldn't be the first, and certainly not the last. If Synarch didn't end up on at least one person's (mental or actual) ignore list per week, I would deem him a failure.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
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Do you want my revelation or do you want Leave it to Beaver?

You had every right to say what you said, and she had every right to ask you to stfu. So let's move on.
 
Joined
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Messages
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Right. In other words, it's on you. Not me. I have to let my mind flow freely. Sometimes it's meaningless blather. You take the good with the bad. Or, rather, you take what you like with what you don't like, or you just don't take it.

Do you want my revelation or do you want Leave it to Beaver?

Ah, freedom of expression. I understand that...I'm an artist.
 

Lauren Ashley

Revelation
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Aug 19, 2008
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You had every right to say what you said, and she had every right to ask you to stfu. So let's move on.

High five, jen.

It's so sad, you don't exist in my real life. So sad...
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
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High five, jen.

It's so sad, you don't exist in my real life. So sad...

awwww, you've genuinely moved me... :hug:

But I am 100% real, so we can totally make this happen. And we have to comb our collective male databases anyway, so a reason to meet? hahahaha...
 

Synarch

Once Was
Joined
Oct 14, 2008
Messages
8,445
MBTI Type
ENTP
You wouldn't be the first, and certainly not the last. If Synarch doesn't end up on at least one person's (mental or actual) ignore list per week, I would deem him a failure.

It is not the words that come out. There is a subtext and context beyond the coarseness that appears to you. We want to wash the outside of the cup without washing the inside. We want cleanliness in the world because we fear it can create filth in our selves.
 
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