I like this.The CEO of a start up I worked for was ENFJ (I tested him). He was the consummate salesman.
He spoke in a very facile way about emotions and often used the personal story of his suffering and his journey to connect with the target audience (women). It became clear to me immediately (because I am skeptical of well-worn sob stories) that while what he was saying may have been factually true, he was using it to influence, to encourage identification. To connect, but to connect for a very strategic purpose, which was to influence. Because I saw the goal as wringing money from vulnerable women looking for answers, I deemed his behavior as manipulative.
This, to me, is the essence of Fe. This ability to connect. Fe in the hands of a good person can be used to lead, in the hands of a weak person, to manipulate. But, it is powerful, especially since so many people want and desire identification and connection. But with this power comes responsibility.
With regard to the ENFJ's on this thread, why do you take issue with people who have found ENFJ's to be manipulative? Why does this notion offend? I am curious as to the vehemence of the reaction and why it elicits such a strong response.