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  1. #11
    IRL is not real Cimarron's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    And maybe it's rather patronizing to say this, but I've also learned that people are..well just people. They have their strengths as I have mine, and most of them just aren't as aware of what the consequences of their actions are for other people. Doesn't mean they're malicious or mean you any harm. It just means that they don't get you and...it's not their main interest in life to actually get you, so it's something they don't bother with.
    Isn't that depressing or disappointing for NFs? Which is maybe what you meant when you mentioned "patronizing."

  2. #12
    Senior Member Moiety's Avatar
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    Getting to be an Intuitive and a Feeler at the same time, what else?

    I mean, what do I have in common with an ENFJ anyway? I share more with an ENTP if you ask me. So I'd say it's not the traits I share with other NFs that I value the most, so much as the ones I share with other Ne users and Fi users.

  3. #13
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    It's because being an NF is awesome!
    It creates wonderful relationships.

  4. #14
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cimarron View Post
    Isn't that depressing or disappointing for NFs? Which is maybe what you meant when you mentioned "patronizing."
    It is depressing. In fact, in my case, it hurt me to my very core when I was younger because it is such an integral part of who I am that I didn't even consider the notion that maybe this isn't the way it works for everyone. And if you therefore wrongly assume that others have the same senses as you and same skills to certain degree...it would mean that although they understood perfectly what you were trying to say, they just don't give a damn and truly didn't consider your pov valid and even pretend to misunderstand you and twist your words. Nothing hurts more, imo, or makes you doubt yourself more.

    I never understood why it was that others had no problems hurting and judging others, and I never understood why they considered my well meant behavior as hurtfull and selfish. And even worse, when a miscommunication occurred, they weren't interested in finding out what had happened. They had their own ideas and moved on, judging me wrongly, I felt. Caused me a lot of grief, as I didn't wanna become insensitive to people or grow a 'thick skin' as was so often suggested to me (that just feels like I'm dead), and at the same time I wasn't able to understand why they acted like that.

    Of course, this was all seen through my eyes, and I wasn't able to gain the distance I needed to see what was going on. Have to admit that especially MBTI has been rather helpful on this
    ★ڿڰۣ✿ℒoѵℯ✿ڿڰۣ★





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  5. #15
    12 and a half weeks BerberElla's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    It is depressing. In fact, in my case, it hurt me to my very core when I was younger because it is such an integral part of who I am that I didn't even consider the notion that maybe this isn't the way it works for everyone. And if you therefore wrongly assume that others have the same senses as you and same skills to certain degree...it would mean that although they understood perfectly what you were trying to say, they just don't give a damn and truly didn't consider your pov valid and even pretend to misunderstand you and twist your words. Nothing hurts more, imo, or makes you doubt yourself more.

    I never understood why it was that others had no problems hurting and judging others, and I never understood why they considered my well meant behavior as hurtfull and selfish. And even worse, when a miscommunication occurred, they weren't interested in finding out what had happened. They had their own ideas and moved on, judging me wrongly, I felt. Caused me a lot of grief, as I didn't wanna become insensitive to people or grow a 'thick skin' as was so often suggested to me (that just feels like I'm dead), and at the same time I wasn't able to understand why they acted like that.

    Of course, this was all seen through my eyes, and I wasn't able to gain the distance I needed to see what was going on. Have to admit that especially MBTI has been rather helpful on this
    Yes, this is definately yet more proof of why I picked you as being the member I most identified with. I felt the same way, I wish I had known then what I know now, it would have saved me so much heartache along the way.
    Echo - "So are you trying to say she is Evil"

    DeWitt - "Something far worse, she's an Idealist"

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  6. #16
    Senior Member whimsical's Avatar
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    I have a very good connection with people and the way they are, I am a very kind and well mannered person, I am very imaginative and of course I feel emotions on an extremely deep level
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  7. #17
    Protocol Droid Athenian200's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Antisocial one View Post
    What do you like about being an NF ?
    Freedom from the tyranny of the ubiquitous compulsion to decide everything based on impersonal logic, and from a world without room for personal meaning.

    I also like the ability to anticipate certain aspects of human nature, gain a deeper sense of it, and express these things.

  8. #18
    Senior Member Scott N Denver's Avatar
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    "Because I am good enough, I am smart enough, and dog gone it people like me!"

    SNL character Stuart Smalley aside, I think we see more [or at least have the potential to] of the positive side of life, we can relate to people even ones who aren't really like us, we [can] inspire others, we see the positive potential in others and help them to develop/manifest it. And we are all about super deep meaningful conversations, or at least we really like them when they happen.

    I think we have questions and ponderings about life, the world, how things could be, but unlike our NT brethren we apply that to people. NT pondering [actual example if I recall correctly] "what if we put a laser on the moon..." NF pondering: "why do so many people seem not very happy? what can I do to help make people happier?"

  9. #19
    Senior Member Scott N Denver's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    It is depressing. In fact, in my case, it hurt me to my very core when I was younger because it is such an integral part of who I am that I didn't even consider the notion that maybe this isn't the way it works for everyone. And if you therefore wrongly assume that others have the same senses as you and same skills to certain degree...it would mean that although they understood perfectly what you were trying to say, they just don't give a damn and truly didn't consider your pov valid and even pretend to misunderstand you and twist your words. Nothing hurts more, imo, or makes you doubt yourself more.

    I never understood why it was that others had no problems hurting and judging others, and I never understood why they considered my well meant behavior as hurtfull and selfish. And even worse, when a miscommunication occurred, they weren't interested in finding out what had happened. They had their own ideas and moved on, judging me wrongly, I felt. Caused me a lot of grief, as I didn't wanna become insensitive to people or grow a 'thick skin' as was so often suggested to me (that just feels like I'm dead), and at the same time I wasn't able to understand why they acted like that.

    Of course, this was all seen through my eyes, and I wasn't able to gain the distance I needed to see what was going on. Have to admit that especially MBTI has been rather helpful on this
    I can relate with a lot of this as well. As an NF when people have problems I want each person to say their side, listen to others, understand the miscommunication, and know better how to prevent it in the future. Others I've met, ST's especially come to mind, seem very rigid in their interpretation of things "I'm right, your wrong/at fault, that's it!" and have little or no interest or willingness in understanding another's angle or even listening to another explain there side of things.

  10. #20
    Senior Member Scott N Denver's Avatar
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    Because we make friends easily!

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