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  1. #21
    Glycerine
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ne-Monster View Post

    IDK123's comments are really interesting though as I thought Fe sort of watched from the outside.

    Supposedly, if you feel "sad", I will feel "sad" because I am actually absorbing all your emotional energy (Fe). This is why many profiles say that Fe types tend to lose themselves in others if they don't consider themselves.

    If you feel "sad", I feel "sad" with you because that is how I would personally feel in your situation (Fi). This is why Fi types tend to be much better at comforting because of the personal approach to life. There is the difference between Fe and Fi theoretically. That is why i thought the examples in the OP sounded more Fe than Fi.

    Fi to me, always seem to know what the individual actually feels, thinks, and values. In the end, the Fi user will be genuine to themselves and will be less likely affected by others' moods and know what he or she actually thinks/feels of the situation.

    Fe types, IMO tend to actually absorb the emotional energy in the room to the point where they sometimes confuse the emotions, values, and thoughts of others as their own (if they don't watch out). Both functions can be highly empathetic.

  2. #22
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by IDK123 View Post
    Supposedly, if you feel "sad", I will feel "sad" because I am actually absorbing all your emotional energy (Fe). This is why many profiles say that Fe types tend to lose themselves in others if they don't consider themselves.

    If you feel "sad", I feel "sad" with you because that is how I would personally feel in your situation (Fi). This is why Fi types tend to be much better at comforting because of the personal approach to life. There is the difference between Fe and Fi theoretically. That is why i thought the examples in the OP sounded more Fe than Fi.

    Fi to me, always seem to know what the individual actually feels, thinks, and values. In the end, the Fi user will be genuine to themselves and will be less likely affected by others' moods and know what he or she actually thinks/feels of the situation.

    Fe types, IMO tend to actually absorb the emotional energy in the room to the point where they sometimes confuse the emotions, values, and of others as their own (if they don't watch out). Both functions can be highly empathetic.
    wow, so the Fe does sound like it acts like a mirror or sponge even more than Fi.

    Maybe I'll spend some time pouring over old threads as I thought this one was pretty clear, but now I am really confused...

  3. #23
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    Guess we both have our methods to do the same. The big challenge for both types is to not just mirror back the emotion or drown in the emotion, but actually through understanding transform the experience into something beneficial for the one you're empathizing with, an emotion that's useful to them as such, like comfort, warmth, peacefullness, happiness. Hard to do when the emotion you get thrown at you is intense though

    One thing about the difference: It would seem that Fi is better at empathizing at a distance coz we can imagine what it would be like as Fe requires outward clues? Yet Fe seems to me more likely to pick up on signals that someone is hurting as they are focussed on outside world, and we can be stuck in our own head and miss that if busy elsewhere.
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  4. #24
    Glycerine
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    Quote Originally Posted by Amargith View Post
    Guess we both have our methods to do the same. The big challenge for both types is to not just mirror back the emotion or drown in the emotion, but actually through understanding transform the experience into something beneficial for the one you're empathizing with, an emotion that's useful to them as such, like comfort, warmth, peacefullness, happiness. Hard to do when the emotion you get thrown at you is intense though

    One thing about the difference: It would seem that Fi is better at empathizing at a distance coz we can imagine what it would be like as Fe requires outward clues? Yet Fe seems to me more likely to pick up on signals that someone is hurting as they are focussed on outside world, and we can be stuck in our own head and miss that if busy elsewhere.
    I am not sure but sounds reasonable. I pick up on outward cues but it's mostly the vibe that the other person is giving off and I verify it by observing the behavior and vice versa. I am starting to think that anyone who has strong NF tendencies or anyone who is really balanced can be very empathetic. My NFP friends have helped me to walk in other people's shoes and vice versa.

  5. #25
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Okay, so it sounds a bit mixed-both Fe and Fi can mirror/sponge to some extent.

    Did you guys notice that as you grew older it became easier to decide if you actually wanted to mirror/sponge another's emotions as the feeling function finished being developed?

    Did you also develop the ability to decide when you wanted to feel and the ability to turn that totally off when you do not want to feel?

  6. #26
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    I did both...I soaked up all their emotions, and when I couldn't take it anymore, I mirrorred it all back at them in an attempt to protect myself. If I wasn't 'oversaturated', I was able to adjust the emotions instead of just mirrorring them back. It also depends on the intensity. I mirror mostly but, if the emotion is intense, I'm forced to soak it up. Certain emotions I tend to reflect back immediately, such as anger and frustration, and it takes me a lot of effort to stop that reflex. Whereas pain, sadness and grief I tend to soak up and am more easily capable of transforming in compassion, warmth and love, up to a certain point, where I'm forced to just mirror it back.


    And I chose not to develop the ability to turn it all off. I could do it to certain extent, but it isolated me so from the world it made me depressed and lonely.
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  7. #27
    Dreaming the life onemoretime's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ne-Monster View Post
    Okay, so it sounds a bit mixed-both Fe and Fi can mirror/sponge to some extent.
    Sounds to me like there may be a slight distinction - Fe recognizes the emotion/behavior, interprets that the right thing to do at that time is to manifest X emotion, and consequently shows that emotion, to the point it seems like a sponge. However, the emotion that the Fe user and the other person may manifest itself completely differently.

    So say, someone just broke up with a long-term significant other. That person comes over to the Fe user brokenhearted and distraught. Fe user sees this, and the brain shoots out a signal saying "hey, your friend is really down. You need to show this person that you care and are by their side (social obligation). To help you do this, I'm going to make you feel like crap (empathy)."

    Meanwhile, Fi recognizes the signs of the emotional state within a past experience that the person has undergone. Confronted with the experience, that person begins to reenact the emotional state within their cognition, and it is from this that the "mirror effect" occurs.

    The same example as before: Fi user sees this, and remembers the similar break-up of nine months ago. Replaying the events in their head, they begin to undergo the same emotional gamut that occurred in their particular situation, and thus come to a similar emotional state as the other person (sympathy). There's no question of social obligation because there's no concept of being unable to attach these situations to personal memories.

  8. #28
    The High Priestess Amargith's Avatar
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    You forgot the part where we can so identify with how they feel that we wouldn't want to wish that on anyone and are therefore compelled to somehow 'soothe' those emotions
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  9. #29
    Senior Member sculpting's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by onemoretime View Post
    Meanwhile, Fi recognizes the signs of the emotional state within a past experience that the person has undergone. Confronted with the experience, that person begins to reenact the emotional state within their cognition, and it is from this that the "mirror effect" occurs.

    The same example as before: Fi user sees this, and remembers the similar break-up of nine months ago. Replaying the events in their head, they begin to undergo the same emotional gamut that occurred in their particular situation, and thus come to a similar emotional state as the other person (sympathy). There's no question of social obligation because there's no concept of being unable to attach these situations to personal memories.
    For me there is no middle ground of remembering. It is all subconscious perhaps. I see thier pain, I feel thier pain. I don't think about any past experiences on mine or thier parts.

    However it could be based upon previous "mental maps" my own brain has put together that work as mental shortcuts for certain types of pain. I felt that pain, see someone else in what I perceive to be a similiar type of pain, then "feel" thier pain.

    And yes, want to remove them from pain at that point, so that I no longer suffer.

    Same thing with hapiness or affection. Near instant mirror-IF I allow myself to be open to the incoming emotion. However that is an all or none game.

  10. #30
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    I think Fi and Fe can both assess people's moods by doing very different things (as it's demonstrated here). I tend to be able to realize an INDIVIDUAL'S mood/emotions/thoughts by interacting with them or observing them. I can't soak up the emotional atmosphere of the room usually unless I focus on doing it.

    Fi to me, always seem to know what the individual actually feels, thinks, and values. In the end, the Fi user will be genuine to themselves and will be less likely affected by others' moods and know what he or she actually thinks/feels of the situation.

    Fe types, IMO tend to actually absorb the emotional energy in the room to the point where they sometimes confuse the emotions, values, and thoughts of others as their own (if they don't watch out). Both functions can be highly empathetic.
    This is true. Both F functions are empathetic and assess moods. But they're both very different at the same time.

    Don't over analyze it... you'll confuse yourself lol.
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