Fi can definitely be selfishness related.
But in this case, I think you're the selfish one. You want them to take time and visit you when you're bedridden, without being asked, and when doing so probably wouldn't even be enjoyable? Don't you think that's a bit childish? It sounds to me as if you're only considering your own feelings here.
Personally, I'd be so ashamed of what a mess I was that I wouldn't WANT anyone to see me like that. So I might actually consider her behavior to be kinder than insisting on showing up and making me feel bad because I'm in such an ill humor and can't entertain them adequately.
The point is, not everyone would want what you're describing. Also, some people feel extremely uncomfortable/awkward around injured or sick people. Did you not consider that possibility?