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[NF] Why does everyone think I'm sick?

hommefatal

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Apr 11, 2009
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938
Whenever I talk to others on the internet who are not anonymous they think of me as a creepy stalker and block me. It seems like NF is not very appreciated. When I meet someone I tend to visit the homepage they specified. Then I tell them what I found out about them. Then they mostly think I want to rape or murder them instead of appreciating my interest. I just prefer to know a lot about someone so I try to find things about them, what I find out is often more honest.

Example:
1. typologycentral profile, myspace profile specified
2. myspace profile, real name or school
3. I search for the person on other networks.

My intuition does this to me. Usually I find out something about nearly anyone within a short time.

Has anyone experienced similar?

I have to add most people who feel stalked are minors.
 

Totenkindly

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I think some of it is a lack of social discretion.

If you want to look up online information on someone, fine.
I do that sometimes, out of curiosity.
But usually only stalkers actually go TELL the person everything they found out.
Such information might give you some ideas on what to talk to them about, but usually you should "reacquire the information legitimately" -- i.e., by talking to them directly and having THEM tell you -- before you start bringing up details in conversation.

So... what sort of reaction do you expect?
It sounds almost like you're trying to instigate a reaction from them...?
 

Fluffywolf

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It's a good thing minors are careful like that, just in case.

Such is the internet. :yes:
 

Atomic Fiend

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I have to add most people who feel stalked are minors.

Kids are neurotic, fearful, stupid creatures. Like miniature adults. In fact I wouldn't be surprised if these behaviors were taught by adults to protect the children, which is not at all bad, however like I just said earlier kids are neurotic, fearful, stupid creatures, who are prone to overreactions.
 

JocktheMotie

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Hmm, I don't really get that vibe from you. Although if it's a consistent problem... maybe throw a little cold water on that furious inferno of Ne-fueled curiosity? I've often found Ne doms can be victims of intellectual hedonism.
 

Queen Kat

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Same here! It's just that I never tell people what I found out about them. I just use it against them. :devil:
 

Athenian200

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Whenever I talk to others on the internet who are not anonymous they think of me as a creepy stalker and block me. It seems like NF is not very appreciated. When I meet someone I tend to visit the homepage they specified. Then I tell them what I found out about them. Then they mostly think I want to rape or murder them instead of appreciating my interest. I just prefer to know a lot about someone so I try to find things about them, what I find out is often more honest.

Example:
1. typologycentral profile, myspace profile specified
2. myspace profile, real name or school
3. I search for the person on other networks.

My intuition does this to me. Usually I find out something about nearly anyone within a short time.

Has anyone experienced similar?

I have to add most people who feel stalked are minors.

I know what you mean. I'm very good at finding information on people, and I've gotten to the point that I make sure not to tell people what I've found on them. Maybe even going as far as trying to lead them into sharing it with me via a seemingly unrelated topic so I can discuss it if it's important enough to me.

You probably shouldn't be talking to minors anyway. It's kind of suspicious and creepy to talk to minors at all, honestly. I try my best to avoid them.
 

Atomic Fiend

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I know what you mean. I'm very good at finding information on people, and I've gotten to the point that I make sure not to tell people what I've found on them. Maybe even going as far as trying to lead them into sharing it with me via a seemingly unrelated topic so I can discuss it if it's important enough to me.

You probably shouldn't be talking to minors anyway. It's kind of suspicious and creepy to talk to minors at all, honestly. I try my best to avoid them.
She's a minor herself last I checked.
 

ajblaise

Minister of Propagandhi
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What is just extra friendly IRL suddenly becomes extremely creepy when you decide to do it online.

Tone it down, I'd say. At least until you get to know people well enough for them not to be freaked out by it.
 
P

Phantonym

Guest
Your curiosity and enthusiasm might be seen as too intense. Maybe you should blame your E?

Jennifer gave some good advice.
 

hommefatal

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Joined
Apr 11, 2009
Messages
938
I think some of it is a lack of social discretion.

If you want to look up online information on someone, fine.
I do that sometimes, out of curiosity.
But usually only stalkers actually go TELL the person everything they found out.
Such information might give you some ideas on what to talk to them about, but usually you should "reacquire the information legitimately" -- i.e., by talking to them directly and having THEM tell you -- before you start bringing up details in conversation.

So... what sort of reaction do you expect?
It sounds almost like you're trying to instigate a reaction from them...?
Hmm, I don't really get that vibe from you. Although if it's a consistent problem... maybe throw a little cold water on that furious inferno of Ne-fueled curiosity? I've often found Ne doms can be victims of intellectual hedonism.
Yeah. It makes me no sense to me if I don't tell them. That's unfair to me.
It's not really a consistent problem. Maybe it's histrionic behaviour. I feel the need to listen to every opinion and when someone ignores me I feel really expelled. It just happens when people are overly secretive and I am too interested to not search Google. A huge problem is the people who are afraid of me are often similar to me (actually, I'm very secretive too) but they don't know how to deal with it. I tend to write them what I think then but if they don't answer I feel like killing myself which is dependent behaviour. I read too much into personality disorders.
 

hommefatal

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Apr 11, 2009
Messages
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I know what you mean. I'm very good at finding information on people, and I've gotten to the point that I make sure not to tell people what I've found on them. Maybe even going as far as trying to lead them into sharing it with me via a seemingly unrelated topic so I can discuss it if it's important enough to me.

You probably shouldn't be talking to minors anyway. It's kind of suspicious and creepy to talk to minors at all, honestly. I try my best to avoid them.
hahaha
What is just extra friendly IRL suddenly becomes extremely creepy when you decide to do it online.

Tone it down, I'd say. At least until you get to know people well enough for them not to be freaked out by it.
But I tend to avoid meeting people without knowing enough about them.
 

laughingebony

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Jun 8, 2009
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I think some of it is a lack of social discretion.

If you want to look up online information on someone, fine.
I do that sometimes, out of curiosity.
But usually only stalkers actually go TELL the person everything they found out.
Such information might give you some ideas on what to talk to them about, but usually you should "reacquire the information legitimately" -- i.e., by talking to them directly and having THEM tell you -- before you start bringing up details in conversation.

I think there is a lot of truth in this. I would probably be wierded out momentarily if somebody I didn't know started telling me about my hobbies, music interests, etc. What I don't understand, however, is why these people would place that information on their profiles if they didn't want people to see it.
 

hommefatal

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I think there is a lot of truth in this. I would probably be wierded out momentarily if somebody I didn't know started telling me about my hobbies, music interests, etc. What I don't understand, however, is why these people would place that information on their profiles if they didn't want people to see it.
They don't expect people would be smart enough to add up all those information from different websites.
 

Lady_X

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dude...maybe you should just let people tell you what they want about themselves in their own time.
 

hommefatal

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dude...maybe you should just let people tell you what they want about themselves in their own time.
that can be very frustating. Sometimes people take hours to answer one simple question. They tell how the weather is in the meantime. Not that I dislike it but I feel made fun of after some time.
 

Lady_X

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i don't understand that. could you expand?
 

Totenkindly

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I think there is a lot of truth in this. I would probably be wierded out momentarily if somebody I didn't know started telling me about my hobbies, music interests, etc. What I don't understand, however, is why these people would place that information on their profiles if they didn't want people to see it.

That's the other side of the coin, definitely.

I think people just assume other people will respect their boundaries the same way they would respect theirs, then get surprised when someone has a different approach.

Honestly, yes, if you put it out there yourself, you should assume everyone can see it, find out about it, and you'd better be accepting about them knowing and using the information.

But I tend to avoid meeting people without knowing enough about them.

Well, like I said... do your research, but be prudent about what you actually bring up in conversation. Let them tell you much of the stuff again themselves, it will alleviate some of the hostility.

Histrionics and other psychological disorders are pretty severe -- basically you'll get diagnosed if you can't function in society, but otherwise you're only exhibiting some of the features without really "having" the condition. It sounds like you are able to observe and comment on your own behavior (that's a big plus); hence, you can make changes that seem prudent to you.
 
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