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  1. #41
    Senior Member Vortex's Avatar
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    Niffer;

    I think that's completely different for everyone. For some, it could be a gradual process, for others a sudden enlightenment. For me, it's hacking away at the surface and trying not to feel too uneasy about the areas exposed. I try to make a constant effort to be 'true' about who I am and I let myself get hurt. I would never do something like that before; instead I'd partition off any feelings that needed to be dealt with or let the surface persona deal with them or find other ways to get around the whole emotional aspect. I'm not saying that it's typical, only that I've observed, heard and read about this in other ENFPs, but it might be something quite a few types experience.

    Okay, how can I tell that I shed my skin - well, first of all I feel a lot more exposed. Everything is a lot more raw and a lot more meaningful. It's like the difference between wearing and not wearing glasses. Only, in this case, things get a lot sharper, nastier and more true to life when you wear them - which would be shedding the skin. The muffled, grainy world I get from pouring energy into my 'skin' lifts and everything becomes more clear. But I'm not sure if I'm phrasing this correctly, or if I'm projecting my own battles onto my type. I'd love to hear if anyone can identify with some aspect of this. It's not the same as having a public and a private face - this is something constant, a 'buffer-barrier' you'll even set up for yourself. It took me some years to even become fully aware of it and it still puzzles me.

  2. #42
    ~*taaa raaa raaa boom*~ targobelle's Avatar
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    YES Vortex I agree with every word. But maybe it's more common in those of us who have lived a lil longer than our dear young Niffer.

    It's painfully raw and rips at your heart and you want to run and hide and and and...... you want to stay b/c it's hurts so bad yet feels so good to be able to trust someone on that level and vulnerable with someone on that level and just contect. It's not something I can do often it takes a lot out of me.

    As for the buffer yes I have friends who have noticed it and I am always shocked by the reality of it being there b/c I thought I took it down and it was in the wash.... yet no it's always there. Sometimes it's like a think black concrete wall and other times it's like mesh material certain molecules can pass through but others cannot.....

    I so much want to take it down but am so afraid too... in life I feel so lost and almost invisable... so often I feel like I am on the outside looking in....
    ~t ...in need of hugs please...
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  3. #43
    Senior Member Vortex's Avatar
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    Targo;

    You've explained it excellently, it's really amazing that our views on that are so alike.

    It's a shame there are so few ENFPs here. I'd like to know if this is a trend or just us two

  4. #44
    ~*taaa raaa raaa boom*~ targobelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vortex View Post
    Targo;

    You've explained it excellently, it's really amazing that our views on that are so alike.

    It's a shame there are so few ENFPs here. I'd like to know if this is a trend or just us two

    thanks

    Yes I wonder that too.... which is why I started this thread initially was to just clear things up for others and to actually learn about whether or not others were like me. Seems like there is a very hiddlen world with enfp's

    I must admitted sharing this feels very vulnerable and I feel a huge need to pull away and regroup and gather my composure, I also feel a big need to go back and erase it all. But if I leave it up then I grow and like you said "skin is shed" which is really what I need right now.
    ~t ...in need of hugs please...
    Jung Test Results
    Extroverted (E) 63.16% Intuitive (N) 60.53% Feeling (F) 84.38% Perceiving (P) 87.1% ~Your type is: ENFP

  5. #45
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by targo View Post
    Seems like there is a very hiddlen world with enfp's
    I think this is part of the appeal of ENFPs.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  6. #46
    ~*taaa raaa raaa boom*~ targobelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Metamorphosis View Post
    I think this is part of the appeal of ENFPs.


    hhhmmmm

    then why do people always seem to wander away just before they get to the middle of the book..... we are slow and patient and test you over and over again to see if we can really trust you with us. There are many fasaudes that are put up but they are all different variations of us.

    I know it's really hard to get to know me and a lot of work to really stand the test of time but I promise you if your pursevere past the tipping point the reward shall be sweet.... I haven't met many who are willing to put in the time to get to that point, so alas I am always left feeling lost.... *sigh*
    ~t ...in need of hugs please...
    Jung Test Results
    Extroverted (E) 63.16% Intuitive (N) 60.53% Feeling (F) 84.38% Perceiving (P) 87.1% ~Your type is: ENFP

  7. #47
    Per Ardua Metamorphosis's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by targo View Post
    hhhmmmm

    then why do people always seem to wander away just before they get to the middle of the book..... we are slow and patient and test you over and over again to see if we can really trust you with us. There are many fasaudes that are put up but they are all different variations of us.

    I know it's really hard to get to know me and a lot of work to really stand the test of time but I promise you if your pursevere past the tipping point the reward shall be sweet.... I haven't met many who are willing to put in the time to get to that point, so alas I am always left feeling lost.... *sigh*
    I think part of the problem is that (as you are pointing out), ENFPs are afraid to let go. Couple that with the fact that they tend to be friendly with pretty much everyone and it is difficult for people to know if they genuinely like you or are just nice to everyone. (Although, I think this is also because they are so afraid of offending anyone). I've discussed some ENFP traits with people of other types and they are always surprised when they will be talking to an ENFP friend of theirs and the ENFP will totally leave them hanging to talk to someone else they see, just because they are afraid of offending the other person by not talking to them. (This doesn't matter to me but some F types might interpret it differently).

    I've also noticed that they tend to talk to people that they are just getting to know like they are testing the waters. It's like they think before every sentence. It's entertaining to me, but who knows what other types think.
    "You will always be fond of me. I represent to you all the sins you never had the courage to commit."

    Reason is, and ought only to be the slave of the passions, and can never pretend to any other office
    than to serve and obey them. - David Hume

  8. #48
    Senior Member Vortex's Avatar
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    haha, I felt totally offended by Meta's last post because it ws so blatantly true. Dammit!
    Last edited by Vortex; 09-26-2007 at 06:55 PM. Reason: I don't walk away from people I know. Only thise I don't know. Security, ya know.

  9. #49
    ~*taaa raaa raaa boom*~ targobelle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vortex View Post
    haha, I felt totally offended by Meta's last post because it ws so blatantly true. Dammit!

    yes DAMMIT! lol
    ~t ...in need of hugs please...
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    Extroverted (E) 63.16% Intuitive (N) 60.53% Feeling (F) 84.38% Perceiving (P) 87.1% ~Your type is: ENFP

  10. #50
    Senior Member niffer's Avatar
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    It was true but I didn't find it offensive. Also, about the testing people..I don't think I really test people. But I do think about every sentence I speak to someone I don't know very well. It's like I have a plan I've made of the attitude towards them I'm trying to project, to neutralize the unknown grounds between me and them that they should have as neutral (or so I'd like them to have), and I specialize every sentence I say and every action I take to carry out that plan.

    Quote Originally Posted by targo View Post
    hhhmmmm

    then why do people always seem to wander away just before they get to the middle of the book
    I had to think about this one for a while hehe. It is true that this is how it seems sometimes, but really we are the ones wandering away. Well not exactly wandering, and not exactly away, but most of us are pretty widespread in these terms, and you must admit that.

    ..... we are slow and patient and test you over and over again to see if we can really trust you with us. There are many fasaudes that are put up but they are all different variations of us.
    Lol I totally agree with this. It's like Shrek, if you've ever watched that. Ogres are like onions. They have layers.

    I know it's really hard to get to know me and a lot of work to really stand the test of time but I promise you if your pursevere past the tipping point the reward shall be sweet.... I haven't met many who are willing to put in the time to get to that point, so alas I am always left feeling lost.... *sigh*
    I don't understand where the tipping point is. This part is a little confusing to me.

    YEAAHHHHHHH targoooooooooooo~~~!!!
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