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  1. #1
    Member MattC333's Avatar
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    Default Learning the ENFP jedi mind tricks...

    Hey all, new to the site and relatively new to types.

    known about types for a while, but never seen much beyond a few basic pages, nothing so extensive where I can actually get feedback.

    Well rather than get questions or ask them like the ESTJ post that sparked this idea, I just wanted people to tell me about themselves and what makes them enjoy their ENFPness.

    You know, the works! Romance, relationships, our natural role as advisor/agony person, our creative streak. I've noted we're very people people
    and warm immensely in new social settings. What are we like in work environments generally? Please share.

    I've recently become self-employed and also started a (very) small business. I couldn't stay in routine jobs, I needed freedom to work at my own pace (which is surprisingly good atm, a true rarity for me). Is this a common trait for ENFPs?

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    Member MattC333's Avatar
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    Hi Amargith,

    Thanks for the links. Haven't finished reading them all, but responding while I have this thought in my head!

    Seems that you and I are very similar ENFPs.

    I do get the sensation of being either too E or not enough. When faced with someone is blatantly more E I know that my psychology training could totally mind melt them and make the new alpha, but I don't like too. I like naturally being the major E.

    When I'm on an atypical ramble though, one of two things happen and I'm wondering if you get the same thing:

    1) My brain goes on autopilot and it's suddenly like there's a 3rd person in the convo (if there was only 2 to start with), there's them, me and me reacting to me. That 3rd person is responding to all the new things I'll have suddenly realised and 'linked' together, like a new realisation about the world. And I don't want to lose those new thoughts so I carry on rambling.

    2) I ramble anyway but more cautiously, and start feeling highly egotistical and selfish for continually talking at the person, but they're not joining in so I keep going, hoping that they'll join in the conversation. This usually happens when I think people aren't being suckered in by my usual charm!

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    Member MattC333's Avatar
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    Ohhh another thing...lol

    Until someone presents me with a problem to solve, I tend to talk from the 'I' frame alot. I just keep expressing myself which sounds horribly egocentric.

    Once someone needs help, I stop that and get involved. Is this a normal reaction?

  5. #5
    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    Default

    i think i know what ya mean...i think i'm very aware of talking too much or about myself too much because i don't want to come off that way...but...i think it's about wanting that back and forth of...i do this...and this is what i've experienced and you're hoping the other person will then tell you their experience because i don't want to pry too much either but i like to share different experiences and don't want to go into either monologue mode or reporter mode...i like it to flow both ways....let's see... how many i's did i use in that sentence...see...it's ridiculous.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

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    Member MattC333's Avatar
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    Haha, exactly! I didn't mind at all, cos I was happy to get feedback from your experience! I love hearing people talking about themselves to me, and then relating to them! It's wonderful, but when it's me doing it, there are times when I'm overly conscious I'm expressing *my* opinions.
    The reality is I'm expressing myself and vocalising thoughts as they hit me, the last thing I wanna do is come across as overly self-interested which is totally not an ENFP trait, we love people!!!
    I do it with this ENFJ I'm seeing, I talk and talk then go 'sh*t, I'm doing it again!!' and want her to join in.
    She's told me that unless she's got something to say though, she loves seeing people ramble so she can find out more about them. If she wants to talk, she does let me know thankfully.

    Actually that ENFP overwhelming post was interesting, it's hard to remember that it's one of best traits!!!

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    mod love baby... Lady_X's Avatar
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    right it's how we relate and empathize actually which i have recently realized may seem like we're taking the attention off of someone and their problems when we discuss a similar situation we have dealt with...but...that's so not the point...i want people to get that...it's our way of saying...yeah...i know...i've been there too....because to us...that feels good. we like to know our feelings or reactions make sense or we're doing the right thing or whatever.

    so yeah...i want that to be seen accurately as well...it is about a connection...not about us...we really do love people...i love that about us.
    There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first.
    -Jim Morrison

  8. #8
    Member MattC333's Avatar
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    Aye!
    Well alot of people say of me that from the moment they met me they could be totally open and accepted. So many people that I meet tell me secrets and confide in me and I don't tell on them. But it's established early on that I'm the go-to guy because I don't judge.
    I've had such a mixed and varied life so far that it's easy just to understand where people are coming from and where things may have been difficult for them with them disturbing my values.

    Yeah, people are fun and exciting. I always get supercharged by being around people.
    We ENFPs rule, we are the Jedi Masters Without us there would be no excitement!!!

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