[MBTI General] How do NF's talk to S's in general?

[sabastious]

I have tested 88% Intuitive and naturally I have a serious communication problem with S's in general.

They always seem to give me a look of almost disgust that I care so much about seemingly light issues.

A perfect example would be talking about movies, something I really enjoy talking about. The movie would be WALL-E.

I really saw what the makers of WALL-E were trying to get at. WALL-E and EVE broke out of their "programming" when it seemed to be obsolete. The AUTO bot was just the opposite, he followed "orders" to a fault and nearly killed all the people he was created to protect on the Axiom.

I was explaining this to an S and her reply was: "WALL-E makes funny noises." It was a bit tongue and cheek but that's how the conversation ended. She was basically saying that she couldn't care less about the moral values of the story, and I would assume she is confused why I would care about them.

So, how does a strong NF like myself comminucate with S's? So far it's been an epic fail at every turn.

 

[Moiety]

First of all, you need to acknowledge there is variety within the Ss ranks, obviously.

Secondly, there is moral value to be found pretty much everywhere if you look hard enough (I hear ya NFP brotha). I can't say it's what led me to watch WALL-E...but also not what led me to drop it halfway through.


Thirdly, it's sometimes healthy to just accept some people are "dumb" or shallow or have different interests or whatever.


Fourthly, I could see myself using your friend's line if I was not really in the mood to talk about such stuff.

Fifthly, Ns make better company

 

[Athenian200]

Well, if people like those are Sensors... I talk to them as little as possible, because they bore and annoy me. They're like two-year olds.

I'd suggest just keeping the conversation on a surface level about things that you HAVE to talk to them about. Don't bother with anything superfluous, and just fake your way through.

I think that this is more a matter of intelligence than S/N, though. A clever S will likely be somewhat enjoyable to talk to, and will be steering the conversation in a direction that's good for both of you.

 

[sabastious]

It's not that sensors dont ever want to talk about anything "deep." They just go about it a completely different way than N's. How do we as strong intuituve types bridge that gap between N's and strong S's?

 

[sabastious]

I think that this is more a matter of intelligence than S/N, though

From my experience I have never met any type that is a stronger sensor that loves to read into things and dig deep into the meaning of things. But I could just have been around the same types of S's.

 

[Wiley45]

In my experience, I just don't really ever 'bridge that gap' with strong S's. I'm polite, but we don't hit it off well. However, I know some S's who are enjoyable to talk to, so to echo what's been said, it does really depend on the S person -- they vary, of course.

 

[sabastious]

In my experience, I just don't really ever 'bridge that gap' with strong S's. I'm polite, but we don't hit it off well. However, I know some S's who are enjoyable to talk to, so to echo what's been said, it does really depend on the S person -- they vary, of course.

What type am I refering too tho, SJ's? Or am I refering to NT's? And got the whole S thing off.

 

[Thessaly]

I act the same with SJs as I do with any other type. I just know to expect the occasional eye roll and look of disbelief and respond accordingly with even more of what provoked the reaction. Eventually their sense of humor kicks in and all is well until the next disagreement .

 

[Quinlan]

Find more open S's.

 

[Wiley45]

Whoops, I meant to say strong SJ's. I do well with most SP's.

 

[Jeffster]

duhhhhhh.....

 

[OrangeAppled]

I can have interesting conversations with sensors. There is a wall there, but it can be overcome if you find common ground. I know a lot of xSFJs and discussing food/cooking is always interesting. It's "here & now" for them, but I get to analyze flavors and that sort of thing. Same with people...I try and steer what feels "gossipy" to me into more analytical territory of people's behavior. They will usually go along because they still get to talk about so-&-so. I avoid hypothetical situations, metaphors, and "what ifs" because then I lose them, haha. I find myself using Te over Ne a lot with sensors, and then I seem very cold and boring I think.

I've met fellow intuitives that were hard to talk to as well.
Intuitives have trouble being linear, and I think we lose ourselves in conversation sometimes

There's always going to be people you don't clique with. Intuitives may have a harder time finding people they can get close to intellectually. Don't be too surprised if it's actually with a sensor though

 

[Rhapsody]

Maybe you've just got to find yourself some better Sensors to hang out with. Most Sensors I've known are very intelligent, discerning people, and they're just as interested in having meaningful conversations as NFs. It's a different flavor of meaningful I guess ... less fanciful N tangents and the like ... but not every S is as flippant as the girl described in your post.

I don't really have any advice except to just act like yourself, as Thessaly said. And also, be careful not to fall into confirmation bias. I remember when I first found out about MBTI, I thought everyone I had a mental connection with must be N ... and then a couple girls I would've sworn up and down were ENFPs turned out to be ESFJs. So yeah, keep in mind that it's totally possible you already get along with some Sensors and just don't know it (and that the people you're not clicking with might not be Sensors at all, but just plain stupid ).

 

[heart]

It would be easiest if the S/N divide were a handy indication of who thinks for themselves and who does not (i.e. is programed) , but it doesn't seem to be the case.

 

[Colors]

Answer to the title: Like people? Like people talk to other people?

 

[Poki]

From my experience I have never met any type that is a stronger sensor that loves to read into things and dig deep into the meaning of things. But I could just have been around the same types of S's.

I like to really dig deep, but its all in my head, im not to good with the verbalizing of it

 

[Atomic Fiend]

Answer to the title: Like people? Like people talk to other people?

I was about to say the exact same thing.

 

[Wiley45]

In my experience, I just don't really ever 'bridge that gap' with strong S's. I'm polite, but we don't hit it off well. However, I know some S's who are enjoyable to talk to, so to echo what's been said, it does really depend on the S person -- they vary, of course.

I phrased this badly and sounded really arrogant -- not how I meant to come across. I was not trying to say that I "tolerate" strong S (SJ) types. Rather, I meant that the conversations tend to be "polite" (from both my side the other person's) rather than reaching that point where we both "get" each other and really hit it off. I don't dislike strong SJ's ... just, in my experience, we don't have a super strong connection and go rushing back to talk to each other.

Hopefully that's a little more clear than my first attempt.

 

[Ruthie]

Answer to the title: Like people? Like people talk to other people?

Yup. Thanks for saying it.

 

[Unique]

You wanted to discuss the "deep" meanings of a children's movie

uhuh....

Seriously, I've seen wall-E, its a good story and yes meaningful for a cartoon movie but I can understand your S friends frustration if you were trying to go psychological on it

You want to have a deep discussion with an S? Learn time and place for it first and for gods sake pick a better topic!