In response to the OP, I'd say just try asking this INFP lots of questions ... lots and lots of questions. Try to make her feel understood, and whatever you do, don't make her feel judged. Conversely, sharing a lot about yourself, and sharing things that are obviously meaningful to you, could also inspire her to open up and share what's meaningful to her. And feeding her Ne is never a bad idea. INFPs love quirky, off-the-wall ideas.