Yes, this is, indeed the basis of trust. Thank you for your very open and honest reply to my question. I enjoy reading your wel articulated thoughts on this forum and appreciate the positive things you have said about Infj's in particular. It has been so nice to go from feeling like an oddball in the world to finding oneself not only not alone, but actually sometimes even appreciated at typology c.
Welcome and thanks for your contributions! As in all things, you are rarely ever alone.
"Create like a god, command like a king, work like a slave."
People may get X-ed out of my life depending on the severity of the offense. But revenge is not my thing; it would only hurt me in the process. I don't think I "hate" anyone but there are people I choose not to associate with because they bring more grief to my life than joy.
Exactly. I don't think I have ever taken revenge or ever hated someone but if you are a complete idiot I won't give you the time of the day. It's actually a rather logical decision.
When someone hurts me I obsess about it until I can understand what happened. I internalize negativity too easily and it is my Achilles heel. I get more distant from the person, but I don't think of it as a doorslam. I also never grow tired of people. I never have them figured out. I can deliberately work at understanding someone for fifteen years and still know that i can only come within an approximation of understanding the whole of the complexity and nuance. If I saw the world like a cartoon, then yes, i would probably be able to say I had a lot figured out, but there is much more to understand than a caricature of each person. People possess a vast complexity and depth of nuance.
+1. This is me in a nutshell. Even after being completely hurt and manipulated, I feel as though there is still some underlying truth I've yet to find. Therefore, I'm never really willing to completely shut someone out of my life or put them on some bad list.
Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one!'
When there is someone who has either done something to me or acted in a certain way towards me (unpleasant of course), I immediately put them on my "sh*t list" and from that moment on, I may go out of my way to make things difficult for them. Not in a way that it would be harmful, but I would not go out of my way for them. Are any other INFJs here that are the same way? Okay, at times, I may do something evil as revenge (as long as this does not go against my own values).
Just please be careful. Revenge checked only by morality is a slippery slope. I've seen INFJs' moral compasses get broken under times of extreme duress, and then do some pretty horrible things as a means to questionable ends.
This sort of thing is why I'm not sure that ENTP-INFJ matches are a good idea. I know that personally, trust has always been very important to me in relationships. I couldn't trust someone who would potentially do this.
Then the ENTP isn't or wasn't committed. We are loyal to those we love. It's as simple as that. Truly.
"..And the eight and final rule: If this is your first time at Fight Club, you have to fight."
'Men are meant to be with women. The rest is perversion and mental illness.'