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  1. #111
    Lungs & Lips Locked Unkindloving's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mystical_Spaghetti View Post
    Where would one go about finding an ENFJ?

    Is there some sort of symbol I can flash into the sky that assembles all ENFJs within a 50 mile radius?
    Yes, there's a custom bat-signal you can build. It reads "Guide Me... no, not you, God"
    If you build it... they will come.

    I saw you were already linked, but hopefully you spot us easily in the future
    Hang on traveling woman - Don't sacrifice your plan
    Cause it will come back to you - Before you lose it on the man


    .:: DWTWD ::.

    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]


    2011 TypeC Exercise Challenge - My Weekly Goals: Cardio 4x. Yoga/Pilates 1x. Pushups 70.

    There is this thing keeping everyone's lungs and lips locked - It is called fear and it's seeing a great renaissance

  2. #112
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    Okay, I'm on it. *stows away into the cover of the night* *begins to climb building*


    Thank you though; I hope so as well.
    4w3 sx/sp? INFP, INFp

  3. #113
    Plumage and Moult proteanmix's Avatar
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    Le sigh, I don't know about ENFJs and relationships anymore.

    Too much negative exposure from the opinions on this forum has unfortunately led to awkward self-consciousness about my romantic needs, wants, and desires.

    I am now under the impression that my ideas of intimacy are generally referred to as controlling, codependent, possessive, and clingy.

    I'm going to find me an ESFJ male and get happy.
    Relationships have normal ebbs and flows. They do not automatically get better and better when the participants learn more and more about each other. Instead, the participants have to work through the tensions of the relationship (the dialectic) while they learn and group themselves and a parties in a relationships. At times the relationships is very open and sharing. Other time, one or both parties to the relationship need their space, or have other concerns, and the relationship is less open. The theory posits that these cycles occur throughout the life of the relationship as the persons try to balance their needs for privacy and open relationship.
    Interpersonal Communication Theories and Concepts
    Social Penetration Theory 1
    Social Penetration Theory 2
    Social Penetration Theory 3

  4. #114
    That's my name biotch! JoSunshine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by proteanmix View Post
    Le sigh, I don't know about ENFJs and relationships anymore.

    Too much negative exposure from the opinions on this forum has unfortunately led to awkward self-consciousness about my romantic needs, wants, and desires.

    I am now under the impression that my ideas of intimacy are generally referred to as controlling, codependent, possessive, and clingy.

    I'm going to find me an ESFJ male and get happy.
    I had me an ESFJ male and it was VERY happy...until it turned into a train wreck Then I was VERY unhappy.

    I don't think it is a matter of type, I think is just finding the right person for YOU. For me personally having had LTR with an ESFJ, ESxP, INTP and INTJ and STR (2-4 months) with an INFJ, ISTJ, and others I can't type, I would definitely say it boils down to needing someone who is well-balanced, considerate and open. I think is is dangerous business when you start excluding people based on type. I think it is a way to try to preserve ourselves from being hurt, but there are awful people in every type as well as incredible people. I would say take a look at some of the threads about Rate Your Parents Relationship - you will see there that many people describe their parents' relationships as being great and there are all kinds of types that work well together.
    "Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. " - Dr. Seuss
    I can't spell...get over it

    Slightly ENFJ, totally JoSunshine
    Extroverted (E) 52.5%........Introverted (I) 47.5%
    Intuitive (N) 65.63%..........Sensing (S) 34.38%
    Feeling (F) 55.56%............Thinking (T) 44.44%
    Judging (J) 51.43%............Perceiving (P) 48.57%

  5. #115
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    ENFJ's are tricky to find since they are so busy, but mostly to be found in high profile areas. As for their ideas of relationships, they like to show they care by offering suggestions you should do and doing things for you without consulting you because they're confident in what you will like. basically, as in any relationship, the person will act as if they are the same type, its understanding this that allows you to ask if its something you can handle, or if your types are too different.

  6. #116
    Senior Member Lily flower's Avatar
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    I know an ENFJ and ISTJ couple, and although their marriage works on a practical level, I think it's an absolute disaster. They don't seem to "get" each other at all.

  7. #117
    Senior Member Sparrow's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ariel View Post
    Thanks for all of your answers, people!

    I'm still confused though, what is it that you don't like about ENFJs in relationships? Usually ENFJ's are really caring people focusing on their peers' well-being. Would seem natural for them to do so as well in a relationship!
    Quote Originally Posted by runvardh View Post
    I mostly worry about an ENFJ feeling like she needs to be my mommy. I already had one and she failed miserably. I just want a partner in crime...
    lol because I care so much, I annoy the hell out of my entp boyfriend. he is so impatient....

  8. #118
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    i hate ENFJs :steam:
    i actually only know one. and i don't hate her at all
    i just hate that she is in complete control of my emotions when i'm around her.
    i hate that one day she will make me feel so good about myself.. like she needs me, and then the next day she will barely even acknowledge me. and she'll be off making other people think she cares about them.

    i mean.. maybe i am the one to blame. i hate feeling like i'm unwanted or i'm annoying someone. i have this stupid "if you don't care about me, i don't give a shit about you" image that i subconciously try to give off. i don't want her to know how much she matters to me.. but really my best days are the days we connect and my worst are the days she seems to forget i exist.

    i think i might be pushing her away.. maybe she really wants to be close to me but doesn't know how because if anything she probably thinks that i find her annoying.. i don't, i just get annoyed when i see her treat random people she barely knows almost the same way she treats me. it makes me feel like shit and i'm sure she has no idea.

    we are both in the same group of really close friends. we hang out all the time and get along really well, but like i said, there are times when i feel like she doesn't actually care about me at all. i hate that this whole thing bugs me so much

    ....SO... my question for all you ENFJs is how can i get closer to her? being pushy is not my nature at all. normally it isn't difficult for me to let people get close to me.. but with her it's different. i feel like i have my guard up.. probably because i realllly like her. :\

  9. #119
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    Quote Originally Posted by Valerie View Post
    I know an ENFJ and ISTJ couple, and although their marriage works on a practical level, I think it's an absolute disaster. They don't seem to "get" each other at all.

    So... Socionics duality= great working relationship but not much true understanding?

    (that is assuming you would consider them to be the same types in Socionics as they are in MBTI)

  10. #120
    Iron Maiden fidelia's Avatar
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    I agree. My parents are that combo and while they have in practical terms got many great commonalities and complementary strengths, they really don't "get" each others basic motivations or thought processes. They probably have more going for them than many couples in terms of what they want out of life and how they wish to live, but they are not mind-mates. If that matters to the ENFJ particularly, this is not the match for them.

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