• You are currently viewing our forum as a guest, which gives you limited access to view most discussions and access our other features. By joining our free community, you will have access to additional post topics, communicate privately with other members (PM), view blogs, respond to polls, upload content, and access many other special features. Registration is fast, simple and absolutely free, so please join our community today! Just click here to register. You should turn your Ad Blocker off for this site or certain features may not work properly. If you have any problems with the registration process or your account login, please contact us by clicking here.

[NF] Why NFs pity themselves so much ?

Athenian200

Protocol Droid
Joined
Jul 1, 2007
Messages
8,828
MBTI Type
INFJ
Enneagram
4w5
No I don't think that NF are the only ones with the tendency. But I think that NF could be the most likely group to act this way.

Why NFs in particular? My impression is that INPs do this more than other types.

I think that NF are good in healing them self but they are also the most likely to have sudden emotional problems and out burts.

Hmm... I can kind of see this, but I don't see it as related to the following statement.
That may well be true in that NFs like to inhabit their feeling states whatever they may be. I don't know about it being an NFP thing. I think it's that for many NFs the way they are feeling can be the reality and they don't particularly want cheering up. It's what is on their mind, hence they talk about it.

Once again, you're describing why INFPs frustrate me. :)

It seems you're only describing one kind of NF, and most of their flaws are shared in parallel ways by INTPs.

It's also possible that your tenuous grasp of the English language (and presumably our culture) is causing you to miss nuance and interpret emotional expression in an exaggerated way due to the rougher nature of your own culture.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
i didn't read it but who else thinks ao is obsessed with nf's?

it just occurred to me that every time I read one of your posts, I "hear" you reading it out loud in my version of what I think your voice sounds like. I really need to examine this... :shock:
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
19,769
It's also possible that your tenuous grasp of the English language (and presumably our culture) is causing you to miss nuance and interpret emotional expression in an exaggerated way due to the rougher nature of your own culture.

That is probably true and I am thinking it is true for a long time.

I have neven created a few threads about this kinds of things.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
it just occurred to me that every time I read one of your posts, I "hear" you reading it out loud in my version of what I think your voice sounds like. I really need to examine this... :shock:

cool...i like that.
actually...you might find you hear that with most enfp posts. i do.
 

JocktheMotie

Habitual Fi LineStepper
Joined
Nov 20, 2008
Messages
8,491
it just occurred to me that every time I read one of your posts, I "hear" you reading it out loud in my version of what I think your voice sounds like. I really need to examine this... :shock:

I do this too. Most everyone else is just read in my voice. But EA, I hear her voice and inflection instead. They seem more real for some reason.
 

BlackCat

Shaman
Joined
Nov 19, 2008
Messages
7,038
MBTI Type
ESFP
Enneagram
9w8
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Most of the time when I have a personal problem the answer is right there in front of my nose... and most of the time when these people make these emo posts the answer to their problem is right there in the post. :thinking: Which is a reason why those threads/posts confuse me. I'm right there with you AO, those threads do annoy me a good bit.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
I do this too. Most everyone else is just read in my voice. But EA, I hear her voice and inflection instead. They seem more real for some reason.

Seriously, it's like she's in the room reading over my shoulder.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
I am watching the NF forum all the time and there is something that I can't overlook.

What I can't overlook is how many post here are written in the stile : I am depressed, do others like me, I suck at life, why people don't like me and stuff like that.

In NT forum there are similar posts but there is a smaller amount of them and I would dare to say that conversations are more constructive.

Here you just have a emofest of some sort and it is almost like you are making eachother depressed. (and enjoy it)


I am sorry but I really don't understand what you are trying to achive if you have a goal in the first place. Are you just venting ? Or you really need attention of others to talk to you about emotions you have at the moment?


alright...so i read the op and ao i get that must seem odd. we nf's are emotional creatures you see and at times when we feel off or unsettled about something we reach out to someone who may be able to relate...perhaps offer a bit of support or a new perspective that will help us process it and come to terms with it so we can move on.

i don't know how else to say it really...you have a thought you want to clarify so you make a thread to discuss it...and these sorts of posts are about someone needing to clarify their feelings about something.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
alright...so i read the op and ao i get that must seem odd. we nf's are emotional creatures you see and at times when we feel off or unsettled about something we reach out to someone who may be able to relate...perhaps offer a bit of support or a new perspective that will help us process it and come to terms with it so we can move on.

i don't know how else to say it really...you have a thought you want to clarify so you make a thread to discuss it...and these sorts of posts are about someone needing to clarify their feelings about something.

nice, keep talkin' lady!

:rofl1:
 
G

Glycerine

Guest
Athenian 200 said: "NFJs seem to be drawn towards the common areas rather than the temperament areas, since we usually want more diversity of opinion"

I'm going to have to respectfully disagree with this. I have thus far stuck to the NF area because I'm new, but I have also lurked in other places. Also, I have a friend who is INFJ and she is less tolerant of political differences than I am as an INFP so I'm not sure that INFJs generally want more diversity of opinion than INFPs. In fact, INFPs are supposed to be less judgemental unless their core values are crossed, so...
I would disagree with the bolded statement. This is probably not related to type at all. i have known some extremely closed-minded and judgmental NFP types where I just had to keep my mouth shut because they were ramming their ideas down my throat. It probably has more to do w/ maturity than anything else.
 

jenocyde

half mystic, half skeksis
Joined
Jan 2, 2009
Messages
6,387
MBTI Type
ENTP
Enneagram
7w8
whaaaaat? haha...you laughin at me girl!

Not laughing at you at all! Laughing at myself and the situation. I said I can "hear" your posts, and then all of a sudden you write this kinda long one and I couldn't help but giggle while you "read" it to me. I need help... :hug:
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
Not laughing at you at all! Laughing at myself and the situation. I said I can "hear" your posts, and then all of a sudden you write this kinda long one and I couldn't help but giggle while you "read" it to me. I need help... :hug:

haha!!! that shit is hilaaaaarious! :smile:
 

Virtual ghost

Complex paradigm
Joined
Jun 6, 2008
Messages
19,769
alright...so i read the op and ao i get that must seem odd. we nf's are emotional creatures you see and at times when we feel off or unsettled about something we reach out to someone who may be able to relate...perhaps offer a bit of support or a new perspective that will help us process it and come to terms with it so we can move on.

i don't know how else to say it really...you have a thought you want to clarify so you make a thread to discuss it...and these sorts of posts are about someone needing to clarify their feelings about something.

But I don't understand why. Which is because I don't understand the mind set. Why you reach out for others? Why don't you start thinking about solving the actual problem? I presume that NFs can do that but they don't in many cases.
Are your emotions so overpowering in critical situations?
 

faith

New member
Joined
Apr 25, 2007
Messages
408
MBTI Type
INFJ
I am watching the NF forum all the time and there is something that I can't overlook.

What I can't overlook is how many post here are written in the stile : I am depressed, do others like me, I suck at life, why people don't like me and stuff like that.

In NT forum there are similar posts but there is a smaller amount of them and I would dare to say that conversations are more constructive.

Here you just have a emofest of some sort and it is almost like you are making eachother depressed. (and enjoy it)


I am sorry but I really don't understand what you are trying to achive if you have a goal in the first place. Are you just venting ? Or you really need attention of others to talk to you about emotions you have at the moment?

As a matter of fact, we pity most people. You, the person beside you, the person who posted just before us. We're all sad little losers. But we're too polite to pity the rest of the world openly; we wouldn't want to hurt their feelings. So we pity ourselves and thereby acknowledge our common ineptitude.
 

Lady_X

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2008
Messages
18,235
MBTI Type
ENFP
Enneagram
784
Instinctual Variant
sx/sp
But I don't understand why. Which is because I don't understand the mind set. Why you reach out for others? Why don't you start thinking about solving the actual problem? I presume that NFs can do that but they don't in many cases.
Are your emotions so overpowering in critical situations?

man...i don't think you listened.

do you like to discuss things? like this thought of yours...this confusion about this topic...why didn't YOU just work it out for yourself....can you but you just chose not to?

i am saying that it is the same thing...it is a feeling rather than a thought that needs to be sorted out so discussing it helps...same process different objective.
 

OrangeAppled

Sugar Hiccup
Joined
Mar 20, 2009
Messages
7,626
MBTI Type
INFP
Enneagram
4w5
Instinctual Variant
sp/sx
man...i don't think you listened.

He hasn't listened. That has already been addressed by several people in several posts...

The solution is usually expressed in their venting. They know the solution, but they need to clear the messy emotions before they can take action. You want to cook in a clean kitchen, y'know?
 

SpottingTrains

New member
Joined
Jan 21, 2009
Messages
444
MBTI Type
ENFJ
Enneagram
3w2
But I don't understand why. Which is because I don't understand the mind set. Why you reach out for others? Why don't you start thinking about solving the actual problem? I presume that NFs can do that but they don't in many cases.

In many cases it's good to have a sounding board on your thoughts. Not everyone has gone through the same struggles in life so we use that to our advantage. Deadlocking yourself to only your own views may prove useful in some situations but overall allowing people to comment and provide insight on your thoughts is an excellent way to get past life's roadblocks.

Are your emotions so overpowering in critical situations?

Yes, from an ENFJ perspective I feel emotionally overpowered whenever I am insulted by another person. There was a thread on this awhile back but to summarize it is hard for me to distance myself from any emotional attack and see the logic behind it. There will be a window of time where all I think about is how what you just said relates to me and if it is true or not. Pink mentioned that it is akin to being slapped and I fully agree.
 
Top