that's what happens when you work things out and attempt to move on to more complex understandings. there's always more unseating the finished product. trying to figure it out is a huge part of the process of determining what it means to you. exploring via Ne- there's no shame in that. we all have our methods with their own strengths and weaknesses. i too easily see people as if they are ideas, looking thru them for a conceptual picture of which they are but a single cell. we all have diverging paths to becoming ethical and humane, while still being practical, functional, adaptable, and capable of getting/synthesizing new information. valuing what is here while imagining something better, being open to something better, etc.