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  1. #41
    Reason vs Being ragashree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Anja View Post
    Laffin'. Is that what happened?

    Sensotard! Yes. . .
    Just the way to catch out a bunch of INFP's, isn't it? too

  2. #42
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    I'm still laffin'.

    I'm so helpful. . .

    How helpful are you?

    I'm so helpful that I'll help somebody who isn't even here.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  3. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by ragashree View Post
    In case anyone else is tempted to post in this thread, please note the start date back in 2007 and that the person who made the OP only made 7 posts and has not posted for over a year. I sensotardishly managed to read right through the thread myself the first time without noticing these rather salient details, otherwise I very much doubt I would have posted myself. It doesn't seem likely that Denial will be back to read any of your carefully thought out responses, so unless there are any other people around who have learned too little about type to do them any good and developed a surreally obsessive prejudice against INFP's as a result, you are likely to be wasting your energy. Deployed Imagination, I appreciate you feel strongly about this due to your recent experiences, but was it REALLY necessary to ressurect this thread to in order to talk about it? There are quite a few other options for talking about your own experiences, including starting your own thread. Maybe others will think differently to me -I'm just posting this so that no-one else is misled into spending time giving an in-depth response to the OP. It seems a bit pointless now.
    to be honest i hadnt realised the age of the thread etc, hadnt really considered it either, just caught my attention and provoked the response, i suppose i am at the stage where i am learning about myself all the time and i think helping others to do so too isnt a bad thing

    new thread it is.. this evening! lol have a good day everyone

  4. #44
    Senior Member Anja's Avatar
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    I'll watch for it, DI.

    'sokay.
    "No ray of sunshine is ever lost, but the green which it awakes into existence needs time to sprout, and it is not always granted to the sower to see the harvest. All work that is worth anything is done in faith." - Albert Schweitzer

  5. #45
    Reason vs Being ragashree's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Deployed Imagination View Post
    to be honest i hadnt realised the age of the thread etc, hadnt really considered it either, just caught my attention and provoked the response, i suppose i am at the stage where i am learning about myself all the time and i think helping others to do so too isnt a bad thing

    new thread it is.. this evening! lol have a good day everyone
    Oh, I get it, you were being sensotard-ish yourself too and got carried away with your feelings. It happens to all of us at times and I have to admit that OP was very provocative - it almost seemed to be bordering on deliberate trolling, though I think it's more likely the person posting was just immature, confused, and misunderstanding MBTI. Yes, I think it's a good idea to start your own thread on this if you have some feelings you want to talk about. I know we INFPs tend to be reluctant to put themselves out there too directly, in case people aren't really interested, etc, etc... but on this site I think a positive and helpful response can generally be expected, so it's probably better to just take the plunge. Speaking of which, did you know there was a thread to introduce yourself? It's not exactly obligatory, but a good way to make yourself known to people when you first join. I notice no INFPs have for a long time, which is strange considering how many there are on the site. Well, feel free to break the trend of self effacement - and welcome to the site

  6. #46

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    Hmm...well I don't know about most of the INFPs you've dealt with, but as one myself, I just say hell with it and find another job with an employer who actually has a sense of humor.

  7. #47
    Senor Membrane
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    Good questions, Denial... I don't find them at all offending, they seem like a possible scenario for myself, but it would mean that the workplace is already toxic for me and that one of the bosses is the main reason for that. So the goal would be to rebel their authority to make it less toxic. Unfortunately this doesn't have a big chance of success, so the workplace would be even more toxic.

    Quote Originally Posted by denial View Post
    This situation is really about INFPs who appear to contribute to, develop and ultimately champion toxic work environments.

    What I've seen -- from the outide, though (if I may say so) like most INFJs I do tend to introject with unintentional clarity -- is the following formula:

    1. An INFP becomes unhappy with how they are being engaged by their workplace. Specifically, an INFP feels that they aren't being appreciated for their unique talents and potential. This can express itself personally, in the INFP not being able to 'do' what they want to do, or it can express itself more abstractly, in the INFP not being able to 'be' what they want to be.
    Yeah, this happened to me just a week ago. I actually ranted about it somewhere on the forum. I was not respected and my work wasn't appreciated and I didn't get along with my boss. Because I had no connection with him, I used to talk about my job with another boss and the first boss took this as a personal insult. Which it wasn't. To me it just seemed like waste of time talking to someone who doesn't understand most of the stuff I am saying, or doesn't care enough to spend a few minutes talking about the project.

    Quote Originally Posted by denial View Post
    2. This INFP starts to 'test workplace boundaries.' This starts out small and pedestrian, such as being a few minutes late for work, and if unmet by some entity that the INFP considers an authority (maybe a manager, maybe not), grows into overt, stark insubordination.
    I wouldn't know if I tested the boundaries. I think the thing that made it awkward for my boss was that I didn't have any respect for him once he had dismissed some of my thoughts. This lack of respect had to be manifested somehow, and he probably saw that.

    Quote Originally Posted by denial View Post
    3. This INFP, unhappy with the quality of feedback they're getting from #2 (this can range from neglect to a continued unwillingness by others to see the INFP as unique/special), starts to *actively convert other people* into a General State of Misery (GSOM). This is especially noticed when new people enter the work environment; they are swiftly recruited by the INFP and told, in absolute terms, that life in that work environment is living hell.
    Well, had I worked more time in there, maybe I would have tried to "form a resistance" but it would have been in vain since I can't really win a fight against the owner of the company, can I? The only point would have been to not feel so lonely with my hate of the atmosphere.

    I think you would need to get an INFP very frustrated about the workplace before anything so dramatic happens, but it is possible, I think. Maybe there are many types of toxicity and the INFPs are reacting to one type and causing another type to surface.

  8. #48

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    I'd rather be a Sensotard than an Intuitard!



    Sensotards rawk on.
    "The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things." - Rainer Maria Rilke

  9. #49
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    Default you are not being unfair

    I am an INFP and have acted out in the workplace in the manner you've decribed - under extreme stress. Since INFPs can very effectively bond with others, when their own emotions are black and tangled, it makes sense that they can powerfully impact a professional environment via seemingly typical/small behaviors that in other types would be disrespected but more easily ignored.

    Your frustrations strike me as genuine, btw. I appreciate your honesty.

    If you are still looking for insights (not sure as your post is a year old), I would say that INFPs act out for the same reasons that anyone does - they are unhappy. Fs are particularly reactive. If you are a friend or are in a position to influence, honestly - good luck! It is a tricky business to guide INFPs out of a bad state since they pick up on and react to agendas and criticism with dislike, despite the intention.

    I was always horrified to think I'd hurt anyone, even when in retrospect it should have been very clear to me that would be the result of the behavor, but the intense emotion I brought to the start of my professional interactions sunk the outcome before self awareness had time to sink in. My co-workers who cared about me were frustrated and even embarrassed at my contradictory behavior, and the people I had bad feelings towards had to deal with outright temper, sullenness and a refusal to speak sometimes. Pretty ridiculous stuff. But by the same token, there were some 'toxic" things happenng in that atmosphere that I was reacting to and not telling anyone about. And for me, people who embody bad character and duplicitous self-interest are powerfully upsetting and can flood my focus if I feel I cannot get away from them.
    Perhaps if I'd made different choices re communicating what was happening, I'd have found an outlet?

    As a side note, when I look back, it strikes me that "offenders" for me were ESs, a combo I have great difficulty relating to to begin with. It would have taken a concentrated effort to bridge the differences. One I would have been happy to attempt absent the antagonism.

    Personally, I had to take a long vacation, then seek some treatment for stress, and then quit that job. And it changed me. If I have a final insight for you it is to see the situation for what it is (extreme stress, they feel antagonized by a particular person, etc), avoid them if the behavior is unacceptable (protect yourself), communicate your concerns to management if you feel there is no other choice. But maybe try to make them smile if you can find the emotional space - genuine kindness always gets a great response and is a lovely way to deal with a problem person - reach out to them

  10. #50
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    That was a very good post there. I agree that INFPs, being intuitive feelers can effect the environment since they bond so well, whether for good or bad, so small things can seem bigger than they are. A long break in spirit, can help to cool things, it would be good for everyone. In my case it'd give me time to re-orient myself and give some space to others. Thanks for all the help, it has/will make a positive difference.

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