User Tag List

Page 3 of 3 FirstFirst 123
Results 21 to 28 of 28

Thread: I am good at writing, but suck at conversing

  1. #21
    Temporal Mechanic. Array Lexicon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    5w6 sp/sx


    I have a similar problem.
    Writing allows for a bit more reflection and internal organization than an on the spot, one-on-one conversation.
    For example.. say there's a topic of discussion/argument. I could write an incredibly comprehensive persuasive essay on my position of the topic; covering many opposing perspectives [thus answering a variety of potential questions]. But if I were to be in an on-the-spot debate.. I'd quickly lose my train of thought, and well, just fail. I need that time, I guess. Writing offers it.

    General discussions regarding a variety of topics or theories, I can typically throw myself into. The only time I have difficulty putting things into words, is when someone wants to discuss [requests], in-person, things of a personal nature regarding me. My feelings. That, I imagine, isn't so much attributed to type as it is to my own repressed issues.

    But yeah. I relate.
    03/23 06:06:58 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:06:59 EcK: lex
    03/23 06:21:34 Nancynobullets: LEXXX *sacrifices a first born*
    03/23 06:21:53 Nancynobullets: We summon yooouuu
    03/23 06:29:07 Lexicon: I was sleeping!

    04/25 04:20:35 Patches: Don't listen to lex. She wants to birth a litter of kittens. She doesnt get to decide whats creepy

    02/16 23:49:38 ygolo: Lex is afk
    02/16 23:49:45 Cimarron: she's doing drugs with Jack

    03/05 19:27:41 Time: You can't make chat morbid. Lex does it naturally.

  2. #22
    the Dark Prophet of Kualu Array Serendipity's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2009


    Quote Originally Posted by Skyward View Post
    Totally true! I always feel like such a dag when I cant say a simple idea coherently. I find when I talk with my INTP friend we can brainstorm easily and communicate effectively. Especially since we've been friends for so long that we can say some thing like 'Can you do that to the thing so this will happen?' and the other understands what the talker meant perfectly. I always wonder how other people hearing the conversation will react (Especially Ss)
    I have a friend just like that and we just come out as really good friends and they either decide to;
    A. Ignore us until we speak directly to third part.
    B. Ask after every little word and when we try to explain, nobody gets it anyway.
    Open for interpretation.
    Fell for the temptation: Nohari / Johari

  3. #23
    thankful Array PeaceBaby's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    937 so/sx


    I find sometimes the issue is more that we are worrying about what to say next than just trusting our brains & mouths to engage correctly at the appropriate moment.

    Just listen to what the other person is saying, without that filter of "oh, what will I say next, this is so awkward, I'll mess this up etc etc."

    Listen and respond. Let yourself speak as slowly or as quickly as you want. Practice, practice, practice! It will come more naturally to you!

  4. #24
    Intriguing.... Array Quinlan's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2008


    At least you got the writing thing going for ya!
    Act your age not your enneagram number.

    Quinlan's Creations

  5. #25
    Senior Member Array Lacey's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    6w5 sp/sx


    ^ Yeah, don't feel too bad, I'm bad at both.

  6. #26
    RETIRED Array CzeCze's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007


    Quote Originally Posted by whimsical View Post
    Unfortunately I cannot go about handing around folded letters of paper containing my deepest thoughts (which by the way are humorously written and interesting to read) and such to random people I have yet to become close with.

    why lord

    If it makes you feel any better, this is quite common. I believe it has to do with introversion? And I'm not even kidding. A lot of great writers, thinkers, and even performers, are quite shy or even painfully awkward in public and when it comes to socializing with others.

    Consider it a special challenge.

    Does it take you longer in person to think of things to say? Maybe part of that is your own nervousness or discomfort? Relaxing goes a long way to finding and using your 'authentic' voice.
    “If you want to tell people the truth, make them laugh, otherwise they'll kill you.” ― Oscar Wilde

    "I'm outtie 5000" ― Romulux


  7. #27
    heart on fire Array
    Join Date
    May 2007


    Quote Originally Posted by CzeCze View Post
    Does it take you longer in person to think of things to say? Maybe part of that is your own nervousness or discomfort? Relaxing goes a long way to finding and using your 'authentic' voice.
    For me, it's a question of energy. When I am feeling higher energy, words come easier, but if it's a down day, relaxing doesn't matter that much. I am less "afraid" of other people now than when younger, but the thing about not always being great with spoken communication (really around 25 I first became more cognizant about it being such an issue, because I was coming out of my self-imposed shell and pushing to commnicate more often with more people, before that I think being shyer and keeping to myself kept me from depleting energy that much,.)

    It can happen even with someone I know well and feel comfortable around. It's got more to do with something internal in my own brain than anything else I think. Caffiene can help loosen my tongue (some time way too much!)with it but gives me the physical shakes and some anxiety issues so it's a toss up there.

  8. #28
    Aspie Idealist Array TaylorS's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    972 so/sp
    EII Ni


    Asperger's + dominant Ni + stuttering together makes speaking much more difficult then writing for me. My prosody is strange and words often seem to get "stuck in my throat" are are hard to "spit out". I tend to think in mental images and have trouble expressing them in spoken words.
    Autistic INFP

Similar Threads

  1. Are there any Ns who really suck at interpreting literature or poetry?
    By Halfjillhalfjack in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 76
    Last Post: 02-09-2010, 07:20 PM
  2. I suck at typing - help!
    By alicia91 in forum What's my Type?
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 07-26-2009, 08:04 AM
  3. Why do I suck at biology?
    By prplchknz in forum The Fluff Zone
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 06-20-2009, 04:52 PM
  4. Why do all the popular MBTI websites suck at information?
    By polikujm in forum Myers-Briggs and Jungian Cognitive Functions
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: 03-07-2009, 06:10 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts